Wen | condensed mother's understanding
Not afraid of everyone's jokes, Erbao is more than 4 years old, and it has been more than a month recently to solve the problem of stool. The bowel movements are smooth, pleasant, good in character, and very regular once a day.
In the past two years, Erbao has been tortured by stool, and every time he mentions the word "stool", he will feel nervous and cry incessantly.
Preferring to hold the stool once every 7 days or 10 days, or even pull it into his pants, he would say "No, don't go to the poop.".
As soon as she thought of this problem, Her mother was very anxious and broken. Garbage accumulates in the body, produces toxins, cannot be discharged, is harmful to the body, how can it grow healthily.
Seeking medical advice and trying to solve it all sorts of things was not completely resolved, and when I decided to go with the flow, the situation took a turn for the better.
Two years ago, Erbao became afraid of feces
Erbao's stool was very regular before he was 2 and a half years old, and after 2 and a half years old, he once held his stool for a week and did not want to pull. The mother feels that it is also normal to feel that it is also normal once by chance, and the child's diet, exercise, and physical condition are related, which can be pulled one hundred percent a day!
However, grandma, who was obsessed with poop once a day, couldn't help it, coaxed him to sit on the toilet, read and told stories and exhausted all kinds of tricks, and froze for an hour, and the second treasure was not pulled.
Grandma finally became angry with Erbao, and on the same day, erbao began to cry. Ning's mother believes that Erbao's psychology is affected and can no longer force the child to pull stool, and the grandmother reluctantly gives up.
Grandma made another move to make Erbao crouch on the ground and read a book, and as a result, Erbao pulled the stool along the way. From this point of view, in a relaxed state, there is no problem with erbao's normal stool.
Perhaps this incident left a psychological shadow on Erbao, and since then, Erbao has learned to hold back, pulling once every few days, the longest one for 10 days. When he had the intention of defecation, he did not dare to sit down, lying down, lying on his stomach, turning in circles, shrugging his shoulders, trying to hold the poop back, not wanting to pull it out, so he coaxed and persuaded, and then he reluctantly pulled it.
This situation lasts for two years, and it is really devastating to face a child who cries out of rejection.
Pull the stool on your pants in kindergarten
Erbao went to kindergarten when he was almost 4 years old, and he was also a little worried, when he had a bowel intention in kindergarten, what should the teacher do if he could not find out in time?
Suddenly one day I received a call from the teacher, and Erbao pulled it into his pants.
After the nap, the other children happily moved, Erbao sat still, the teacher found that something was wrong, went to ask him what was wrong, and as a result, he smelled the smell and guessed that he had pulled up his pants.
The teacher took Erbao to the bathroom again, let him squat and pull for a while, and pulled out a lot of strange smell. Saved for several days, can it not stink? It doesn't harden, and it's good to be able to pull it out.
At that time, the 3 pairs of pants inside and outside were all dirty, and the tops were also affected, which was a mess.
Situations like this one that pulled up pants, which happened twice later, were at home, of course. Erbao said that he was embarrassed to pull his pants in the kindergarten, it was too smelly, he would be laughed at, and it would be troublesome to clean up. When he has poop, he will sit on the stool and twist his ass to make the poop retract.
Hey, it's really hard for the child, when is the head.
I used to comfort myself with the desire period, but after the desire period still did not improve
When the first time of the stool seizure occurs at the age of 2 years old, it can be explained by the desire period. Freud believed that between the ages of 1 and a half and a year and 3 he reached the period of desire, and liked to hold back, express pain, and study stool.
But this stage will last for 2 months, up to half a year, the two treasures are 4 years old, has already passed the desire period, how is it still like this, I can't figure it out, but I can't be equated with the desire period.
Moreover, in order to help Erbao successfully pass the period, he read him a lot of books about poop, and he was about to become a poop expert.
Like "Body Book for Children", "Poop Book 1+2", "Wonderful Body Travel", "Our Body", "The Mystery of the Human Body", "Intestinal Slide Grunting" and so on. Among them, "Body Book for Children" has been turned over by him, and it is not too much to say that he has read it a thousand times.
His knowledge of stool can be described as a treasure, what are the components of the digestive system, the digestive process of food, the quality of the stool, etc., he knows everything.
But he speaks of scientific knowledge, but in action he is fighting against scientific knowledge.
