Children are teachers of adults, and this is not wrong at all.
In many things, the child's ability far exceeds me, "the back wave of the Yangtze River pushes the front wave, and the front wave dies on the beach" is really a reasonable saying. I'm already lying flat on the beach struggling!
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1
The child cares more about me than he cares about himself
A few days ago, I went to the school to pick up Cute more than school, and when I saw that the little guy was very happy, I opened my arms and prepared to hug him. "Come, Mommy hug!"
CuteDo was so excited, jumping in place, one didn't pay attention, and the little head hit my chin. I was momentarily confused, and the good mood of wanting to hug him shattered to the ground, and all that was left was unbearable pain and anger.
"Ah!" I screamed, covered my chin tightly with my hand, and looked at Cute Duo with a grudge on my face.
Cute realized that her overexcitement had hurt me, and touched her head with her hand, a little embarrassed. Seeing my expression of pain, he immediately came up to me with concern and asked, "Mom, are you okay, is it painful?" I'm sorry, I didn't mean it. Let me knead it for you! After saying that, he reached out and tried to stroke it for me.
"No, I'll just rub it myself." The child is so sensible, I have no good intention of blaming him for his inadvertent mistakes, but I have been immersed in the pain of my own flesh.
Illustrations from the picture book "Rock Scissors Cloth" series
Then it occurred to me that the forces acted on each other. How much my jaw hurt, how much the child's head hurt. I was so concerned about myself that I forgot to ask the child. "Does your head hurt?"
Cute grinned shyly and touched her head, "It doesn't hurt, it doesn't hurt so much." Seeing that I wasn't angry, his face slowly relaxed. I was a little distressed, my son cared more about me than he cared about himself, I was so selfish!
When the pain in his jaw eased, I opened my arms and hugged him again, "Well, Mommy doesn't hurt anymore, Mommy hugs you!" But this time, don't jump suddenly, Mom can't stand the next blow. ”
"Okay." Cute let go of the guilt and tension in her heart and threw herself into my arms full of joy.
The cute man in the cotton coat was a little heavy to hold, and I held his big ass with both hands and instructed, "You put your hands around your mother's neck, otherwise your mother is afraid that she will not be able to hold you, and you will "pounce" and fall down." ”
Cute Duo obediently held out her hand, but the first time was not to put her arms around my neck, but to gently stroke the wound I had just been hit, "Mom, do you still hurt?" ”
2
Never skimp on praise and encouragement
"Wow, Mom, the meal you made today was delicious!" You are truly the best chef in the world. ”
"Mom, you're the best essay writer in the world!"
"You're the best mom in the world, better than all the moms!"
"Mom, why are you so powerful, anything?"
"Mom, the cookies you made are delicious, they're so delicious!"
These are cute and usually fancy spiritual rewards for me.
Cute is a particularly warm and innocent child, he will never skimp on praise and encouragement to others.
When I eat a delicious meal or snack, I will praise my cooking skills; I will praise my cooking skills when I successfully completed a manuscript at home today; I think of my classmates who envy the good mother I have, I can't help but come up and kiss it, and immediately offer sweet words, "Mom, the person I love the most in this world is you." ”
The child's affirmation and encouragement made me feel confident, and for a moment I really thought that I was very powerful.
Maybe that's what spiritual encouragement does!
In contrast, I did not have so much affirmation and encouragement for him, always afraid of praising too much, and the child would be proud and complacent.
As adults, we should really learn from our children how to praise others frankly and sincerely.
3
Always so energetic
I don't know how everyone's children are, in short, our family's cute and much energy is very exuberant, and every day seems to have endless energy.
A family of three went to the playground to play, my father and I took turns to play with each other has long been exhausted, dizzy, cute but wiped a handful of sweat with his hands, understated to say, "I haven't played enough, do it again!" ”
The family is idle at home, everyone sits or lies down to rest, cute but always tossing. Either flipping around in bed, jumping on the couch, assembling all kinds of small objects with toys to poke the ceiling, or hiding behind curtains and in the closet to play peek-a-boo with us. Children will always find something for themselves to do.
To coax a child with such great energy, it is really comparable to ascending to the sky, it is too difficult!
The child before the age of 3 was slightly better, lying next to him for a while and falling asleep. Children after the age of 3, but not! Even if the curtains are closed to create a dim and quiet bedtime atmosphere, he will still jump around like a loach, one will sit up and say that he wants to read a book, one will jump up and say that he wants to play with toys, one will arch to look at the scenery outside the window, one will cock his ass to perform a twisted ass dance...
You can never guess what your child wants to do, anyway, he won't sleep. Coaxing and coaxing, every time it was me, the sleeper who coaxed myself to fall asleep first!
Illustration from "Do We All Want to Sleep?" " Picture book inside page
"Do we all have to sleep?" " is a particularly real old mother sleeping picture book, every time I read with the cute multi-parent, I can't help but sigh, "This scene is too real, I am this sleepy worm mother, you are the son who refuses to sleep." Every time I put my mind to sleep, it always ended in failure! ”
4
Imaginative imagination
Speaking of imagination, I am really willing to bow to the wind, cute and mostly is definitely the existence of the king of our family, no one can beat.
