From the birth of the child, the challenges faced by parents are one after another.
Especially after the children go to school, the headache for the parents has added 1 more thing: that is, to help the children with homework!
According to the survey of "Report on the Pressure of Writing Homework in Chinese Primary and Secondary Schools", 75.79% of families have had parent-child conflicts due to tutoring homework.
Tutoring homework has become the "biggest killer" affecting parent-child relationships.
There is even a mother who suffers from an anxious headache because of tutoring her child with homework!
News source: People's Daily News
Why is it so hard to tutor homework? How to tutor your child with high quality homework?
Why is it so hard to tutor homework?
Lack of concentration
Children's concentration is limited, when children feel that learning is a boring thing, of course, can't sit still!
I believe that many parents have experienced such a scene -
Concentration does not exceed 3 minutes, and the class is also a small action continuously. I decided to sign him up for a calligraphy class in the summer to improve his concentration. ”
A passage that made me cry and laugh.
Do you have the same idea?
If anything, I think you may have fallen into some misconceptions about "concentration."
1
Myth 1:
Not enough concentration
Just go and learn Go, calligraphy...
Many parents choose to let their children learn chess and Go, practice calligraphy, painting, playing piano, etc. when their children do not have enough concentration. Thinking of fixing the child in front of the table and forcing him to sit for a full hour can gradually develop the child's concentration.
In fact, these methods, if it is a child's favorite interest, may still have some use, if the child is not interested, or as mentioned above, parents force the child to sit in a chair for a period of time, it can be said that it is completely useless.
Many parents think that sitting there without moving = developing their children's concentration is a misunderstanding.
In the face of what the child likes, his concentration will not necessarily be very good, let alone the things that the child does not like, so that a person who plays Go, calligraphy, painting, piano... Children without any interest to cultivate concentration, the difficulty can be imagined, it is really not the general big.
In addition, concentration refers to the ability to maintain a high concentration of mental will for a certain period of time, at the level of thinking and consciousness.
If you simply tie the child's hands and feet and bind his body, it is of no use to the child's thinking.
The premise that a child's concentration can be improved through a certain interest class is that the child is really interested.
The daughter of one of my sisters, who is in the 4th grade this year, I still remember when her little girl was in the 1st grade, and her sister worried about her every day.
This little girl really likes to move, the energy seems to be used up, if it is just like this, it is fine, but for a long time to hear the teacher said that she is active in class, poor concentration, has been deserting, to see the child's results later, my sister is not calm, quickly reported to the little girl piano class.
However, every time the little girl went to piano class, she always deserted and wandered, and the piano practice at night was always full of mistakes. The child's performance on the piano made my sister more firmly believe that her daughter was too active and "couldn't sit still".
How did my sister change this idea? In the second half of the second semester of the second grade, the little girl's birthday, I bought a set of children's fairy tale books for her, and as soon as I received the book, she hid in the room with it. That day we adults have been chatting in the living room, the sister thought about how her daughter was so quiet, so she went to the room to see what she was doing, opened the door and found that her daughter was quietly and attentively reading the set of fairy tale books, until she came out when she was eating.
I said, "Look, isn't she reading books very attentively?" ”
However, as soon as the little girl sat down at the piano, she was still grinding and rubbing, and there were many small movements.
Therefore, she just does not like the piano, and when we force him to sit still in order to improve his child's concentration, he has already entered the misunderstanding of concentration training.
2
Do you ask for kindergarten children
Have a strong focus?
In The Psychology of Early Childhood, it is mentioned that:
Infants and young children aged 0-3 years are in the embryonic stage of physiology, which is mainly unintentional attention. After the age of 3, the child gradually begins to pay attention intentionally.
After the age of 3, it is also the time for children to enter kindergarten, so it is not mandatory to require children to have strong concentration at a very young age.
Regarding the length of the child's concentration, parents do not need to be anxious, because the concentration time has two "degrees":
In general, a child's concentration should develop like this:
But in fact, we will find that due to many factors, children often cannot reach such a level of concentration - saying that they want to read picture books, turning two pages and running; picking toys that they pick, throwing them aside before fiddling with them; eating and singing, and not finishing for 1 hour.
We cultivate children's concentration, to put it bluntly, there are two points: do not destroy, to train.
First of all, don't spoil your child's concentration. Among the four major factors that affect the development of children's concentration, the most common and easily overlooked one is the "environmental factor". Do you often have such scenes in your home:
Children play with toys do not get the point, adults while saying the side of the hand: not play like this, I teach you.
The child is playing seriously, and the adult is going over again: drink some water, eat bananas? Drink yogurt?
Children fiddle with plastic bottles with interest, adults hand over new toys: what's so good about broken bottles, play with this!
These seemingly helping, caring, and giving to children are actually depriving children of the opportunity to think independently little by little. Interrupting a child when he is immersed in his own exploration is destroying his concentration.
We all want our children to learn to concentrate, so when the child initially tries to concentrate on one thing, parents should also do not bother.
Concentration refers to the child's ability to eliminate distractions and concentrate attention, which depends on the cultivation of parents.
The second way to cultivate children's concentration is to adopt a scientific and effective training method.
