The neighbor's Xiaomei is a shy and shy girl who does not like to "show her face", such as always following other people's butts when queuing home after school, and will not refute and resist when she is wronged.
Xiaomei's father is a grumpy person, and as soon as the anger comes up, he can't help but want to throw it out, so the neighbors often hear Xiaomei's father yelling at Xiaomei at home, but he has never heard Any echo from Xiaomei.
Later, when listening to Xiaomei's mother, I learned that every time Xiaomei's father killed Xiaomei, Xiaomei didn't say anything, she would go back to the room to write homework, and sometimes Xiaomei's mother went in to comfort Xiaomei, and Xiaomei was not willing to say anything more.
And when I get home, I don't interact with my family much, I don't go to the community to play with other children, and I write my homework as soon as I get home.
Xiaomei's mother sometimes wants to talk to Xiaomei about her recent school life, whether she has made new friends, whether she has encountered any difficulties, and wants to talk to Xiaomei about her heart, xiaomei just said to her mother, "All is good."
Then she followed her mother to do housework, not raising her own dissatisfaction and not saying what she wanted, so Xiaomei looked like a very mature look at a young age, and at the same time became a sensible child in the mouth of adults.
But Xiaomei's mother is very distressed about her daughter, and she would rather not have such a sensible thing.
Xiaomei's understanding of things is actually not really understanding, but a sense of inferiority that seeps into the bones, so what kind of understanding is not worthy of parents' pride?
Never disobey, do everything with parental consent
Children in everyone's eyes are mostly naughty, and with a little rogue, such children have released their own nature, parents from the child's two or three years old to know how to make trouble, you have to face a variety of negotiation processes with children.
For example, do not buy this toy, do not eat this ice cream, and even which clothes to wear, you have to fight with the child.
Most parents will be able to relax their management on some playful issues, but when it comes to principle issues, they will definitely firmly defend sovereignty and cannot break the rules!
But some parents are different, no matter what problems they face, they do not allow others to challenge their decisions, regardless of whether the other party proposes it or not.
Even their own children will only use the sentences "We are all for your own good", "You are so small, you know what, I am an adult, I have the final say" to veto, even if the child wants to put forward his own ideas again, he does not dare to say it.
After a long time, the child will become more and more inferior, so that he does not dare to make a decision, before doing anything, he will first seek the opinions of the parents, follow the instructions of the parents, whether the decision is correct or incorrect, and dare not disobey the parents' orders.
Is such a child really sensible? They have gradually lost themselves under the "authority dictatorship" of their parents, and they do not have any ideas of their own, and inferiority is one of their most prominent characteristics.
Restrain desire, do not argue or grab
Some children know how to restrain their desires from a young age, even if they want it again, they will tell themselves that they can't want it, and there are so many beautiful things.
Even if an adult has to face a lot of temptations every day, sometimes there is no way to control himself when facing these temptations, let alone a child?
A small child walks into the mall, faced with a variety of candies and toys, their longing will not be hidden, they want to pestering their parents to buy all kinds of beautiful goods.
This is the nature of the child, although it is not possible to buy him what the child wants, but some parents have planted the seeds of inferiority in the child's heart when they refuse the needs of their children.
Even if the child puts forward reasonable needs to the parents and the child puts forward a wish, the parents do not care whether the child's needs are reasonable or not, whether they can be met, they directly refuse to say "what is fun, what is delicious about this".
Such cold words, even if there is a million enthusiasm will be poured out by this basin of cold water, such a child, because it is difficult to let their desires be satisfied from a young age, slowly the child's ideas are no longer firm, and they will no longer bravely express their wishes.
The seeds of inferiority took root in his heart, and he gradually doubted whether he was entitled to these good things, and when they grew up, a thought popped up in his heart.
When he wants to complete and realize, the voice of the child who was hit and not recognized will appear in his mind, thus giving up his dream.
This kind of "sensible" child always feels that he exudes a mature atmosphere in his usual interactions, and he also knows how to observe words and colors in his communication with people, as if there is a magical, insight ability beyond his own age.
Just like Xiaomei in the text, she will not put forward her own needs, nor will she express her own views, because their ideas have been denied by parents for a long time, and the seed of inferiority in their hearts has long taken root.
If you find that your child is too sensible, you can save it while the child is still young!
Listen to your child's thoughts and opinions
Parents' authority does not need to be displayed all the time, before making a decision, you may wish to discuss with your child and listen to your child's opinions and ideas.
This not only cultivates the child's expression ability but also strengthens the communication between parents and children, so that children have a sense of participation in family decision-making, so that children feel that she is also a member of the family.
Give your child a chance to refute it
Adults and children think differently about problems, and sometimes they tell their children what they think about something and accept the child's rebuttal.
The child's thinking ability is to be taught, and slowly guide her to think and analyze, which will also be of great help to the child in the future.
Appropriately meet the reasonable needs of the child
Everyone yearns for beautiful things, including children, and parents cannot realize every idea of their children.
But parents can encourage their children to use their own labor to obtain some prizes or a certain amount of money to buy the items they want, and properly meet the reasonable needs of their children, so that his inner needs are also met.
Sensible children are loved by everyone, but is your child really sensible, or is it just "sensible"?
This depends on the parents' education methods, every child is an angel from heaven, I hope that every parent will think about whether their own education methods have hurt this little angel!