Mr. Zhu Guangqian said in "Wasted Time for Beauty: Talking about Beauty books": "The reason why people are different from other animals is that they have higher aspirations than men and women in diet, and beauty is one of them." ”
A person who truly understands aesthetics, his life is not only to survive, but really live.
When does aesthetic cultivation start best? There is no doubt that it begins in the early stages of the child's growth with aesthetic concepts.
In fact, there is a phenomenon in some families with many children, that is, the clothes of the older children will be worn by the younger children.
In fact, this is a very common situation, because the child's growth rate is very fast, which can avoid waste and reduce expenses.
However, from the age of three, parents are advised to reduce such operations. Because now is not such a difficult time after all, if the material allows the conditions, or try to wear less old clothes for children.
Children don't seem to understand anything, in fact, their minds are very heavy, and children who always wear old clothes are prone to the following three negative effects.
Influence the child's aesthetics
Why different people look at the same thing, but can get different feelings, and even have the opposite evaluation, it is precisely because their "aesthetic education" is different.
What is "aesthetic education"?
Mr. Zhu Guangqian divides the education of a person's life into three types: intellectual education, moral education and aesthetic education. Intellectual education is true knowledge and wisdom, moral education is goodness and will, and aesthetic education is the education of taste and emotion.
Children will enter a period of aesthetic sensitivity between the ages of two and a half and five, and many children who are accustomed to wearing old clothes will lose their aesthetic standards and the right to choose.
Even after he grows up, he will get used to passive acceptance, whether it is beautiful or ugly, even if he really doesn't like it in his heart.
In fact, aesthetics are not only beautiful in appearance, but also involve the appreciation and recognition of things.
A person who knows how to discover and appreciate beauty can not only cultivate and cultivate temperament, but also obtain a different vision and life pattern.
It will make the child feel that he does not deserve better
I read a post that said it was a girl who had been wearing her brother's old clothes when she was a child, and when she went to elementary school, she was picking up her cousin's old clothes.
Her cousin was from a school with her, and she deliberately avoided her cousin when she was in school. Until now, she felt as if she was still living in someone else's shadow.
Many parents think that the clothes are comfortable and clean, but when the child has a sense of autonomy, after going to kindergarten or school, if he always wears old or inappropriate clothes, he is easy to be ridiculed by others.
And this feeling of not being recognized by the group will continue throughout his life. Children's expression ability is limited, but they are sensitive, and over time, it is easy to form an inferiority complex.
As they grow, if they can't break this psychological cue, more and more negative emotions will arise. Feeling that they have no value and inferior status to others, they can do it at will. You don't need to be good, and you don't deserve better.
It will induce the child's over-compensatory psychology
After the child has already had independent thoughts, it is still insisting on giving the child other people's old clothes, which will easily induce an over-compensatory psychology.
That is to say, when the child grows up, he will try to get rid of what he thinks of as a "defect" in other ways.
For example, when you were a child, you have been wearing old clothes, so when you grow up, you may be obsessed with dressing up, especially concerned about appearance. Even uncontrollably, most of the salary will be invested in clothes and hats.
And these investments mask his real needs, which are over-compensated.
Like I had a female classmate in my college dorm room, the family was very strict and never let her eat potato chips or drink Coke. After staying in the school, the Emperor of Heaven was far away, and she released herself, listening to a bag of potato chips and a Coke every day, which lasted for nearly two years.
If you are not a fashionista or engaged in related industries, but choose to invest your energy and money in clothing, it is easy to have a negative impact on your normal life, but this is what many injured children cannot control.
So, can't we dress our children in old clothes?
In fact, the answer is not so absolute, as long as these three points are done well, these negative mentalities can also be eliminated.
First of all, don't give your child clothes that you can often see, other people's children. Otherwise, everyone will know at a glance whose clothes it is, which will hurt the child's self-esteem.
Secondly, ask your child's opinion before wearing it, for example: A friend has sent you some old clothes, are you willing to wear them? Fully respect your child's opinions and decide with your child whether to wear it.
Finally, it depends on the degree of newness and oldness of the clothes, the quality of the clothes, whether they fit, whether they are in line with the current time, and so on.
In short, we must start from the child's psychological feelings, and then the use value of these clothes.
There are pros and cons to giving children old clothes, but the premise must be to respect the child's wishes and not to impose them on others. A child's mental health and growth are crucial to his life and must be treated with caution.
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[Wen | Wei Wei'an: the pen has temperature, for the voice of emotion, an atypical writer who loves words, invites you to perceive life together]