Some parents understand concentration as the child is motionless and quiet no matter what he does, which is actually a misunderstanding.
Just like some children can stare at the TV for most of the day, they are also motionless, quiet, and even call him to ignore. However, this passive acceptance not only does not represent concentration, but also shows that the child's ability to divert attention is not good enough, which is a manifestation of insufficient concentration.
There are five types of attention: focused attention, selective attention, sustained attention, alternating attention, and distracting attention.
In 2010, the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention conducted a large-scale study of the relationship between physical activity and academic performance of American children, and found that exercise can enhance children's concentration.
Lively and active children show greater concentration than non-athletic children.
Researchers at the University of Illinois in the United States also conducted an experiment:
The results showed that whenever students finished physical activity, they became more focused and had higher academic performance when they studied. These sports activities include physical activities in physical education classes, extracurricular activities and sports.
3
Myth 3:
Children have a lot of small movements, that is, poor concentration
In addition to my sister-in-law, there are many parents who also have this misconception about concentration:
I am the mother of a 6-year-old boy, the teacher has responded to me many times, his concentration in class is very poor, he can't sit still, twisting and turning, small movements are particularly much, this is not about to go to elementary school, I am really anxious.
In fact, some children move around in the seat, which not only means that their concentration is poor, but also may be caused by the child's physical reasons.
For example, children are allergic.
Now more and more children are allergic.
In addition to allergies that cause atopic dermatitis, nose allergies, asthma, etc., allergies have also been found in recent years, and it is also related to the child's "hyperactivity"!
If the child has allergy symptoms, then the proportion of ta "active" will be relatively high.
The main reason is that the annual season change or some other things will make the child have allergy symptoms, resulting in itchy skin, and the child will unconsciously scratch and scratch, resulting in a "hyperactive" phenomenon.
For example, if the child is too thin and causes the bones to protrude, sitting on a hard wooden or plastic chair for a long time will have a sore ass, and in order to make himself comfortable, he will always change his posture.
10 ways to improve children's concentration, it is recommended that parents collect:
Each child's innate temperament is different, and the degree of concentration on things is also different, so in order to improve the child's concentration, it is still necessary to pass some effective methods.
4 types of concentration
Because the innate temperament is different, the concentration performance of each child is also different. Overall, children's concentration can be divided into 4 types. Therefore, before we cultivate our child's concentration, we should first examine which type the child belongs to, and then we can prescribe the right medicine.
1. Procrastinating children
There is no problem for this type of child to concentrate, but to calm down and concentrate on doing things, but it has to make parents spend a lot of effort, most of their temperament is easy to be nervous, sensitive or shy, may need to be nagging their mother every day, he will do what he should do well, when doing homework, he may like to touch things, and when he grows up, he may not delay until the last moment to finish things, and has always given people an "irresponsible" impression, belonging to the children with the lowest concentration.
2. Complex children
How well this type of child's concentration is determined by his mood, environment and physical condition on the day. If there is a slight physical or psychological discomfort, it is likely to have a huge impact on concentration performance. Before they were minors, most children belonged to this category. However, complex children seem to be less tolerant of anything that affects them. If he wants to keep these children focused, unless the activities are particularly interesting or he likes these partners very much, he will definitely leave immediately and do what he really wants to do.
3. Children with extremely high stability
For this type of child, although there will be times of inattention, such a situation rarely occurs. Instead, they can focus on what's going on at hand for the most part. For parents, they are definitely well-disciplined children and never need parents to worry too much.
4. Extreme children
When he is attentive, he is very attentive, but when he does not want to concentrate, no one can take him, which is the characteristic of the concentration of extreme children. As long as he is interested in something, he will concentrate on doing it, and he will not be disturbed by the outside world at all, otherwise he will look lazy. Usually this type of child's personality is more likely to be nervous, if things or circumstances change temporarily, or need to let go temporarily, he usually does not know how to deal with it properly.
Enhance specialty
10 ways to focus on force
1. Don't label your child
Even if your child's concentration is not strong, such as when everyone is sitting in a position to prepare for dinner, he is late, so don't say negative things to your child. For them, this is equivalent to putting a negative label on themselves, which will only make the child deny himself, and it will also cause the child's antipathy to the parents, which is not conducive to the development of parent-child relationship.
2. Observe your child's daily performance
Parents must carefully observe the child's usual behavior and find out the most suitable method for the child. If the child belongs to someone who can calm down and learn, it is of course suitable for guiding in a static way, such as taking the child to listen to some music, letting the child play puzzles, etc. If the child's body must move around in order to learn, it is better to cooperate with the child. For example, when a child is playing, you can casually ask him some questions related to schoolwork, so that he can use his brain while moving his body.
In addition, the younger the child, the more need for large muscle activities, if parents are not convenient to play while talking to the child, you can also use the method of first meeting the child's large muscle activity, and then allowing the child to concentrate on static activities.
3. Help your child create a sense of accomplishment
The joy of success can encourage children to continue to work hard, and when the child successfully meets the requirements of the parents, a small red flower can be rewarded. For example, after collecting 10 small red flowers, you can buy your child a book or toy that he likes, so that the child can continuously improve his ability in a sense of accomplishment.
