Write at the beginning:
Once, when I went out to eat, at the dinner table, a so-called "tall man", radiant, able to speak the Tao, but opened his mouth and closed his mouth, he would come to say such a sentence: "You don't know this."
A person who originally felt very admired, but at this dinner table, people had a lot of strange feelings.
Moreover, what is particularly interesting about him is that no matter what others say, they will say: "How have I been", in short, it must be pressed on your head, which makes people feel very uncomfortable.
Even, a little girl, because when she served food, said one more joke, she was scared to tears by him.
This arrogant attitude of stealing the limelight makes everyone feel very embarrassed, and they are all looking forward to this meal, ending it quickly, staying for one more minute, they are all suffering.
Communication between people, many times, pays attention to the law of fate.
Your words and deeds are actually exposing your own upbringing. If you don't know how to think in a different position, don't know how to stand in the perspective of others, and think for others, you can easily say the wrong things, do the wrong things, and easily expose your shortcomings, in order to be partial and complete, and let yourself fall into an embarrassing situation.
Therefore, in dealing with people and interacting with people, we must remember these two words: transposition.
Transposition, in order to see what is "all pleasing to the eye"
I still remember a saying: You don't look good, it's that your pattern is not big enough.
However, the pattern is not big, and the most important point is that you do not know how to empathize.
Just like a blind man touching an elephant, you are likely to touch the elephant's butt, and others are likely to touch the elephant's body. If you make a statement before you have touched it all, then in the end, you will definitely be laughed at by others.
Therefore, people, we must learn to "be careful in words and deeds", do not follow the clouds, do not speak at will. The more you draw conclusions from the perspective of others, the more you understand the whole picture, and the more effective you can use them.
Life is a big dye tank, and all kinds of people have it.
We can't influence the thoughts and "mouths" of others, but we can block out those who bring you "negative energy" from the inside, so learning to think in a different position is an understanding, but also a kind of heart wideness.
It's like, someone goes out to play, sends some travel photos, so someone will come to a comment: This is dazzling, don't you just go out for a trip?
In life, it is inevitable to encounter such a person, but if you understand this person's personality, you will often say some "mean" words on weekdays, look at the love of people's husbands and wives, you will say that people "show love, die fast", see people's children learn well, they will come to a sentence "Is the teacher who changed the volume blind", seeing that people's work has been promoted, they will say "not necessarily how many gifts have been given behind their backs"...
So, once you understand that this person is so "negative energy", it is enough to shield him, there is no need to argue with him.
Knowing how to transpose is a kind of protection for yourself.
Other people's dislikes, don't care, live your own life.
Everyone lives under the sun, everyone is inevitably discussed by others, and loving yourself is the victory of your "transposition".
In order to change positions, in order to keep their "upbringing"
Zhuangzi has a saying: Zi is not a fish, but the joy of knowing the fish.
Yes, everyone has their own bitterness, their own sorrows, and their own unspeakable secrets.
Therefore, most of the things you see in others are only superficial things, which are things that others want to show you, and those who can really become confidants and close friends with you need your understanding and empathy.
After all, in our lifetime, bitter, spicy, sour and sweet, we must taste them one by one.
You think that things that are insignificant are likely to be of great importance in the lives of others; you think that what makes you spend your life chasing, it is very likely that others will not look at them.
"Do not persuade others to be good without suffering from others", this is the truth, do not easily define the words of others, and do not easily degrade the behavior of others to nothing.
To keep one's own morality is to keep one's upbringing.
When interacting with people, we must grasp the measure well, in order to advance and retreat, not to put ourselves in danger, and to know how to think in a different position is to truly understand human nature.
Most of those who can "win the hearts and minds of the people" know a word: give people roses, and leave incense in their hands.
The interaction between people is actually a process of communication between hearts and minds. The more you "care" for others, the more they will "take care" of you.
Transposition, in order to live their own "good life"
Perhaps, in this life, people will always face some choices.
It's like two people who have to ask you to judge, and at this time, what you say, if it is based on your personal considerations, is mostly difficult to convince.
And, if you stand in the perspective of others and evaluate objectively, it is most likely that you will become a "philosopher".
Therefore, empathy is not only a problem of perspective, but also a good way to solve the problem.
Knowing what others are experiencing, understanding the pains involved, being able to consider others, knowing the bitterness of others, and your words and deeds reflect your greatest goodness.
Remember seeing a video once.
After a girl was violated, she climbed to the top of the building with a broken heart and wanted to jump off the building, but many people coaxed under the building, "Why don't you jump yet", "Jump fast", "Jump for three hours, don't jump"... In the end, the girl jumped down in the "language crusade" of the crowd, making the firefighters who rushed to the rescue cry bitterly.
These people who are talking about girls are just a rumor that this woman has children and a family, and in order to threaten her husband with divorce, she jumped off the building.
It makes people feel sad and cold about human nature.
Slander is really easy, and a single sentence can ruin a person's life.
The most important thing for a person to live in one lifetime is to be able to compare heart to heart, so that you can live out your goodness.
If you don't know how to transpose, it is easy to judge others at will, and if you arbitrarily make a small thing into a big thing, you will turn your "hypocrisy" into a "sin" at will.
In life, everyone has their own difficulties, and everyone has their own sufferings.
Those who know how to empathize will understand the suffering of others, understand the pain of others, the difficulty of comforting others, and give people warmth when others need help.
In this way, we can save blessings for ourselves, accumulate popularity, and usher in our own smooth road on the road of life.
Conclusion:
There is an old saying that goes: people often look up, they will grow taller; they will always look down and pick up cheap, they will hunchback.
Therefore, a person, the more far-sighted, the more low-key the behavior, the more reliable for people, the more educated people, the more they will make their image tall, the more they can attract the attention of others, the more they will not act arbitrarily in their dealings, and they will not randomly point fingers at others.
Transposition is an attitude towards life, an understanding of others, and a concern for one's own future.
People's hearts are all interchangeable.
If you are good to others, others must be good to you.
You are cold to others, and others must be far away from you.
Therefore, what you do not want, do not do to others, and treat others well, in fact, you are kind to yourself, and to be good to others is actually to be good to yourself.
Life is long, and everyone lives hard.
Therefore, knowing how to transpose is to pave the way for your future, to save blessings for yourself, and your life will have more chances of winning.
Author, Frank Fox
Figure, network
May you find in my words the ordinary years, a strong affection! Thanks for your attention!