01
I used to think that I wouldn't have a second child.
It is said that raising children is a matter of two families, but among the four elderly people in my family, only the child who is not in good health has the ability and willingness to help.
During my month, the child's grandparents sang about my time and I took the initiative to travel to Japan, where the earthquake and tsunami and nuclear leak had just taken place, and at that moment I understood that the only thing I could rely on was my own mother.
The child's grandmother is not a person who is good at getting along with people, coupled with the uneven quality of the nanny, in the two and a half years before the eldest went to kindergarten, the number of nannies in our family can not be counted with ten fingers.
The pain brought to me in the process of giving birth to the boss has faded but has not been forgotten. Artificial water breakage, oxytocin, prolonged labour, hand-turned fetal head, these words are still familiar and sometimes remembered.
And I will never forget the long night of waiting to drive to three fingers, the pain of walking around the corridor like a ghost alone with my stomach covered.
I am a person with a little bit of ambition, and I know very well the impact that having children will have on my career. Not going to work for half a year, adjusting the position after returning to the company, and the efforts of the past few years have all been repeated, and even my career will have a big regression.
Our family is not wealthy, and the money to raise a child is said to be a lot. My husband and I, just ordinary migrant workers in a little fifth-tier cities, found an ordinary job after graduating from college and took a general salary. However, in the descriptions of those who came over, I already knew that raising children requires a large expense.
02
However, there are always such small things that touch me, and after all, I still enter the pit of the second child.
When my daughter was two years old that year, when I was holding her little hand and walking around the neighborhood, she suddenly released my hand and ran to the stroller pushed on the opposite side as usual, looking at the baby lying on the cart. 5 minutes, 10 minutes, Dabao has no intention of leaving. Xiaowa's mother teases her daughter, is it okay to bring the baby home for you? The daughter is now energetic, pushing the car to run home.
That year, my daughter was three years old, and I took her to my colleague's wedding and met my colleague's brother and sister, and the little brother held the little sister's hand. The daughter is envious, and has been asking, mother, when can I have a brother? Mom replied, you will never have a brother. The daughter had to give way, and it was good to have a sister.
That year my daughter was four years old, and my father had a small operation. As the only daughter, I habitually make every decision and deal with everything. Although my father tried his best to complete the formalities that he was able to complete independently, hired a nurse throughout the day, and took annual leave predictably, I was tired enough.
In the same year, my father-in-law was hospitalized for insomnia, arranging hospitalization, formalities, day and night nursing, and my husband and his brother had a discussion and orderly. At that moment, I suddenly realized that my daughter was also an only child, and one day she would have to face everything I was facing today.
03
Yes, the second child is really a big pit.
For two weeks, I could only see my daughter on weekends. When my son was just seven days old, I was renovated upstairs. In order to ensure my son's health, I decided to take my son back to my mother's house. For about two weeks, I could only see my daughter on weekends, often thinking wildly and washing my face with tears.
The problems faced by raising children, all over again. Until the end of my pregnancy, I firmly believed that everything was easy for a second-born mother like me.
However, it was slowly discovered that difficult births, cracked nipples, eczema, not sleeping all night, breast milk diarrhea, mastitis, these problems have been found and have not been found.
The husband, who was once a good helper when he was born dabao, began to show the essence of the pig teammate. Sleep longer than Erbao, who is less than a year old. Lack of patience with Dabao, every time he is urged to tutor Dabao's homework, the final result must be that the two people are unhappy and dispersed.
When I was seven months old, I sent my daughter to dance class for the first time after giving birth, and the dance teacher told me that in the future, you will send your children to dance classes, and the state of your father coming to the children is completely different. So, for about seven months, my husband and I exchanged divisions of labor, and I was mainly responsible for the big treasure, and my husband was mainly responsible for the second treasure.
As a result, after that, I often found that such as brushing the bottle is not clean, the amount of milk powder is arbitrary, the stains on the cloth of the washing mask are still there, and so on. Pig teammates often ask me recently, Erbao is almost one year old, can be weaned. I asked, why? The pig teammate replied that because the feeding time was too long, it was delayed.
For nearly a year, I found myself completely out of myself. As long as I am at home, I am like a robot, always spinning, even on the way to work I have to think about what is still missing at home and buy and buy.
However, I still often feel that there is not enough time, such as not having enough time to practice with Dabao, for example, because the sucking time is not enough time, Erbao is about to leave the milk naturally. Most importantly, I don't seem to be me anymore, no time to think about myself, not even time to wash my face and brush my teeth.
This year, my biggest heartache is my mother. My mother is not in good health, but she still has to help me bring up a child again. The mother is worried about her daughter's money, obviously she is very tired, but she is not willing to ask someone to help.
Mom is upset about her granddaughter, so every Wednesday mom has to take two children alone. As a result, I often saw my mother lying in bed so tired that she didn't want to get up. Whenever this happens, I feel very sorry for my mother.
04
Erbao is almost a year old, and I have no regrets.
That day I asked my daughter if I had any regrets about having a brother? The daughter replied, a little regret, a little no regret.
Regret is because the mother often can't accompany the daughter because she has to take care of her brother; because the grandmother has to take care of the brother, there is no way to pick up the daughter, the daughter has to wait for the mother to pick up, and becomes the last child in the class to be picked up; because there is no one to pick up, the daughter's favorite English class is stopped. I don't regret it a little, because my brother is so cute that I can play with my brother.
So what about myself, do you have any regrets? I don't think I regret it.
When my sister gradually knew that this was my brother and I had to take care of my brother; when my brother smiled when he saw his mother, and when his mother cried when he left; when my brother gradually knew that it was his sister and brother hugging together, I think all this touched all the softness in my heart.
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