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The mention of the topic of easy to meet scumbags reminds me of a very classic Japanese movie, "The Life of the Abandoned Matsuko".
The heroine in the movie will always meet unreliable men, but after being hurt, she not only does not learn a lesson, but also fights the fire every time, making her life more chaotic and bad.
Of course, back to our real life, there are quite a few such women.
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Why do women who know that they are encountering scumbags and women can't control themselves from throwing themselves at each other?
There are several common reasons, and today we will take stock.
First, the savior mentality.
In addition to acting more romantic, scumbags will also behave more melancholy from time to time.
However, women are born with natural maternal love, and they will unconsciously want to please each other and save each other.
Just like the movie I said at the beginning, "The Life of the Rejected Pine Nuts", the heroine Matsuko belongs to the kind of character that pleases and saves.
While working as a waiter in Tokyo, Matsuko met the scumbag.
In order to stay by the side of this scumbag, she endured the violence and arrogance of the other party, and even willingly applied for prostitutes in order to provide for the other party's life.
But she gave everything, but still did not get the love she wanted, and the scumbag turned and threw himself into the arms of another woman.
Second, indulge in sweet talk
The most habitual means of scumbags is sweet talk, and women are usually easily attracted to these superficial things.
There is a more classic analogy on the Internet:
Scumbags are like junk food, like high-calorie foods such as fried chicken and cola.
We all know that this food is very unhealthy, but it is difficult to resist the temptation to live with it, because it is really fragrant.
I've also communicated with some women, and one of them likes scumbags, but she knows very well that she likes scumbags.
She said: "I know he's a scumbag, we're going to have no results, we'll end up being cheated and let down, but the sweet talk is really good." ”
So even if she knows that such a relationship will not bear fruit, she still wants to enjoy the process of being bombarded with sweet words.
Third, love takes advantage
I believe that everyone has heard of online fraud, and those who are deceived are generally greedy and cheap, taking advantage of people.
However, this kind of person who likes to take advantage is popularly because he is not very clear about what he wants, or he does not want to get extra things through hard work.
People who have won the internet fraud scam are usually because they can't resist the temptation of the other party and want to become a millionaire overnight.
But if there is such a good thing in this world, if you want to get it for free, you are doomed to be deceived.
Fourth, I like fantasy
When a boy inexplicably praises the girl and says that he has been crazy and can't help himself from falling in love with each other, what will the other party think at this time?
Normal girls usually have the first reaction to feeling that there is something wrong with the other party, and even immediately keep a distance from the other party.
Because this kind of love without a communicative basis is unlikely to have true love.
But girls who prefer fantasy, or who have little experience in this area, do not know their own value in the marriage market.
Then they will be deceived by this sudden confession, and they will feel that the other party really appreciates and loves themselves.
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After analyzing the reasons why women always meet scumbags, we will find that this type of woman has something in common: emotionally independent.
If you are not emotionally independent enough, you will need someone to coax yourself.
And scumbags are just good at providing this excessive emotional value, they can praise each other in a vacuum, and use all kinds of beautiful words to describe each other.
However, such praise is usually not sincere and cannot be sustained.
But if a woman is satisfied and taken seriously in this hypocritical language of praise, and does not adjust in time, she will fall into the trap of scumbags.
The sweetness given by ordinary boys may be the right amount of sugar, and the sweetness given by scumbags is to add a lot of sugar.
Once you get used to this sugar and feel that the scumbag's sugar is the reasonable ingredient to give, then absorbing other things will have no taste, only a feeling of high sugar.
So we have to learn to control the intake of this sugar, because it is not reasonable.
What should you do if you find yourself attracted to scumbags?
Be sure to maintain a robust social system.
That is, in their own social circle, there need to be men and women, older and younger.
In the spare time, you should communicate more, and only by interacting with different people can you understand your own value proposition.
Our value is not made up by our own brains, but reflected in our social circles.
When we understand the value of the self, we will not excessively covet emotional value.
As the saying goes, "All evil is the first."
Of course, "fornication" does not refer to lasciviousness, pornography and other things.
The original meaning of this sentence is excessive, unrestrained.
All bad things are caused by excess, and excess is the source of all evil.
Therefore, by understanding the word, it will be easier to understand the scumbag again, that is, to obsess over the high emotional value provided by the other party.
We need to control our emotional desires and pursue ourselves more for ourselves.
What is "to yourself"?
When you feel unhappy, you can share it with your friends appropriately to seek comfort, but you must not give all your emotions to one person.
You can also participate in more social activities and try to meet new people to cheer yourself up.
We need to learn a habit: to satisfy ourselves as the main, others to satisfy as a supplement.
Because the real self is satisfied with oneself, it will not be too greedy and dependent on the other party.
Ordinary women will covet the rhetoric of men, but mature women will see through each other's tricks after satisfying themselves, and reject the person with a charming smile.
Learning to be self-satisfied is a lesson that women need to learn throughout their lives.
Don't think about getting what you want without making an effort, it will only slowly lose yourself.
Only a woman who knows how to satisfy herself can win the true love of a man.
Author Nannan, focus on the field of emotions to create and share, with emotions to communicate with you and my soul, but I hope you and I know each other here, like please pay attention to me.