For example, he often said, "When the body reaches the time of the stool, it must follow the rhythm, if you can't bear not to go to the toilet, the stool will become hard, and sometimes, the stool will become so large that it will cause small cracks in the anus." ”
But he didn't come to the rhythm all the time, making the stool become very large, prolonging the discharge time, and increasing the pain.
I asked the doctor several times, and the final plan was ineffective
There is a saying that professional things are left to professional people to do, in addition to considering the child's psychological problems, the mother also suspects that the child has pathological problems, and has also taken Erbao to see Chinese medicine and Western medicine many times.
The Chinese medicine doctor diagnosed that the child had no problem, told him to drink more water, and then prescribed a medicine bag, put it on the navel for a week, and then it would be completely fine.
As a result, it did improve for a while, but it was short, and it was repeated again after a few times.
Western medicine diagnosed that the large intestine was slow to move, the spleen and stomach were weak, and 5 kinds of drugs were prescribed and let go back to drink for 15 days.
We waited with great anticipation to witness the miracle, but unfortunately, the poop problem of the second treasure was as solid as a rock, and there was no improvement, originally once every four or five days, once a week, it became once every 10 days.
I also once bought Kaiselu, and Erbao strongly opposed the use of it, so it was used in half and never used again.
This road is not passable, and we know that there is nothing wrong with the child, we decided not to struggle and tangle anymore, or let nature take its course, maybe it is better to grow up.
Unexpectedly, suddenly improved, overjoyed
Sometimes, things are just sudden, and the solution of the problem happens quietly.
More than a month ago, at night, Ling Ma saw Erbao sitting on the sofa and not lying down, feeling that he was going to defecate, quickly put down the work in his hand, carried him to the bathroom, and pressed him to the toilet.
He actually didn't say a word, "Mm-hmm" a hard, easy to pull out. At this moment, Erbao happily opened the conversation box and began to talk about the professional knowledge of the stool.
Seeing that he was in a good mood, he decided to make an appointment with him, and discussed that he would sit on the toilet every night at 6 pm and develop the habit of defecating every day, and Erbao agreed.
We do what we say, every day after that, we go to the toilet between 6 and 7 o'clock to report, sometimes smoothly, sometimes troublesome, but every day can pull out a part, which gives Erbao a lot of confidence. Sometimes it feels that the time is a little long, the mother wants to give up, and the second treasure must be insisted on, so I slowly develop a habit.
Things are going more and more smoothly, Erbao can now pull out a lot of soft poop every day, every day is elated, the amount of food is much larger, forming a virtuous circle.
I have also made an agreement before, but I have not insisted on it, and the reason why this time it is so smooth, there are several reasons for the analysis of the mother:
1, the child is 4 years old, more sound mind. Have the determination to change, better understand the agreement, abide by the agreement, and have more perseverance to insist.
2, parents relax, children relax. Often give the child psychological hints that his own feelings are more important, the stool will make him comfortable, rather than pleasing others, it does not matter if he does not pull it out once, next time there will be a chance.
3. The amount of activity of the child increases. The weather is warm, every day to go to school and ride a bicycle exercise, every time after school, you can walk home by yourself, once it is half an hour, after going home, you have to go to the slide to play crazy for a while, and the activities in the school have also increased. Exercise increases the rate of peristalsis of the intestines, and the stool is smoother.
4, children's eating habits are better. Went to kindergarten for a semester, familiar with the environment, eat better in kindergarten, did not eat much afternoon tea before, every time can eat all, to maintain a pleasant mood, in the evening and then casually add a little, than the previous amount of food is larger. Now, Erbao can eat with his brother, and is driven to eat more abundantly and comprehensively, and the nutrition is more balanced. When the diet becomes better, the state of the poop becomes better.
(To add: it is said that it is not easy to drink more water, the second treasure drinks water has been a lot, and has been drinking boiled water, never drink drinks, poop is not good can not be all blame water, but also comprehensive consideration! ）
epilogue
The two-year war and the poop finally came to an end, and it was very gratifying. Writing these words is to record the growth of the child, but also want to tell the parents who are reading this article that it is normal for the child to have problems, and our anxiety and collapse will not solve any problems, but will only make the problem worse.
Don't force the child to grow, give the child a period of time, give the child a good mood, take good care of the child, wait quietly, the problem will always be solved one day.
I'm @Gelma Goku
Mother of two boys, more than 10 years of parenting experience
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