Zhang Hua, the son of Boss Zhang of Hengshui, is in his third year of high school and will have 6 months to take the college entrance examination. Academic performance is average, but after all, it is a famous school like Hengshui No. 2 Middle School, although it is only in the ordinary class, but many students in the class can be admitted to 985 University every year, and even occasionally one or two students can be admitted to Qingbei.
Boss Zhang, who has been in the business all his life, is also full of hope for his son. Although he also knows that the goal set by the teacher for the child is to impact the 211 University, he still hopes that the child can take the 985 college, or even Qingbei. After thinking about it for a long time, is there any way to make the child's academic performance improve by leaps and bounds, and get a qualitative breakthrough in the last six months? Thinking about it, Boss Zhang had a conversation with his child during the New Year's Day holiday. He took the most direct and stimulating approach, material rewards.
"As long as you are admitted to 985 University, I will reward you with 100,000 yuan," Boss Zhang said to his son, "and I will give all laptops and Apple mobile phones." In Lao Zhang's view, this reward is simply astronomical for his son who lives in school every month and has no pocket money.
But I didn't expect the child to stare at him for half a day and said: Can it be practical? Why don't you say that I was admitted to Qingbei to give me 500,000, don't say 500,000, and I can't pass the 5 million. And when did you keep your promises? Admitted to Heng'er, said to buy me a new mobile phone, and gave me the rest. Say that the final grades can improve, take me to the Jiuzhaigou I want to go to the most, the result is that my rank has risen by 5 places, you told me to help me apply for a cram school during the holidays, time conflicts, take me to Hengshui Lake for a day trip. What you can't do, you want to achieve in me, is it possible?
Hearing the child's words, Boss Zhang was silent for a while and said sarcastically: I am actually for your own good.
The son replied, "Yeah, I know, so I'm going to be what I'm going to be." After saying that, he went back to his room, leaving Lao Zhang confused for half a moment.
First, keeping promises is a very important part of parents' education of their children
Material stimulation may have an effect, but the lack of fulfillment of promises is the biggest problem, and many parents really make casual promises when educating their children. Without the slightest regard for whether you can achieve it, or something that could easily keep your promise, you find various reasons to prevaricate.
These parents think that their children will forget in a few days, but they may not forget it for the rest of their lives.
A parent did a good job, he told me that once he forgot why he promised to buy milk tea for his children, and it turned out that after 10 o'clock in the evening, all the shops were closed. Finally, in order to keep the promise with the child, I made some tea leaves, boiled with milk, and gave it to the child as milk tea, and the child smiled happily, and the next day he came back from work and bought three cups of milk tea for his wife to share with himself and the child. Children will definitely be happy if they do it, but children will definitely be sad if they can't do it.
This kind of education also lets children know not to promise at will, to know what can be done and what cannot be done. Even the formation of the personality of future children can have a profound impact.
Second, material rewards should be measured
In many cases, material rewards are effective, but material rewards cannot be allowed to flood. For example, there is a parent whose child is particularly fond of writing homework, and every time he writes homework, he procrastinates. Finally, parents will reward 5 yuan for completing homework on time in the form of material rewards to promote their children to complete their homework.
It started out working, but after less than 1 week, it was back to its old ways. Because the child feels that he has saved enough money, he returns to normalcy.
My advice to him is that you can use this way, but the payment period should be extended, such as once a week, so that the child can develop a habit, so that it can help not complete the homework.
You know, children are minors, the ability to distinguish things is still growing, their values and worldview have not taken shape, if parents mislead their children, it is possible for children to pay a price for their whole life. While using material incentives for children, it is more important to pay attention to spiritual encouragement. The material rewards are short-lived, but the spiritual incentives allow the child to remember for a long time. However, spiritual encouragement requires parents to be more attentive, more laborious, and more difficult to do. But these difficulties are exchanged for better results of spiritual rewards for children's growth.
Parents are the child's first teacher, but also their role model, parents themselves can be honest and trustworthy, so that the child will most likely grow into an honest and enterprising person.
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