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To maintain the most appropriate boundaries with people, to know how to measure up, and not to interfere in things, this is the advice of the elderly who have walked many life paths.
Listening to this kind of words, I believe that many people will disagree, they feel that they are enthusiastic and right, the road is uneven and roaring, worthy of conscience and worthy of heaven and earth.
But in fact, your sense of justice at some point does not bring you praise, but all kinds of speculations that do not understand all kinds of suspicions that you have bad intentions. The most chilling part of human nature is also this, you are obviously well-intentioned, but you often do not get the fairest treatment.
Things in the world are not black and white, and many things become complicated when mixed with human nature and feelings. What is seen on the surface alone can no longer be the sole basis of facts. If you rush to intervene, you will only get a fishy mess.
So remember that no matter who you're with, don't worry about these three things, it's for your own good.
One: Someone else's family affairs
Sun Liang lived in his friend Li He's house for a while, and during that half a month, Sun Liang found that Li He was having a conflict with his sister, and in order to comfort his friend's heart, he followed Li He's words and denigrated his sister in every way.
He thought that what his friend needed was to have someone who stood firmly by his side and supported him when he encountered difficulties, so he stood up and became the person next to Li He, although Li He and his sister were not sure who was right and who was wrong.
But later, after Li He reconciled with his sister, he was instead used as a churning stick, and the relationship with Li He could no longer be restored.
Families have difficult scriptures, and no matter how harmonious the family looks on the surface, there may be all kinds of unbearable things in actual life. When we are trusted enough to have the opportunity to spy on other people's lives, we must not easily meddle in other people's family affairs without knowing the measure.
You are satisfied with a momentary sense of justice, but in the eyes of others, you are a person who does not know how to be measured and nosy, no matter how sincere you are, no one will be willing to believe you anymore.
Two: The path of life that others take
Everyone will have different experiences, will also meet different people, and harvest different cognition and thinking. The path they choose to take in life will also be affected by experiences.
If someone else chooses a different path of life and makes choices other than you know, even if you don't understand, you don't have to teach him as a savior.
What path he chose, his own considerations, adults should also be responsible for the choices they make, and in his life, only he can be responsible for himself, and the intervention of outsiders will only make him feel resentment rather than gratitude.
As Rui Xiaodan said in the book "Distant Savior": As long as I don't feel it and realize it, you can't give it to me, and you can't give it to me.
This is the disposition of a real person, not something he himself has realized, and no matter how you manage it, it will not help.
Three: Something that can't be seen
In this world, the places that can be illuminated by the sun must also have a dark side. If you happen to encounter something unsightly, you don't have to rush to preach, and you don't have to care too much, you will only be blamed for interfering.
In "Ode to Joy", Qu Xiaoxiu discovered the true face of Qiu Yingying's boyfriend, Director Bai, so he deliberately designed a plot to test Director Bai, with the intention of seducing him, so that Qiu Yingying could brake the car in time without being hurt by Director Bai.
She has good intentions, but in Qiu Yingying's view, she has bad intentions. She believes that Qu Xiaoxiu is to show her feminine charm, and the other is because she can't see their love, so she designed seduction, and from the beginning she did not have a good heart.
So she has always held a grudge against Qu Xiaoxiu, believing that she has destroyed the incomparably sincere love between her and Director Bai.
In the face of idle things, we had better press our hearts to save the heavens. Even if you really want to shoot, you have to measure whether it is worth it.
Sometimes it is really not that people are cold, but they are afraid of being easy to do, but in the end only you are condemned, and then you have become a sinner, but even if you have a hundred mouths, you will not be able to explain your original intention.
No matter who you are with, no matter how close your relationship with the other person is, the above three idle things are best not to easily interfere.
If you don't care, the relationship between you can still keep the original appearance. Once you intervene, your behavior will be interpreted and speculated by all kinds, and the feelings mixed with doubts are doomed to not go long, and your feelings are destined to disappear.
END