On the way to school, when he put the document bag on his head to block the rain, he touched the hanging zipper pull on the document bag and said that he was wearing a teacher's hat (actually a doctor's hat); when assembling programming toys at home, he did not play cards according to common sense, assembled a set of dumbbells by himself, ran to me to perform hard weightlifting; when eating bananas, he suddenly put two bananas on his head, pretended to become a bull, put bananas on his neck for a while, pretended to wear banana bibs...
Use the engine programming blocks to form two dumbbells and perform tough weightlifting.
Seeing the ever-changing blue sky and white clouds in the sky, one moment saying that the clouds are like a big fish, the other saying that the clouds are like rough seas, and the other saying that the clouds are like the fields cultivated by the peasant uncle.
The picture on the left shows the blue sky and white clouds we see, and the picture on the right is "Do You All Want to Sleep?" The boy imagined the big fish spaceship in it.
On the way out of school a few days ago, Cute Duo looked up and saw the strangely shaped white clouds in the blue sky, and quickly pointed it out to me, "Mom, you look quickly, there are fish in the sky!" ”
When I looked at it, it was really, exactly the same as the shape of a fish.
This reminds me of "Do We All Want to Sleep?" " inside the scene. The boy pointed to the sky and told his mother that there was a fish-shaped spaceship in the sky to pick up the aliens to come home, but the mother looked up at the window and did not find the fish-shaped spaceship in the child's eyes, but just muttered, "Okay, the curtains are also open, right?" I pulled it up. ”
Fortunately, I did not fall asleep, did not miss, really saw the fish flying in the sky, and recorded the imagination of the child in the form of pictures.
In the child's eyes, the door slit is a twisted and deformed door slit; in the mother's eyes, the door slit is just a straight and ordinary door slit
In "Do We All Want to Sleep?" For the first time, I understood the child, the first time I understood what the child was thinking when he refused to sleep.
It turns out that the world in the eyes of children and the world in the eyes of adults are really completely different. We really should learn from our children how to cultivate their imagination and let it flourish.
5
Nuanced observation
Every time I read more picture books with Cute, Cute Always finds some picture details and misread words that I have not noticed in the process of listening to stories, refreshing my understanding of children's concentration and observation.
Or is it based on the picture book "Is Everybody Going to Sleep?" " for example.
Comparison of the boy's fantasy world and the real world
Originally thought that this was just a picture book story of sleeping, but in the process of listening to the story, Cute Found that the red pen on the roof of the fantasy world and the chimney in the real world correspond to each other. The items such as trains, pens, alarm clocks, glass beads, post boxes, fish ships, and airplanes that appear in the fantasy world have also appeared in the previous article, which are transformed from the boy's real-life toys.
When we find this point, we will find it one by one, and we will reveal the other side of picture book reading - it has become a game picture book for concentration training, which is particularly interesting to play!
Looking at these two pictures, the picture above is two dinosaurs crying, and the caption is "... Who is the lost child? "The picture below shows two small dinosaurs finding their mother and finding their own home.
I take it for granted that these two crying dinosaurs are lost children.
Cute but questioned, he believes that the dinosaur in the picture above and the dinosaur mother in the picture below are the same size, and the difference between the body shape of the dinosaur baby is too large, so the above picture should be the dinosaur mother.
Therefore, we can only determine whether the two dinosaurs are dinosaur babies or dinosaur mothers by looking up the details.
Pterodactyls are still easier to recognize, and the color difference between the necks of pterosaur mothers and pterosaur babies is more obvious, and we unanimously agree that the pterosaurs appearing in the above picture are babies.
Triceratops is difficult to judge, and there is no particularly obvious difference in appearance.
I'll use the proportion of baby Triceratops to boy's body. And the dinosaur mother has a dark green stripe in the middle of the body, and the dinosaur baby does not, so as to determine that the dinosaur baby appears in the above picture. However, since the dinosaur in the picture above only has sides, this statement is not very agreeable.
But later, he looked at it himself and found the clue. "Mom, the mother of the Triceratops has four protruding horns on her cheeks, and the front Triceratops has only two horns on her face, and he is a baby Triceratops!"
I didn't find it, the child found it all, this visual search competition, I lost very thoroughly!
6
Play is learning
For young children, play is learning, and what they are best at is learning in the form of games, rather than sitting down to read and write.
Even if they read books, they will never read rigorous and rigid picture books. Brain-opening, bizarre fantasy stories, or full of life, can let children find picture books with their own shadows, and can most arouse children's interest in reading.
