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Secular has secular norms, morality has moral norms, and some of these norms may not apply to modern society, but there are always some norms that apply.
When it comes to secular norms and moral codes, some people take it for granted that they are disgusted, and always want to flaunt what they do by breaking the worldly norms, as if they are right and everyone else is wrong.
The so-called "no rules, no squares", the rules are all kinds of norms. There is an indisputable fact that the norms that the vast majority of people follow are things that exist, that is, reasonable things, and violations of these norms can be said to be wrong. The dividing line between right and wrong is artificial, but as long as most people recognize it, it is reasonable.
Cohabitation before marriage is a normal thing, if it is just a normal love affair, not mixed with any chaotic situations of S life, it is normal behavior. If someone goes on the line and says that it is not normal for others to have cohabitation under normal love before marriage, it can only mean that these people themselves are not normal. And if premarital cohabitation is based on the chaos of S life, others should dislike you because you are violating the norms that most people follow.
Just a reader left a message about the problem between him and his fiancée, involving the problem of cohabitation before marriage, in general, it is not his fault, it is all her fiancée's fault, let's listen to what he said.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" > Donglin teacher, hello:</h1>
This Spring Festival of mine has really had a lot of twists and turns. When I went back years ago, I was worried that I would be urged to marry and afraid of going on a blind date. Later, when there was an epidemic and I didn't let me go out, I thought I could avoid the blind date, but I only hid for a few days, and then I went on a blind date.
Our hometown side does not attach too much importance to the epidemic, everyone seems to be fine, what should they do. I couldn't help my parents, so I had to obediently accept the blind date.
This blind date was a surprise to me, because the woman was very beautiful, the kind of sweet-looking woman, and it felt good after a short chat, and my parents made up their own minds to say that they wanted to get engaged.
As a result, just the day before the engagement, I had a sunny thunderbolt, which was simply: my fiancée had a relationship with a man in our village, and that man was the kind of person who was a little jerk, and soon it reached me and my parents. According to the man, my fiancée S had a messy life and not only had a relationship with him, but with a lot of men and had many cohabitation experiences.
As far as I know about my parents, if only they knew about this, they would pretend to be deaf and dumb. However, the whole village knew about it, and they couldn't hang on their faces, so they immediately called and said that they wanted to repent. As a result, the woman's parents did not hesitate to come to the door directly and quarreled with my parents.
My mother reiterated that she could not stand that the woman had lived with someone else before marriage, and the woman's mother said:
"How is it that my daughter is cleaner than your son, and my daughter's living with others shows that she is attractive, what kind of goods do you see your son?" If you say that your son has never lived with anyone else, it only means that he is a waste and does not deserve my daughter at all! I have a good intention to marry my daughter to your son, and you are good, with the intention of humiliating our family.
Don't blame me for not reminding you that your son's waste is only worthy of marrying a woman who has lived with someone else, otherwise he may not even know how to have children! My daughter has a lot of emotional experience, naturally very experienced, and there are more men who want to marry her, there is no need to marry your son!'
My mother naturally did not accept the woman's mother to humiliate her son in public, the two people quarreled more and more fiercely, and finally the woman came to me and said, "I have lived with others before marriage, indicating that I am charming, and you ugly man is not worthy of me", and then pulled her mother away.
They were gone, our family was in trouble, and although the neighbors around me were trying to persuade my mother to calm down, I could clearly see the ridicule and contempt in their tones and expressions.
I now just want to get back to work as soon as possible and leave home as soon as possible, I am really fed up, and the atmosphere in my hometown really makes me very uncomfortable.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" > Donglin Xiting emotional suggestion:</h1>
Reading the above man's self-statement, people inexplicably feel painful, although the two families quarreled fiercely, but from the beginning to the end, the most seriously injured was him.
Although his mother's blind urging and blindly engaging him was problematic, the problem was even greater in comparison with the woman and her mother. Obviously, a phone call can repent of marriage, have to quarrel in public, and finally who loses people knows who knows.
If everything he said about the woman is true, then her problem is really not small, her life is chaotic and arrogant, the family is this virtue, can only be said to be the upper beam is not the lower beam crooked, the family is not a good bird.
As we said earlier, if it is just normal love and cohabitation, it is no problem. But if you live with people randomly on the premise of S life chaos, it is problematic. If this kind of person doesn't think he's wrong and throws dirty water on you, there's really no need to be polite to her.
Yesterday, I saw someone on the Internet discussing this kind of S life chaos, and one of the people in this area gave such a statement, "I have more boyfriends and more times I live together, in order to get married in the future and better serve my husband, this is not a bad thing, it is a good thing!" ”
Only people who are also chaotic in their lives will agree with this brazen statement, which is clearly putting gold on their faces, clearly trying to whitewash themselves, and this kind of dirty and messy person is not worthy of anyone's love. They can be irresponsible to themselves, but if you want to marry a normal person, you must stay away from this rotten person.
What do you think of the man above's fiancée?