Hulina's mother, Ding Jiali
Author/Wilderness
One
In 1987, actress Ding Jiali was about to go to the basin when she received a call from her husband Hu Guangchuan.
On the other end of the phone, Hu Guangchuan stabbed her with cold and vicious words:
"I've gotten better with a woman who is more than ten years older than you, and I know exactly what you've done, and I'm going to get revenge on you."
Ding Jiali, who has a big belly, remembers her experience of cheating in marriage and having abortions with others.
Unexpectedly, Hu Guangchuan always knew that Ding Jiali suddenly felt ashamed and embarrassed.
Hu Guangchuan chose to ruthlessly expose and abandon Ding Jiali when she was in the basin, so as to achieve the purpose of revenge, which made Ding Jiali feel desperate and resentful.
In this kind of mixed feelings, Ding Jiali gave birth to a daughter in loneliness, nine deaths, named Hu Linna, nicknamed Tintin.
When she looked at the little baby girl in front of her, she remembered Hu Guangchuan, and she couldn't love her daughter.
Since a marriage is coming to an end and Ding Jiali is also going to meet a new life, she cannot let the "evil fruit" born with her prodigal son Hu Guangchuan stop her steps.
A month after giving birth to Hu Linna, Ding Jiali gave up the custody of her daughter and forced her daughter to Hu Guangchuan's parents.
Ding Jiali said to Hu Guangchuan's parents:
"You ask for money and I'll give it money, and you can raise her."
Ding Jiali is so determined that she has no compassion for her daughter at all.
She was thinking about her own life, and she hadn't thought about how her young daughter could grow up without the company and care of her parents.
Hu Linna became the seed of Ding Jiali and Hu Guangchuan's mutual gambling and mutual hatred.
Father does not hurt mother does not love, this fate is doomed from birth.
Two
Hulina, who was abandoned by her mother, was waiting to be fed, not knowing what was happening to her.
Under the care of her grandparents, she grew up to be 5 years old.
Others have mom and dad, but she has never seen mom, and dad has disappeared in her life.
She also knows from the adult chats:
Mother Ding Jiali is married again, and she has a brother who does not want her.
His father, Hu Guangchuan, did not shoot a drama and went to the sea to do business, and he was imprisoned and disappeared ever since.
Grandparents are old, not in good health, 5-year-old Hulina is the age to need someone to take care of, where should she go?
The grandparents had no ability to raise her, only to force her into her uncle.
The uncle also has two children in the family, and the living conditions are not good.
Of course, the uncle was not happy, so Hulina became the uncle's burden and a thorn in the eye.
In this new home, uncle never gave her a good look.
A child can be keenly aware of his or her position in the family.
Her uncle didn't love her, and this family didn't belong to her, so she could only let herself become sensible early.
She talks as little as she can, does more, and takes on all sorts of housework.
Despite this, she still could not escape her uncle's scolding.
Once, she and her uncle's children were playing a "pillow" war, and they were on their heads, and a loud slap fell on her face.
Standing in front of her angrily.
She was trembling with fright, it wasn't the first time, it wasn't the last.
Subsequently, she was dragged by her uncle by the collar to the little black room and locked up.
In the darkness, Hulina cried and shouted in fright, but let her cry, and her uncle was indifferent.
She was in the little black room, thinking of her mother and father, and she wanted to be pampered and treated gently by her parents.
In this home, there is no warmth, Hulina can only clip her tail and be a person.
Occasionally on television, Ding Jiali appeared.
The uncle's family would sneer and tell her, "This is your mother, she doesn't want you anymore." ”
This also planted hatred for little Hulina, who asked in her heart countless times: "Why doesn't Mom and Dad want me?" ”
Three
After Ding Jiali abandoned Hu Linna, she decided to pursue her own life.
In 1991, Ding Jiali married a teacher at a college and gave birth to a son, Guoguo, but divorced again due to her husband's betrayal.
But Ding Jiali did not abandon her son, but let her daughter disappear in her own life.
It wasn't until Hu Linna was 11 years old that Ding Jiali appeared in front of her for the first time.
Seeing her mother, Hulina was surprised and delighted, strange and scared.
She approached her mother cautiously, and Ding Jiali looked at her daughter in front of her and couldn't help but put her arms around her and cry.
Hulina was hugged by her mother for the first time, and her mother's arms were very warm.
She flashed her eyes and begged Ding Jiali: "Mom, please take me home." ”
Ding Jiali flashed a hint of hesitation in her eyes, and seeing the longing in her daughter's eyes, she had to nod her head perfunctorily.
Hulina has been clinging to her mother, afraid that her mother will disappear from this world again.
Therefore, Ding Jiali took out 10 yuan and coaxed Hu Linna to go to the hutong to buy toys.
Little Hulina believed it and went out happily with the money.
When she returned, her mother, Ding Jiali, was gone.
She chased her out, chased her to the bus stop, and didn't see her mother anywhere, and she didn't know where her mother lived.
Helpless, she squatted on the ground and cried.
