I don't know when it started, but there is an internet buzzword called "social terror".
It is generally manifested in the fear of being scrutinized in small groups, once it is found that others pay attention to themselves is unnatural, dare not look up, do not dare to look at people, and even feel that they have no place to be self-contained, do not dare to speak in public, do not dare to sit in front of the assembly, so avoid social interaction, in extreme cases can lead to social isolation.
Common objects of fear are those of the opposite sex, harsh bosses, and fiancés' parents, or acquaintances.
The above paragraph is the official explanation I searched for, I thought that "social fear" is a somewhat spoof word, but in fact, the real "social fear" is accompanied by light or heavy psychological problems.
To understand again, "social terrorism" is a relatively common phenomenon among young people.
China Youth Daily and China Youth School Media conducted a questionnaire survey on "social fear" for college students across the country, and a total of 4854 valid questionnaires from 255 colleges and universities were collected.
According to the survey results, 80.22% of the college students surveyed said that they had mild "social phobia"; 6.90% of the college students surveyed said that they had a relatively serious "social fear"; 0.64% of the college students surveyed said that they had serious "social phobia" and were medically diagnosed with social phobia.
In addition, 12.24% of the college students surveyed said that they were not "socially afraid" at all, calling themselves "social cattle themselves".
Seeing these data, as a professional instinct of an early educator, I naturally thought: Why do so many young children have "social fear"?
By the age of 6, what should parents and educators do to help their children develop this viability?
Back to the current work, first of all, do not rise to the problem of social phobia, the cultivation of children's early social skills, there are still some problems worthy of parents' attention.
Lack of real interaction with people
Many parents think that if you raise your child, don't cry or make trouble, you can leave it alone. Children can play on their own, play on their own, more with some lifeless toys and objects, lack of interaction with people, there is eye contact, there is expression communication, there is physical communication interaction.
In the long run, the child's state will be manifested as talking to himself, feeling that a person is more comfortable and simpler. When there is social interaction, the child does not understand the solution to the problem, resulting in a dislike of the social environment.
The establishment of a child's sense of self
The common denominator of the "social phobia" group is that they do not like the attention and attention of others. The current state of self is invisible, tiny, so small that everyone can't see the best.
In fact, this reflects that the establishment of children's early sense of self has not been fully developed and supported, and has not helped children establish a good self-evaluation system.
Children do not have a sense of self such as "I am good, I am excellent, I am shining, I am unique" and so on.
This is directly related to the parents' excessive discipline, repression, and control of parenting, resulting in children weakening themselves, fearing authority, and unable to develop a strong self.
So choose to close yourself off in your own little world, and once you cross out, you will feel insecure.
Of course, there will also be some innate temperament that belongs to quieter, introverted, and children who like to be alone.
But the difference between "social fear" and quiet personality is that the latter can swim between liveliness and solitude, even in social situations, there will be no discomfort and restraint, and it does not care about other people's opinions.
Such a person has a strong self to help him establish various social relationships.
It is gratifying that more and more parents are beginning to pay attention to the development of their children's early social skills.
Early education centers, childcare centers, children's activity centers, and infant group activities specially organized by parents are all working hard to create a social environment for children to actively participate.
This is not simply to let the child learn to communicate, but to let the child build a fuller self in the environment, learn how to build relationships in the environment, and how to construct themselves in relationships.
I hope that the 0-6-year-old parents will attach importance to the high-quality companionship of their children and give their children full respect, choice and discourse.
Helping children establish a complete self-evaluation system and build a strong self is an important foundation for children's social development.
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