In fact, resistance to setbacks, poor breeding, rich nourishment, are contrary to nature, deliberate, just like small saplings grow in the sun and rain, some people say, not every day there is sunshine and rain, we must reduce the sunshine and rain, let it first learn to suffer.
Many parents also complain that their children now know the taste of suffering, and there is no place for their children to experience it.
I remember that there was once a "Metamorphosis" program, once broadcast, caused many parents to pay attention, but also put forward a lot of questions, some family conditions are good, learning is not good, the rebellious children in the family and the children with poor conditions in rural families are exchanged, each experiences the feelings, do not know why it stopped broadcasting.
Krishnamurti said, "Caring is like caring for a plant, watering it, recognizing its needs, giving it fertile soil, and caring for it tenderly and lovingly."
But if you only train your children to adapt to society, you are training them how to fight, then they will be slaughtered by society.
If you really love your children, how can you encourage them to join this human struggle? ”
Wang Renping said: "I personally never dwell on the poor and the rich, I will naturally raise." What kind of life I live, the child will live what kind of life.
Although most of our families are teaching by example and do not deliberately let children do something, the anxiety in the hearts of parents and the worries about their children's future affect their children all the time.
Deliberately allowing children to suffer and living a rich life on their own will sever the connection between children and parents, so that children lack a sense of belonging to the family.
A friend of mine has a very good family, running a national chain of restaurants, but sent his two sons to a private school in the name of the beautiful name, saying that it is to let the children experience the hardships of the grains from an early age, even the dishes they eat are planted by themselves, and there are no vegetables to eat if they cannot be planted or cannot be planted, and the content of learning in class is different from our compulsory education.
I don't know if the family will approve of letting the child go the ordinary way, at least for the child is still very risky.
And tightening their belts to 'enrich' children is not a good practice, their quality of life and life state are not good, can they give children a good education and influence? ”
Many parents may understand the understanding of rich support as material conditions, but in fact, "rich support" should guide the child's spiritual field.
We parents switch to reading books when playing mobile phones, or take their children to museums, bookstores and the like, believing that it is more meaningful for children to enjoy the fun of reading in the sea of books.
A friend told me that her husband was always worried that his children would not survive in society in the future, so he deliberately created some difficulties for his children in life, and the children became very defensive. Mr. let the child experience more frustration education at home, and then enter the society to survive well.
I don't know if there is any merit in this way. But I believe that love teaches love, fear teaches fear, and deliberately cultivates children's ability to resist setbacks out of fear, bringing fear to children, and being careful the more resistant the more frustrated.
As a parent, having trust and respect at home is a rich soil for raising children, and giving high-quality companionship outside is a warm harbor for children.
Unconditional parenting is anti-frustration education, and love is the nutrition of anti-frustration ability.
What do the family think?