Author/Sunny Day
The relationship between people must pay attention to the sense of distance, and the more kinship, the more it should be so.
Don't think that because you are related, you can speak with impunity. People's hearts are separated from their stomachs, and you will never know the truest thoughts in a person's heart.
Human nature often cannot afford any scrutiny.
The so-called evil comes out of the mouth, and this is exactly what happens. Between relatives, some words can be said, some words absolutely cannot be said, and it is really easy to affect the feelings between each other. Remind you: the biggest decay of a family is not to be poor, but to tell relatives about the 4 privacy of the family.
01. A contradiction belonging to two people;
The contradiction between the two of you, this is your own business, originally opened the words between each other, maybe this matter will pass, there will be no estrangement in your hearts.
However, if you tell these things to your relatives at home, you will inevitably continue to magnify things, and others will take them everywhere to say as talking points after tea, and very few people will really think about you. The more you talk about it, the more negative the impact.
Maybe from the side of some people, just want to vent the emotions in your heart, so that the mood can also be better, occasionally talk about it is certainly no problem, but you can't always take it out and say it. Moreover, when you are spitting on each other, you are actually talking about yourself, don't forget, the two of you are a community at this time, the other party's face is also your face, you are unhappy, you take it out and say, when outsiders evaluate, most of them will also carry a kind of examination and measurement of you.
Over time, you will inevitably appear in your circle of relatives and friends as a weak image, and once this impression is finally established, it will more or less affect the attitude of others towards you.
02. The economic income of the family;
The economic income of a family can determine too many things, to put it bluntly, this is your face, but also the subconscious standard for outsiders to judge personal ability.
Talking more or less is actually not good.
I know a sister who used to like to complain everywhere that there was no money at home, that she was reluctant to buy that, that she was reluctant to buy, that she was not paid enough, that she needed to be very frugal, that she said too much, and everyone seemed to really dislike her, and even her attitude was not so respectful.
In this regard, it is actually a manifestation of the inferiority of human nature.
Moreover, if your family has more economic income, and you say it in front of your relatives, in the eyes of your relatives, you will more or less think that you are showing off, no matter what your original intention is, you cannot change the perception that someone has about you. Ten thousand steps back, if someone asks you to borrow money because of this, if you don't borrow it at this time, you will definitely offend people, and if you borrow it, you will definitely worry about taking it back.
That being the case, in terms of economic matters, it is best to keep a low profile, no matter how much money you have, you have a number in mind, and you don't have to prove anything to outsiders. In the final analysis, it is king that the two of you have a really good life.
03. The child's achievements;
It's normal for your children to have achievements and you're happy for them, but you really don't think that all your relatives think the same way as you, even your brothers and sisters.
Because you are your own families, it means that no matter how good the relationship was when you were young, you will not belong to the community of interests when you grow up.
In this way, when it comes to each other's interests, it is certain that their respective hearts will be completely different.
Your child in the strict sense, can be divided into your interests, when you talk about this, your relatives' knee-jerk reaction, most of them are compared with their own children, if not as good as your children, people must be uncomfortable, and even have some jealous thoughts, if they are better than your children, the other party will definitely say it to fight back, say more, lest they will be sword-rattling.
Therefore, if the child has achieved something, you are happy in your heart, don't take it out and say it everywhere, and you can't wait to use a loudspeaker to broadcast.
Moreover, life is impermanent, many things can not be said by anyone, if you say it too early, so as not to punch yourself in the face later.
04. The shortcomings of the other party;
Whether in love or marriage, this is definitely a taboo in intimate relationships.
No one is perfect, if two people are together, it is certainly impossible to do everything, and there are places on the other side that you are not accustomed to, which is really normal, but what you should think at this time is how to solve the problem? If you are not yet married, at this time you have to rethink the possibility of the continuation of your relationship, if you are married, and because of practical reasons can not make a big change, you have to learn to convince yourself to compromise, more to see its advantages, rather than staring at the shortcomings have been.
If so, the person you end up embarrassed about is only yourself.
Because you will always be trapped in this kind of complaining mood, you go around saying that the other party is not good, especially in front of relatives, you think your relatives must be able to empathize, in words, people will definitely comfort you, but the actual heart of the real thoughts, who can say exactly?
If you have not made up your mind to divorce, don't talk about the shortcomings of the other half in front of anyone, if outsiders do not have good intentions, they may even play a role in fanning the flames and making small problems bigger. You will see the other person more and more unpleasant, but in fact it may be that you yourself are too critical.
Always saying that the other half is bad in front of relatives, and there is also a possibility that it will affect the attitude of relatives to your other half.
I know a man who complained about his wife's in front of his sister and mother, and as a result, his sister and mother began to have a hostile psychology, inexplicably targeting her, looking for stubble every three to five, and finally his wife couldn't stand it, so he wanted to divorce, he suddenly panicked, because he didn't think about divorce.
Therefore, you must judge yourself, and some words are said, not only have no effect, but have some counter-effects, which can be said to be more than worth the loss.
Being a person should still have their own opinions, and at the same time, they should also have the awareness of what to say and what not to say, which is not only the attitude that should be in intimate relationships, but also the attitude that must be used in life.
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