Many times, in the relationship, seeking fairness is undoubtedly a luxury thing.
In the relationship, if you pay a hundred points of love, you will get a hundred points of love, even if you get ninety-nine points of love, there will not be so many idiot men and women in this world who feel that this life is full of regrets.
Just like You Tanzhi and Zhong Wanqiu in "Tianlong Eight Parts", for the people they love, the affection can not be said to be deep, the payment is not much, the sacrifice is not small, what is the result? It's just a joke.
Why is it that the more affectionate a person is, the harder it is to meet a soul mate? This is a question worth pondering.
Do you know that many people really invest in feelings, pay a lot, but often do not impress their beloved people, but also let their beloved people feel bored, because he does not love deeply enough, the feelings paid are not sincere enough? The core reason is that it does not know how to love, and lacks the ability to love the personality of love.
1. The heart is too soft, meet someone who is not worthy of love, and is unwilling to let go.
People live in the world, emotionally, it is inevitable that they will be confused, meet scumbags and scumbags, such people, not worthy of love.
At this time, what can be done is to let go; what cannot be done is to cling to enlightenment.
Usually people who use emotions too deeply and too much affection will choose to "cling to it" and are unwilling to let go.
It seems that he is too soft in heart, in fact, the reason is not that the romance novel has been seen, nor that the idol drama has been watched too much, but that he is more "fragile" in his bones, afraid that "after this village, there will be no shop", and he feels that he is not worthy of love and is not worthy of someone better than a scumbag, so he is unwilling to let go.
2. Blind faith in "true love is invincible", trying to use love to impress the hard stone.
Of course, there are also some people, who are too soft in heart and have a virgin heart, who try to use love to touch people who are not worthy of love.
"True love" is not invincible, whether it will make the prodigal son turn back, this is to see people, meet people worthy of love, true love is with "magic", can use love to warm each other's hearts to illuminate each other's future, let the prodigal son turn back, let the thin lover become a pity, let the lack of responsibility of people become responsible.
On the contrary, if you meet someone unladylike, the more feelings you give, the more you will eventually be hurt. Some people, who are not hot ice cubes, love to the end, will only let themselves suffer.
Meet a person who is not worthy of love, who uses too much affection, pays a lot of feelings, and often lives a sad life in the end: slowly drying his life for an unworthy relationship, really tired.
3. Abide by emotional morality, love to the fullest grievance, and do not want to let go.
Some people, in love with a person who is not worthy of love, are unwilling to let go because they are too deep in their affection and unwilling to let go, just like the little monkey who reaches out to grab the food in the bottle, because he clenches his fist, it is difficult to retract his hand, and he ends up in the trap of his prey.
Some people, in love with a scumbag who should have been abandoned long ago, are unwilling to let go, not only because of feelings, but also because he has "moral purity", and feels that since he is holding hands with each other, he should hold hands with each other to the end, otherwise he is the Wang Eight Lambs who play with feelings, which is something that morality does not allow him to do.
Just as one person and another person are confused together, they hold the attitude of "marrying a chicken with a chicken and marrying a dog with a dog" and interacting, regardless of whether the other party is worthy of sincerity.
4. Do not know how to be flexible, easy to love in their own way.
In feelings, if the affection is too deep, it is often easier to be swayed by some inherent concepts and patterns of getting along.
He would get along with the other person in the way he felt he was right, and the result: it made the other person feel bored.
If the other party likes to eat the skinless and nucleated longan, but you always stuff the skin in his mouth and the unnucleated longan, and justify your behavior: I love you.
In the eyes of the other party, your love is stupid love, it is bad love. In short, the other party does not feel love, your love is "false love", and your behavior is non-loving behavior.
In the relationship, love a person, but do not know how to be flexible, not good at power change, and finally often make the soul mate feel tired, even if he meets someone worthy of love, in the end he can not keep the soul mate.
5. Instrumentalization, it is easy to live as a "tool person" in feelings.
Emotionally, it is a good thing to use emotion too deeply, at the very least, this is the attitude that love a person should have.
However, using affection deeply and putting feelings first is not a panacea for managing emotional life.
Some people, too deeply, when talking to the opposite sex about love, do not regard themselves as people, only use themselves as "tools", let the other party use, the result will make the other party look down on themselves.
How can such a person talk about charisma? How can you get the respect of the other party and others?
Just like You Tanzhi in "Tianlong Eight Parts", he loves Ah Zi very much, for Ah Zi, he is willing to do anything bad, making himself a "tool" and a "weapon" in Ah Zi's hands.
6. Do not show themselves, only know how to "love and give".
One person wants to impress another, and the main thing is: attraction.
If you are attractive, you can meet the soul mate; if you are not attractive, even if you meet the soul mate, you should miss it in the end.
Therefore, in a relationship, making yourself attractive should be placed first, and how to love and how to give should be placed in the second place.
If it is reversed, it will be upside down, and I would like to ask a person who does not want to stand upright, do not walk with his feet, but stand upside down and walk with his hands, how can he walk for a long time? Emotional things, too.