Illustration from "Open the Eyes of Adults' Children's Books"
Take the cute children's books that you love to read as an example. He did not like to read the textbook-like "100,000 Whys" (the sixth edition), but he liked to watch the cute and lively "Zhihu Edition of 100,000 Whys". He doesn't like to read dietary health books with a particularly obvious didactic style, but he loves "Patrick Eats Beans" in the "International Awards Comic Book Learning English". Because the picky eater, mischievous, afraid of the dark, always helped Patrick let him see himself in life.
He does not like to write math problems, but he likes to play Sudoku toys, commissary games, dice counting and other mini-games.
This is the child.
"If your mom and dad are always nagging, let you read more books that are useful for learning..." "You can tell them that reading is very helpful for learning!" "Even the teachers are often in class, reading to everyone. Her eyes lit up as she read! ”
I feel the same way about this passage in "Open the Eyes of Adults' Children's Books".
Many times, for the sake of test scores, we as parents always unconsciously urge our children to read more useful books and less useless books. As everyone knows, the "useless book" in the eyes of adults can bring unlimited happiness and beauty to children.
This joy is priceless.
Only when children continue to experience joy and happiness from reading will they truly fall in love with reading and develop the good habit of reading anytime and anywhere.
In "Open the Eyes of Adults' Children's Books", parents can't understand the obscure poem "Caged Bird", and the child directly draws a picture of a caged bird, and the protagonists in the cage are father and mother
As parents, when we choose books for our children, we should not be limited to useful and famous books, but should focus on whether the children love to read or not.
As parents, when children do not love to learn and do not love to write homework, we should reflect on whether there is a problem with the current way of learning.
If children can experience the joy of play in learning all the time, I think no child will refuse to learn.
7
Express real emotions
Since becoming an adult, I have rarely cried, and I always unconsciously restrain the urge to cry when I am wronged.
Tears represent weakness. And I don't want to show weakness.
I love even more. He is very restrained in his emotions and never easily reveals himself in front of outsiders. He even asked Cute Duo not to cry without moving, "Boys have tears and don't flick."
However, children can't be as restrained as adults, they cry when they are angry, they cry when they are wronged, they cry when they are hurt, they cry when they get lost, and they cry when they do something wrong. They show the world their true emotions all the time.
Because of this cry, their bad emotions come and go quickly!
Illustration from "Will You Cry? 》
Will You Cry? It is about a little boy who is separated from his parents and thinks about whether to cry.
If the terrible monster is like me, alone in a strange place, will he cry?
If the fierce big bad wolf was like me, alone in a strange place, would he cry?
If a powerful samurai were like me, alone in a strange place, would he cry?
If a terrible ghost were like me, alone in a strange place, would he cry?
Thinking and deciding what to do by imagining other people in the same situation is a child's mindset.
Last year, when I took Cute Duo to a large playground to play, I also experienced a situation where mother and child were missing. Seeing the lonely figure of the boy in the picture, I suddenly traveled back to that terrible moment.
At that time, I was in tears of panic, my head was blank, and I even forgot to call my lover in time to let him come and find the child together. Later, when the missing child was found with the help of the staff, Cute Duo did not cry and scream, but also silently wept with red eyes.
Suddenly unable to find a parent, how panicked, how scared, how lonely the child's heart should be! Until now, the shadow of the missing event is naturally engraved in the mind of the cute and long-lasting.
I thought that if Cute Duo had cried loudly like the boy in the picture, maybe he would have been able to vent his fears, loneliness, and sadness in time.
So now, sometimes cute is more wronged, hurt or frustrated, I will also guide him, "Cry, cry, just cry out all the unhappiness in your heart!" ”
Sometimes there aren't enough tears, and I encourage him to drink more water, urinate more, and "get rid of his unhappiness by tearing, peeing, and farting." ”
This method has been tried and tested, and it is cute and believed in it. In fact, it is just that after a long time, unhappiness will be slowly forgotten.
Children live in the hearts of "childish", they do not think that everything in this world is decided, full of questions about everything, and give full play to their imagination.
When he sees a cup, he will not simply think that it is a cup, but will think that it may be an alien disguise; when he sees an umbrella, he will not think that it is just an umbrella, but will think that it is a black-robed monster with a big head doll; when he sees a blooming flower, he will not just think that it is a flower, and the upward bloom is a super loudspeaker, radar, blooming downwards, spinning is the electric fan in our house.
Whether it is school education or family education, as adults, we should strive to overcome the anxiety of wanting to cultivate children into adults as soon as possible, carefully care for the "childishness" in children's hearts, and wait for them to grow naturally and bloom their own light of life.
Finally, share a poem with everyone.
"A Little Kid"
Haysan
A small child, if he is clean
Dress neatly, if he is well behaved
That's not a good thing
If he opens his mouth
It is uncle good aunt good goodbye goodbye hello
If he was four years old he could make pears
What's the point of that?
A small child should be rolling around on the ground
Running around the streets, his face and hands dirty
It should also be a little bad, a little disobedient
He should have been playing aimless games for a long time
He was a selfish, cute and cruel little creature
He came into the world to educate us
Let us grow again
Instead of decaying