After crying for two hours, she was tired of crying, it was dark, the snow was falling, and the cold wind was even more bitter.
But that mood was worse than the weather, so that Hu Linna couldn't help but cry when she remembered it later.
The second time Hulina saw her mother was three years later.
She did not do well in the exam that time, and was asked by her uncle to come over to her mother.
In front of Ding Jiali, 15-year-old Hu Linna was slapped to the ground by her uncle.
Covering her face, she staggered up.
Her mother, Ding Jiali, looked at her and cried all the time, but this tear could not wash away Hu Linna's hatred for her.
It is precisely because of her mother's 15 years of cruel abandonment and indifference that she grew up so hard.
She had never felt the warmth of her mother, the care of her father, why her parents' failed marriage should let her bear all this with a child.
Hulina wrote in her diary:
"I have a dad and a mom, but why can't I see them?"
I'm not luggage, why am I being put in foster care outside?
Mom has a home, why can't I go back?
I live in my uncle's house, my heart is lonely, and my heart is wandering. ”
This time, Ding Jiali relaxed under the pressure of her uncle: "You can come to your mother's side during the holidays." ”
But Ding Jiali said this sentence too late, Hu Linna is already 15 years old, and she is as tall as her mother.
In 15 years, her mother had only visited her twice, but the distance between mother and daughter was only more than 10 stops away from the bus.
In Hulina's heart, her mother did not love her, and it was her mother who did not want her.
Four
In high school, Hulina boarded at the school.
She rarely contacted Ding Jiali, and rarely appeared in Ding Jiali's home.
Ding Jiali missed not only the growth of her daughter, but also the connection between mother and daughter.
Hu Linna once revealed to Ding Jiali that she wanted to learn acting and become an actor.
Ding Jiali scoffed and said: "You have not received professional training since you were a child, how can you be a good actor?" ”
After the college entrance examination, Hu Linna was admitted to an ordinary college in Beijing.
During college, classmates all went home on weekends, and Hulina was alone in the dormitory.
She didn't want to go back to her uncle's house or to her mother's house.
After graduating from university, Hulina rented a 9-square-meter house by herself.
She got a job as a video editor with a monthly salary of only 3,000 yuan.
Chinese New Year's Eve night when the fireworks bloom, every home is harmonious; and Hulina buys a piece of tofu in the rental house and spends the year alone with two steamed buns.
Unable to pay the heating bill, she was cut off by the landlord and woke up in the middle of the night.
In 2018, when the crew of the "I Am Not a Star" program came to her to participate in the show, Hu Linna only had 2,000 yuan on her.
Other celebrity children are here to earn fame, and only Hulina is here to earn notice fees.
The program team wants to invite Ding Jiali to come over and act as an assistant for her daughter Hu Linna.
Ding Jiali felt that her daughter was not self-sufficient, there was no hope of promotion, came to the program group and left, making Hu Linna collapse and cry on the spot.
Later, Hu Linna made her own efforts all the way to the final, and Ding Jiali came to play as an assistant for her daughter.
On the stage, Hulina explained to the public the history of her growth over the years, full of blood and tears.
Ding Jiali realized that she owed her daughter too much and caused irreversible harm to her daughter.
The mother and daughter also began to slowly reconcile on this stage.
Hu Linna also began to enter the show business circle through the show.
Over the years, Hu Linna has taken over many film and television dramas such as "Old Chinese Medicine", "Knife Tip Dancer", "Meritorious Achievement", "Xiaguang", "Rural Secretary", "Ronan's Speech" and so on, and her acting skills have gradually been recognized by the public.
HuLina, now 35 years old, has two wishes:
"One is to have a warm little home with your own lovers and children;
The second is that she hopes to see her father one day in the future. ”
Hulina longed for love, longed for the warmth of her family, but to this day she is still unmarried and has been looking for it.
Five
After reading Hu Linna's story, I can't help but remind the author of a sentence:
"A happy childhood can heal a lifetime, and an unhappy childhood must be cured with a lifetime."
Actress Ding Jiali gave birth to Hulina when she was young, but she was born without raising her, and she was ashamed to be a mother, which laid a sad background for her daughter's life.
But Ding Jiali's treatment of her son Guoguo, who was also divorced by her husband's betrayal, was a different scene.
She kneels for her son's schooling; when her son takes the college entrance examination, Ding Jiali pushes away all her work to accompany her son.
Hu Linna, on the other hand, is Ding Jiali's child who abandoned after giving birth.
It has to be suspected that Ding Jiali is a patriarchal mother.
After abandoning her daughter, Ding Jiali fell in love non-stop.
She squandered her life in a series of failed relationships, but she was reluctant to give a little emotion and a little time to treat Hulina.
Some people say that the love of parents can nourish a child throughout life.
Those children who have never received the love of their parents always have a black hole in their hearts, and they have been looking for love and filling the emptiness all their lives.
I hope that in the days to come, with the reconciliation with her mother, Hulina can truly heal herself and find her own happiness.
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