When chatting with a friend, she said a sentence: "A boy who used to like him so much, but now it seems that the boy is just so ordinary, and his character is not good, I really don't know why I pursued him so long." ”
Hearing her words made me feel very emotional.
It seems that in the consciousness of most people, there will be a similar experience: "The person who used to like it so much, now it seems that the other party is really bad; but somehow, the original self is so obsessed with the other party." 」 ”
In fact, this is the state of liking a person.
Like is passion, is freshness, is a certain shining point in the other person to attract you; such like, like a flash, short-lived and confusing.
And loving someone?
When we fall in love with someone, it is the test of time, and it is also the choice we make after examining our hearts.
How to judge whether you are truly in love with a person? It's actually quite simple.
-01
Physiological sensations
First: There is a clear desire
From the moment you become friends with each other, you want to be closer to each other.
After becoming a lover with the other party, this feeling becomes more and more obvious, it seems that no matter how tired you are together, you will not feel tired, but feel that "it is not enough".
This is the most obvious manifestation of our love for a person.
What is desire?
We can understand it as: physiological impulses and desires, closeness in distance.
For example: want to hug each other, hold hands, have intimate behavior.
When living together, no matter what flaws the other person shows, you can accept it.
The shortcomings in him are informal to you; the advantages in him are magnified infinitely by you.
Second: long-term dependence and possessiveness
Have you ever seen a couple who have been loving for ten years?
The reason why their feelings can always be "fresh" and always loving, and there has never been any problem with their feelings, is essentially the interdependence of the two hearts.
Trust unreservedly, rely completely on each other, and be willing to give their best in dealing with feelings.
It is possessiveness, falling in love with a person and wanting to possess everything of the other party, including the other party's emotions, time, etc.
This is human nature.
If you find that when you get along with each other, you are more and more unable to leave each other, and you miss each other for a moment, it means that you have fallen into love and cannot extricate yourself.
I have a pair of lovers next to me, and even when they are at work, they keep talking about 10 times a day.
Nothing, just wanted to hear each other's voices.
Later, I asked him: Isn't it boring to do this?
He said: They are all used to it, and if they don't hear each other's voices for hours, they are not used to it.
You see, in the eyes of others, it is a little strange, but in the eyes of people who love each other, it is dependence and habit.
-02
Emotional feelings
First: trust and security
When we truly fall in love with someone, we can get enough "trust" from the other person.
Your vulnerability, little secrets, bad emotions, and even your bad taste are willing to show it to the other person without reservation.
You know, no one but the other person deserves this because you trust the other person and love each other deeply.
And in the process of your love, you can feel safe from this relationship.
Psychology believes that two people who love each other deeply can get enough intimacy and trust when they get along, which makes both people very comfortable.
What is a comfort zone?
The comfort zone in the relationship is that how long you are with the other party, you will not feel tired, but you are willing to enjoy this short and eternal moment for a long time.
Second: self-esteem, heartache, praise
Psychology believes that when we truly love someone, we will always feel sorry for each other.
Heartache for his work, heart for his negative emotions, heart for the pressure he is facing, and willing to help each other with his best efforts.
To love someone, to give is from the heart, without any taking.
Second, when we love each other, we can feel "high self-esteem" from it: you are only with him; without being with him, you feel that you are imperfect.
Because from him, you feel loved, respected.
In the end, the way you love each other is "praise each other."
Your praise for him, like admiring a flower, admiring a beautiful view, is not limited to "the lover's eyes out of the West", but from the heart of love.
Only loving someone can make you praise him from the heart.
-03
Like is a beautiful bubble, love is a beautiful becomes a reality
One difference between liking and loving is that liking is full of illusions, bubbles, and vague.
Love, on the other hand, is real, something that can be touched in reality.
You may fall in love with a person because of their looks, body, voice, or even good cooking; however, it's hard to fall in love with each other.
And loving a person is a deep fascination, dependence, and continuous attraction; loving a person will have a feeling of "flaws and imperfections".
Although there are many flaws in the other person, you don't care in your heart because you feel that none of them matter.
In many literature and film and television works, it is customary to interpret love with such a plot: "For the beloved, I am willing to give my most precious things, even if it is the future and destiny." ”
In fact, loving someone is exactly what it is, willingly giving for the person you love, but not asking for anything in return.
And like someone? Appreciation prevails, and the effort will be hesitant to weigh the pros and cons.
Today's Topic:
Have you ever fallen in love with each other?
(Article with picture source network)