4. Praise your child's efforts
Don't take the results too seriously, even if the child has not yet met the requirements of adults, but as long as he has a positive performance, parents can also praise the child. When friends and relatives call, parents can praise the child's efforts to others on the phone, such as: "Xiao Kai has been trying to learn to do handicrafts, although it was not too good at the beginning, but he has been working hard, never gave up, you really should come to see!" ”
5. Find ways to keep your child focused
The "method" here is directed at the senses. Some children are particularly attracted to things that are visually stimulating, and some are tactile, and it may be auditory. After learning which sensory stimuli are most attractive to the child, parents can easily improve their child's concentration according to the situation.
6. Divide the work reasonably
The stability of the child is not as good as that of the adult, and if the child is required to solve the problem that requires a long period of concentration to be able to do well at one time, it is of course difficult to get the effect. At this time, you may wish to take a closer look to see how long the child's concentration time can last, and then divide the workload reasonably. In this way, the requirements for the child fall within the reasonable range at the beginning, and then assist the child to gradually extend the working hours of the unit.
7. Pay attention to the tone and instructions of the speech
Once parents are in a hurry, there will be an impatient tone in many cases. In addition, if the parents are not speaking very clearly, it will also make the child feel incomprehensible. Therefore, when talking to young children, they should use a gentle tone, repeat and clearly narrate the instructions, and personally demonstrate them to the children. For example, take the child to see what time the clock is, then prompt the child what to do, and finally lead the child to complete those things together.
8. Let your child understand the importance of persistence
At the beginning or halfway through, if the child starts complaining, "I don't like to do this," then the parent can tell him that it's not that he doesn't like it, it's that he's not paying attention enough. When the child starts a certain learning course, parents can also tell the child what kind of consequences will be if they do not continue, leave the final decision to the child, and let the child understand the importance of persistence.
9. Make good use of effective auxiliary products
When parents know that their child likes an item, they can use those items to strengthen their child's concentration. For example, if a child likes a puzzle with a cartoon pattern, then parents can use the puzzle to let the child stabilize first, and then slowly increase the number of pieces of the puzzle to extend the child's concentration time. Or use hourglass timing, if you simply describe to the child how long 3 minutes is, the child may feel very abstract, then you can use the hourglass as an explanation, after a drip, it means that the time has come for 3 minutes. On the one hand, this can attract the child's attention to time, on the other hand, parents can also more easily observe, if the hourglass is dripped, the child is still doing the original thing, it is a clear indication that the child has improved.
10. Teaching by example is indispensable
It is important for parents to lead by example. If parents want their children to read books, then parents themselves must develop the habit of reading books, even if children and parents can read their own books. On the contrary, if parents hold on to the TV all day, it is not easy to make their children fall in love with reading.
4 manifestations that parents want to quit
While cultivating children's concentration, parents should also pay attention to their own performance, and do not affect their children's concentration because of themselves.
1. Parents are acute
Urgent words and deeds will have a negative impact on children, and under the long-term exposure, children will also learn to say emotionally anxious words from parents. Although parents only hope that they can be more efficient at work and at home, such a eagerness is easy to set a bad example for their children. In this way, once the child encounters a problem that is difficult to solve, the first thing that comes to mind is not to be patient to solve it, but to lose his temper first.
2. Think about things going too far
Of course, it's not a bad thing to look long-term, but being long-term doesn't mean you can skip the present. If children are taught such values for a long time, it will be difficult to enjoy and satisfy everything they have, and naturally they will not be able to cultivate enough concentration.
3. Over-indulgence of children
Excessive freedom and laissez-faire are also harmful to a child's concentration. Because parents are busy at work now, after taking their children home, many people's way is to turn on the TV for their children to watch, or let the children engage in their favorite activities. Over time, children themselves will develop the habit of turning on the TV as soon as they come home. Since there is no parent to guide and supervise, it is difficult to have a good effect on the cultivation of concentration.
4. Disturb your child often
It may be out of a playful mentality, when the child is very concentrated on doing their own games or other activities, some parents always like to suddenly mess with the child, or ask the child to do something else, which is a very unreasonable behavior. If parents want to cultivate their children's concentration, then when the child is playing or reading books very intently, it is best for parents not to interrupt the child's behavior immediately, but to use the method of preview. For example, parents have made an appointment with their children, they can see what time they read, and 5 to 10 minutes before the time limit arrives, they can first remind their children that the time is coming. In addition to verbal reminders, parents can also use some auxiliary tools such as bells, alarm clocks, etc.
Of course, there are many ways to cultivate children's concentration, parents can take appropriate and effective methods for their children's personality characteristics, and train and cultivate children's concentration in a planned and purposeful manner.
Write at the end:
Parents understand the importance of concentration to their children, and know that the level of concentration determines the quality of their children's academic performance to a large extent.
Therefore, parents pay special attention to the cultivation of children's concentration, and they will also become "grass and trees" in this regard.
But cultivating children's concentration is not an overnight thing, and it also needs to get out of the misunderstanding and find the right way.