What kind of families do children with low self-esteem and self-confidence come from?

A psychology professor at Stanford University pointed out that the cultivation of children's self-confidence is closely related to family education, and many children have poor social skills and lack of self-confidence when they grow up, all because of the family environment from an early age. Good families will cultivate optimistic, humble, courteous, confident and self-reliant children, on the contrary, bad families will make children slowly become bad tempered, unassertioned, and extremely prone to inferiority when they grow up.

People with low self-esteem are negative, encounter problems first deny themselves, do not have any confidence in themselves, feel that they are not as good as the people around them, in the long run, children are difficult to become excellent, can not have outstanding performance in school and work, even can not get along with the people around them, will not deal with interpersonal relationships, can not integrate into the circle of learning and work, and there will be a glass heart, people around him talk, do things, he will think that he is aiming at himself.

I believe that any parent does not want their children to become like this, parents want their children to have self-confidence, popularity, many families also pay great attention to cultivating children's self-confidence, but do not grasp the scientific and effective method, so there are many children will still become inferior when they grow up. This is something we don't want to see, we want every child to grow up in a positive educational environment, and we hope that they can have a sunny life.

A psychology professor at Stanford University, through a survey of children from hundreds of families, found that those children who grow up with negative inferiority have striking similarities in their family education environment, and the tragedy of children growing up is often caused by unreasonable family education from an early age. If parents cannot find out the lack of children's education in time, so that children have inferiority complex, it is tantamount to ruining the child's life.

Stanford University professor summed up 4 kinds of family education that is easy to make children have inferiority, parents hurry up to see if there is a "recruitment", if there is such a phenomenon in your family, you must quickly change it, do not affect the growth of children because of negligence.

1

Likes to count down children

Many parents are happy to compare, and when they get home, they like to count down their children, "How can you be so stupid, the neighbor's children are much better than you." "Learning so poorly, it's good to play!"

This is the mantra of many parents, as everyone knows, our seemingly careless number of drops will hurt the child's young mind and feel that what they do is inferior to others.

2

Excessive thriftiness

Diligence and thrift are the virtues of the Chinese nation, but everything is too late, many parents in order to cultivate the habit of frugality from an early age, often "cry poor" in front of their children, or do not give their children pocket money, do not buy things for their children and so on.

As everyone knows, such a way will make children have an "inferiority" mentality, feel that they are very poor, and dare not go out to play and chat with their classmates, because the "poor thoughts" instilled by parents unconsciously produce a feeling of "inferiority" in their hearts, affecting normal social relations.

3

Families who use violence

Many parents do not pay attention to the behavior in front of their children, such as arguing or fighting in front of their children.

Such a scene accompanied by domestic violence can cause serious trauma to the child's young mind, or make the child's temper grumpy, because the words and deeds from the parents have given him a false understanding: violence can solve all problems.

4

Both parents are strong

Some families have a very strong personality, which is also reflected in the usual words and deeds of the child, and the child is not allowed to do this, and the child is not allowed to do that. Once a child does something wrong, he will be punished very severely. Parents also never communicate with their children, believing that filial piety comes out under the stick, and such education will only make children more and more inferior.

For children, the real education is from the long-term companionship of parents, every child wants parents to hear their inner voice, and many parents ignore this and always impose their own ideas on their children, whether the child wants to or not. If parents are willing to communicate with them carefully, they will find a lot of things that move you, and it is not the children who are bad, but the complex hearts of our adults.

So, what kind of family do confident children generally come from?

● Parents are willing to spend time with them

Children who are not accompanied by their own parents, but who are brought up by their relatives around them, are difficult regrets for children and parents.

The growth of children needs the company of parents, and it is impossible to miss it until it is a last resort.

Carrie Lam – Hong Kong's first female chief executive, the fifth chief executive of the Hong Kong Special Administrative Region, and a strong political woman. Who's to say she's not busy at work?

But she was also an excellent mother, and her two sons were admitted to Cambridge University.

She once said in an interview: "When my two children were young, I never hired a service staff, cooking and other chores are done by myself, I think this is very important, children should feel that their mother is taking care of them." ”

Although her career is important in her heart, she cannot be half negligent in the company of her children. When the child was admitted to the United Kingdom, she applied to her superiors to transfer to London to work, and the whole family lived in London to take better care of the children.

Children who have the company of their parents are strong and excellent at heart!

● Harmonious family atmosphere

There is a saying: family harmony, no matter how poor you can make a fortune!

The family is the soil, and the family atmosphere is the air and water, which is invisible but plays a vital role in the child's life.

In life, children with character defects due to the tense family atmosphere abound.

Some people are very anxious from childhood because of the disharmonious relationship between their parents, careful in doing things, and very inferior, and they do not know how to deal with their emotional relationships when they grow up.

Some people because their parents always quarrel, stay at home is very depressed, always have time to go out to play games on the Internet, wait until the university, volunteer to fill in a city far from home, can not go home as much as possible not to go home!

The family atmosphere is not harmonious, and the child will be extremely insecure and become introverted and inferior. And the children raised by the harmonious family are always sunny and cheerful, and they are also willing to communicate.

●Know how to respect children

Zhou Guoping said: Loving children is an instinct, and respecting children is a kind of upbringing.

Respect means treating the child as an individual, not condescending to criticize the child and deny the child. We can also listen to what is really going on in our children's hearts.

There are many daughters of Huang Lei in the second season of "Where Did Daddy Go", and everyone is not strangers.

The 8-year-old Duoduo has been the role of a big sister throughout the show, taking care of her younger siblings and receiving praise from many parents.

Toto, who is now less than 12 years old, is not only well-behaved and sensible, but also versatile, speaks fluent English, and also voices the role of the "little girl" in the French animated film "The Little Prince", which is really the best among his peers.

Although the star has its own aura, how many people can understand the efforts behind Huang Lei.

In Huang Lei's educational philosophy, respect comes first.

In the show, Huang Lei mostly entrusts many things to her to solve, rather than treating her as a child, which is the greatest respect given to children.

It is precisely because of this respect that Duoduo can become the most responsible and confident child in the show!

Source: The picture and text come from the network, invaded and deleted.

EDIT: Xiao Huang