The world is changing, the surrounding environment is changing, you have to learn to change yourself, in order to grow and mature. A person's true maturity begins with changing oneself.
First, change your thinking
Since childhood, I have learned the story of Yugong moving mountains in textbooks. Yu Gong exerted all his family's strength to remove the mountain that stood in front of his home, and was determined to have his children and grandchildren dig it down. The spirit of Yugong moving the mountain touched the heavens, and the gods cast spells to move the mountain away. But in real life, the best way is: if the mountain doesn't come, I'll go over. I have heard a saying: "A wall, when it is torn down, is a door; a heart, when it is open, is a road." "Many times, a person is struggling in this world because he does not know how to change his thinking. Being good at changing your thinking is more important than working hard. Thinking right, often can do more with less, life will change with it.
The more people experience, the more we look at the problem from different angles; the more people experience, the more we think about the problem in different directions. When something happens, there must be pros and cons, and sometimes God closes a door for you, but silently opens a window for you. When you feel that when you see a person clearly, we are disappointed, in fact, we should be glad to find out early and can stop the loss in time; when you feel that we are in an adversity, we are wronged, in fact, we can be regarded as experience, constantly grinding ourselves. Change the thinking of one thing, and you will have a new motivation to directly turn defeat into victory and turn the situation around.
Second, change your mindset
There are eight or nine things in life that are not satisfactory, often think about one or two, do not think about eight or nine, and everything is as it should be. "I deeply believe that many times, what can really determine a person's situation is not the ups and downs of the outside world, but your mentality.
People with a bad mentality always focus on the pain in front of them and let frustration eat up their lives. People with a good mentality are often good at reconciling with themselves, not competing with life, and living a full and happy life. In a lifetime, there is always dissatisfaction, there is always a backlash, rather than grumbling, it is better to change the mentality and walk out of the bustling scenery from the desolation.
The late Tang Dynasty Shudi monk Decheng, known as the boat monk, once wrote a sentence: "At night, the still water is cold and the fish do not eat, and the ship is empty and the moon is returning." "Fishing until late at night, but finding nothing, replaced by someone else, must be sullen." But Master Decheng realized the Zen machine from it: this is an empty boat that has not caught a fish, but there is a bright moon sprinkled all over the cabin, and why not return with another full load? It turns out that as long as you change your mindset, things will backfire and you will get what you want, but only in one thought.
Feng Zikai said, "Since there is nowhere to escape, it is better to be happy."
Since there is no Pure Land, it is better to meditate. Since you didn't get your wish, you might as well be relieved. ”
Although the days are not always good, we can still live in peace. Although life is sometimes not satisfactory, we can choose to walk with positive energy. There is no good or bad situation, idealistic creation, it may only take a minute to change your mentality, but this minute can change your life.
Third, change the position
In marriage, the husband hopes that the wife is gentle and virtuous, and the wife hopes that the husband is responsible; in the workplace, the employee hopes that the boss does not talk about ideals, and the boss hopes that the employee is active; in the taxi, the passenger complains that the driver is driving too slowly, and the driver complains that the road is too congested. No one is wrong, just don't understand transposition. Standing in one's own position, seeing only one-sided; standing in one's own point of view, often can not solve the problem.
A rich man who is passionate about charity. In his later years, rich people often go to welfare homes with high-end gifts to visit the lonely and miserable elderly, and let the elderly queue up to receive money. But each time, the old people's attitude towards the rich man was not as friendly as expected. Later, before each departure, he would always instruct the housekeeper to prepare a worn-out dress for himself and bring some cheap gifts. The housekeeper was puzzled, and the rich man explained: "Most of the old people in the welfare home are poor and sloppy, if they are dressed gorgeously, they have a feeling of being on top, I am doing charity, not to show off." I shouldn't give alms, I should fit in. "The fact that the hungry man does not eat the food is not that the food is not delicious, but that Qian Ao does not know how to think in a different position, which makes the hungry man feel humiliated." As the saying goes, "I have seen the greatness of the earth, but I have mercy on the grass and trees." "The more I have seen the world and cultivated people, the more I know how to think in a different position, have compassion, and be kind to the people and things around me." Changing positions and comparing hearts to hearts is the cultivation of kindness. Only by having others in mind and understanding each other can we have warm feelings. May you always change your position and become a light that illuminates others, and can also be illuminated by others.
Transposition is shrewdness; consideration for others is atmospheric; tolerance is wisdom. From your own point of view to measure others, others always have shortcomings; stand in the position of others to consider gains and losses, the problem will be solved. There are no perfect individuals, only souls who are close to each other. Two people get along, it is impossible without friction, two people working together, it is impossible not to have differences. At this time, we need to change our position and change places, and the premise of problem solving is that we can see each other's difficulties.
Fourth, change direction
Someone said, "If you choose the road you choose, you will finish it on your knees." "It encourages people not to hit the south wall and not to turn back, to choose a path, to go to the black, and never give up." In fact, the result of this is that only a very small number of people succeed, and most people will walk into a dead end and be in a dilemma. All roads lead to Rome, and smart people will not knock themselves in the head and break the bloodstream, but will change direction and look for another way to reach the end. When Mr. Lu Xun studied medicine in Japan, he found that the mental numbness of the Chinese people was more terrible than the physical weakness. So he resolutely decided to abandon the medical profession and go to Tokyo to organize a literary magazine, publish articles, and use sharp words to wake up backward and ignorant Chinese people. Wallach, the Nobel prize winner in chemistry, initially followed his parents' advice to take the road of literature, but found nothing, and turned to study oil painting, which the oil painting teacher bluntly said that he was not a material to be made. In the end, he turned to chemistry and became a recognized "high-achieving student" with outstanding achievements and a global reputation. Lin Yutang, a master of traditional Chinese studies, said: "Wise abandonment is better than blind attachment." "Life is never a single choice, blind persistence to the end is not necessarily a good choice, it will only waste life on a difficult and wrong road." Many times, changing the direction in time can we jump out of the limitations in front of us and open up a new situation in life.
"Zhou Yi" has a saying: "Poor is changing, changing is general, and general is long." "Change thinking, get rid of the current predicament, enlarge the pattern, opportunities are everywhere; change the mentality, let the situation turn with the heart, look down on the open, since this world and the world are wide; change the position, learn to think in a different position, compare the heart to the heart, life is suddenly cheerful; change the direction, put down the stop loss in time, change the lane, and there are willows and dark flowers." When a person begins to mature, you will continue to change yourself and make yourself slowly better. So, don't let the value of your life stay in this moment, from now on, change your thinking, change your mindset, change your position, change your direction, and control your life.
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