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There will always be all kinds of problems in the process of parenting, but even if we clearly know that we must be guided positively when facing these problems, there will be times when we get out of control and collapse.
Especially for those children's "repeated teaching" behavior, it is really crazy!
The 6-year-old child still pulls the "rice dumpling" in his pants
This is the personal experience of a mother on the Internet, for which she has been troubled for several years, although it is a little special, I think it is very inspiring for everyone.
Her eldest son Niu Niu (pseudonym), originally broke the diaper when he was 2 and a half years old, and he would take the initiative to tell his family in advance, but at the age of 4, he suddenly refused to go to the toilet, and the stool was directly pulled into his pants!
What's more exaggerated is that children will also hide their stool in different corners of the home, under the sofa, next to the bookshelf...
This is not to mention, at the age of 6, seeing that she is about to leave kindergarten and go to primary school, she still pulls the "rice dumpling" in the pants, and the hard work of bathing and washing the pants of the child is secondary, and she is afraid of whether the child has any physical problems.
Mom's collapse was only exchanged for a worsening of the situation
Adhering to the principle of "scientific parenting", at first she not only patiently guided the child positively, but also took the initiative to find the reason for the child's regression in the toilet.
She thinks that the child's nature is to play, the son must be because the time to defecate on the toilet is too boring to refuse repeatedly, so she uses the game to attract the child's attention, the son crouches in the pit, she reads the picture book next to her, and will personally play a piece of, but in the end it is only a sentence: Mom, I can't pull it out!
After thinking about it again, she also wondered if her son would be an anal desire period, but Baidu found that her son's age was obviously inconsistent with the anal desire period, and later she thought that it might be related to the brother of the second child, and wanted to win the attention of her family by pulling stool.
So, she poured more time into her eldest son, but his son did not change in the slightest.
After eliminating all the various reasons that can be thought of, in desperation, the family unanimously decided to take Niu Niu to the children's hospital for a specialist examination, but the test results showed that there was no problem!
After trying and failing, her mentality finally collapsed completely, and once she directly rubbed the stool on her son's bare legs.
But this collapse of the mother only brought about a worsening of the situation. After a few months, she decided to let go of herself, let go of her son, and live peacefully with the star people, but she didn't expect that it wouldn't be long before her son returned to normal!
Regularity of the child's excretion and development
In fact, the development of children's urinary control system is staged, and if we want to give children the correct guidance of toilet behavior, we must understand their developmental laws.
Phase 1:
When the baby is just born, the control system of urination and defecation has not yet been formed, so the defecation behavior is uncontrolled, natural, they want to pull whenever they want, parents despite the need to prepare diapers on the line.
Stage 2:
As your baby ages, your baby's neuroreflection system begins to build, and your brain receives tension from a full bladder that makes you feel like you're going to urinate.
Also, during this period, the baby's language development and physical sensations match, so they will tell their parents that they want to defecate.
Stage 3:
The main test is the baby's ability to hold, they want to know the maximum capacity of their bladder and rectum, the child must hold back until they really can't hold back, pee their pants, will understand that when this feeling occurs, it is to pee the pants, this is the tipping point of defecation, they have to remember this feeling.
Stage 4:
It is to find the feeling of the first few minutes before the crash, because with this feeling you need to find the bathroom, and you have to take off your pants before you can defecate, so the child should find the feeling of the first few minutes and remember.
Children master the skills of defecation is time-consuming, do not find that children pee pants, pull pants, just blindly blame, scold children, should be gentle handling.
If your child has problems with bowel movements, you should do this in addition to anxiety
Of course, each parent's view of parenting is different, and there are many parents who first consider the physiological reasons of their children when facing their children's regression in the toilet. They will take the child to the doctor, consult what causes it, and then think about other causes after ruling out the factors of the disease;
Secondly, parents consider whether there is a problem with the child's toilet habits, whether there is a conscious cultivation of children's toilet habits, such as telling them to pee, defecation to go to the bathroom, or seek parental help, every once in a while to remind the child to go to the toilet is a good way;
Finally, parents should consider the psychological reasons of their children, and do not frequently scold and accuse children because of their young age, which will have an impact on their children's psychology. Gently tell them: It's okay, it's a big deal, let's change another pair of pants.
Little children will also have self-esteem! If we neglect their self-esteem because of their age, it is often more detrimental to solving the problem of children pulling their pants.
Learning is endless, parenting also needs our deep research, I hope that every parent can find a suitable parenting method for their children on this long road of learning.
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