It is often said that young couples come together for the elderly. The most important role of husband and wife is reflected in the old age, and it is a person's greatest blessing to have a good partner and take care of themselves in the old age when they are sick.
For families with good conditions, once there is a patient in the family, there is always a way to take care of it. However, for families with ordinary conditions, there are serious illnesses in the family, which is undoubtedly worse.
Sometimes, children who are not yet adults and have not yet retired themselves may be knocked down by diseases. At this time, the family not only has to face economic pressure, but who will take care of it has become a major matter that must be solved.
In the courtyard, there is a big sister Yuan who is like this. At the age of 51, her husband, who was two years older than her, suddenly suffered from cerebral hemorrhage and was admitted to the hospital. That year, his son had just gone to college, and she was the only one in the family, and she had to go to the hospital to take care of her husband while she had to go to work. At this time, the eldest sister who was far away rushed over.
The eldest sister was 57 years old, had only one daughter, and after retiring at the age of 50, she had been helping her daughter with her children, and now, her granddaughter was in elementary school and no longer needed her help. Her husband is still at work. Coupled with the fact that the relationship between their sisters and brothers has been good since childhood, now that her brother is seriously ill, she does not hesitate to rush over to help.
Sister Yuan's husband lived in the hospital for nearly a month, and when he was discharged, he was still slurred, half of his body could not move, and he needed to be waited for a long time. This made Sister Yuan very embarrassed. After the husband fell ill, the monthly bonus paid by the unit was gone, and only the basic salary was left. My son is still in college, and it's time to use the money. Everything in the family is up to herself, and she can't take a long vacation. Therefore, the arrival of the eldest sister is really a charcoal in the snow, which makes her overjoyed.
However, the eldest sister took care of her brother for less than a year, and the contradiction with Sister Yuan became white-hot, and none of them wanted to let it. The eldest sister kept counting the number of sisters-in-law in front of her brother, and The husband of Elder Sister Yuan listened more and was also dissatisfied with his wife. Although he couldn't speak clearly, from the words he jumped out of, Sister Yuan could hear his anger.
Sister Yuan was also very aggrieved in her heart, she went out early and returned late every day, working hard for the family, not only did her husband's family think that she was not good, but even her husband lying on the bed did not appreciate her. She regretted letting the eldest sister come to serve her husband, if she hired a nanny, but the economy was a little tighter, she saved some frugality, at least, the family would not have so many contradictions.
The eldest sister believes that the younger sister-in-law usually rarely cares about her brother, and she waits for her brother to eat and drink Lasa. Although the sister-in-law is at work, after work, she should come back as soon as possible to take care of her husband and let her rest. After all, she is here to help, and her sister-in-law is the owner of the house, and she should fulfill her responsibility as a wife.
But Sister Yuan didn't think she was doing a good job. She is already more than half a hundred years old, in order to earn a little more money, in the unit with those twenty or thirty years old young people busy, at the end of the day, the body is difficult to eat. She must ensure her good health in order to maintain the normal operation of the home. Especially after the eldest sister came, the family had an extra mouth, and they had to rely on themselves to support themselves. Although the eldest sister said that she took care of her brother, she was usually not particularly busy, and she could find time to rest.
Besides, when the husband was originally in good health, his family did not help the eldest sister less, and now his family encountered difficulties, and the eldest sister came to help, and it was also a courtesy exchange, and there was no one who owed whom. But in the eyes of the eldest sister, she originally accepted the help of her brother's family because their sister and brother had a good relationship, and she remembered this love on her brother's head. Therefore, her brother is now sick in bed, and she cannot let her brother suffer a little grievance, and she is very dissatisfied with some of her sister-in-law's behavior.
The eldest sister wants to take her brother to the hospital for massage, but Sister Yuan is unwilling, thinking that there is not much effect, with this kung fu, it is better to exercise more at home, the effect will be better. But her statement, in the eyes of the eldest sister, is because the sister-in-law is unwilling to spend money on her brother, after all, the cost of professional physiotherapy is not within the scope of medical insurance, and she needs to pay for herself.
What makes the eldest sister even more angry is that the younger daughter-in-law often goes to the beauty salon to do skin care for herself and do physical health care. From this matter, it can be seen that the sister-in-law is a woman who only has herself in her heart, regardless of whether her brother is dead or alive.
But Sister Yuan believes that she is usually busy for the family, never buys high-priced clothes, and is always complained about by colleagues in the unit, shouldn't she do skin care? What's wrong with doing simple body health care? All of this is the money you earn. Is it possible that if there is a patient in the family, the other half cannot have their own life except for earning money?
The eldest sister took care of her husband for less than a year, and Sister Yuan regretted that she should not be allowed to take care of her. Now at home, the younger brother and sister have become a faction, and the self who earns money to support them has become an external faction. She thought that if she hired a nanny herself, even if it was a little harder, she would be willing, at least there would not be so many contradictions in the family.
The different statements of Sister Yuan and Sister Yuan and Sister Yuan seem to make sense from onlookers. The eldest sister hopes that the younger sister-in-law will fulfill the responsibility of a wife, go home early after work, take more care of her brother, and usually do not spend money indiscriminately. As an older sister, she was able to leave her husband and come to serve her brother, and she had the right to question her sister-in-law's behavior.
But in the eyes of Sister Yuan, she is also older, and she still has to support her family and buy medicine for her husband, and she has done her full responsibility. Because her husband is sick, she should go to work every day in disgrace and circle around her husband every day after work. Is it only by doing this that she can be considered a conscientious wife in the eyes of her husband's family?
The story of Sister Yuan reminds me of a recent chat with a wise elder. He told me that it was better to be cold with relatives and not to get too close. Because relatives do things, it is easy to lose their measure, cross the boundaries, and finally not only do not help, but also affect everyone's relationship.
And what happened in Sister Yuan's family seems to confirm this view. In a family, husband and wife are the core of the family relationship, and anyone who wants to insert into such a relationship will eventually make the relationship between husband and wife estranged.
Just like the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in many families, the root cause of the contradiction is that the mother-in-law is bent on being good to her son, not accustomed to the behavior of the daughter-in-law, thinking that the housework, the daughter-in-law should do more, she also has to save money for the family, can not spend it arbitrarily, even if this money is earned by the daughter-in-law herself.
The first person in the family is always the relationship between husband and wife, and the relationship between husband and wife is the needle of the sea god in the family. But now in many families, the relationship between a large family is always cut and messed up. If the family of one of the spouses is inserted into the life of the husband and wife, interfering with the relationship between them and pointing fingers, it will eventually ruin the otherwise happy and beautiful marriage.
The best way to get along with relatives is to maintain boundaries. Don't force others to do what you want, you can keep your inner thoughts and don't interfere too much in order to get along. If this cannot be done, stay away, is the best way.
In life, we must have a sense of boundaries in everything we do, and there must be a distance between people who are close to us. Understand what should be done and what should not be managed, and firmly establish boundaries in order to maintain a virtuous circle of relationships with others.
As a reader, how do you view the contradiction between Sister Yuan and Sister Yuan? You can leave a message in the comment area.
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