What should students do when they experience violence on campus? This problem bothers the vast majority of parents, parents think that I do not let my own children bully others, is no one bullying their children? Such an idea is good, but it underestimates the "evil" of some minors.
Professor Li Meijin of Chinese Min Public Security University once said: School violence is a problem facing the world, and it is a high incidence of child violence in children's adolescence, that is, from the late primary school to the middle school stage.
Surveys have shown that the incidence of bullying among primary and secondary school students is as high as 32.4%, of which language bullying is the main form of campus bullying.
First of all, what is school bullying? And what are the characteristics?
School bullying is an act of asymmetry, and the attack can only be considered bullying if the attacker is physically, powerfully, or socially superior to the victim. It is mainly divided into the following two aspects:
Verbally:
Take insulting nicknames, or use humiliating words
Mocking Sarcasm (Yin and Yang Weirdness)
Spread rumors about others
Threatening, intimidating, and forcing others to do things they don't want to do
Extortion and interference with other people's personal property
Behaviorally:
Deliberate neglect: Treating you as a transparent person in a group, or interrupting others when they try to communicate with you
Gather others together to exclude and isolate you
Violence, physical assault: The most common form of bullying in schools, but it is often considered "normal for children to play and make trouble"
School bullying is often a habitual behavior that is highly likely to recur.
When children face school bullying, how should parents communicate with their children? What should parents do when their children are bullied in school? Xiaobian has sorted out these suggestions.
1
Pay attention to children's education, and do not bully the small with the big
Teach children not to take the initiative to bully others, this is a tutoring problem, to let children know that what can not be done, the more powerful the more can not bully the weak.
Every case of campus violence, in terms of public opinion, the vast majority is aimed at the parents of students, the goal is directly pointed to the problem of tutoring, we can also see that many from the school is a jerk, to the society also do, and finally went to prison, this situation is not uncommon.
Parents should rationally guide the growth of children, if it is not clear how to educate children, you can read more relevant books, scientific parenting is better than educating children according to their own ideas.
Many school violence is inseparable from tutors, students' roads have taken a turn, and parents have a large part of the responsibility.
2
Strengthen your child's physique and learn to protect yourself
The child's physique is strong, others do not dare to bully casually, and this is inseparable from sports, inseparable from some self-defense skills, if the family conditions are not allowed, you can often take the child to do sports, if the family conditions are good, you can report some taekwondo, fighting sanda and other training classes, learn some self-defense techniques.
Self-protection, not only to have a strong physique and self-defense skills, but more importantly, self-defense awareness. That is, do not join in the fun and avoid the existing risks. Even if you have learned taekwondo, sanda and other self-defense techniques, you must avoid conflicts with people, win the battle, the other party enters the hospital, you need to compensate for medical expenses, and even be detained. If you lose, you lie in the hospital, and the other party spends money to compensate, no matter how it is calculated, it is a loss-making business.
To learn martial arts, we are for self-defense, in order not to be bullied by others, not to bully others. When encountering someone who takes the initiative to provoke and is forced to fight, but pay attention to the scale, and when the other party is more than one person or has a murder weapon in his hand, he can run and run, do not let yourself be in danger, run, and there is no shame.
3
Help your child deal with bullying incidents
If parents find that their children have been bullied and have injuries on their bodies, they must first control their emotions and understand the whole thing with their children with a peaceful attitude as much as possible.
Let the child explain the origin of the matter clearly, whether it is the process of fighting, or verbal abuse, one by one, and reasonably guide the child to vent the grievances and fears, so as not to cause other consequences due to excessive repression.
Then, analyze the seriousness of the matter, and take pictures of the injured part and send it to the teacher to understand the situation in time. Then ask the child's handling opinions, telling the child that if the parents need to come forward, then the parents have the responsibility.
On the one hand, he gives the choice to the child, and on the other hand, he is given enough security.
If it is really malicious bullying, you must not swallow your anger, vicious school violence can never be terminated with an apology.
The parents of the victims can ask the teacher for leave to take the child to do the injury appraisal first, and then report to the police with evidence, so that the school and the other parents are aware of the seriousness of the matter through legal channels.
And it is best to let the abusive party issue a letter of guarantee in front of the police, to ensure that there will be no similar situation in the later stage, otherwise legal responsibility will be pursued, and the other party's children and parents must sign and confirm.
4
Pay attention to children's psychological counseling
Xu Guangxing, vice president of the China Juvenile Delinquency Prevention Research Association and professor of psychology at East China Normal University, believes that for the bullied, if the psychological level is not timely counseled, they may fall into two extremes: falling into depression and unable to extricate themselves, or even suicidal thoughts; or looking for a target weaker than themselves, transferring emotions to the weak, and the bullied become a new round of bullying. It is conceivable to deal with campus bullying, focusing on psychological counseling, and the following counseling methods are for reference only:
Help children vent their suppressed emotions and prompt them to learn to effectively deal with and regulate their emotions.
Improve children's self-esteem and self-confidence, help children re-establish a positive and positive self-image, and gradually form a correct outlook on life.
Teach children how to deal effectively with bullying in school.
Strengthen parent-child communication and establish good emotional connections.
The school is equipped with a professional psychological counselor to help children with psychological counseling.
Finally, I would like to say to parents, please be sure to believe in your children, if your children are beaten at school, or are charged protection fees, please pay attention to it, and hope that the law will severely punish all perpetrators, and hope that the parents of victims can also stand up bravely, although we cannot fight violence with violence, but we cannot bear to swallow this unhealthy trend.
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Editor of the First Educational Content Team