"I want you all to pause and really think about a world without sound, without any other means of communication", this is Martin? The cover of Pistorius's autobiographical novel The Aphasia is also his manifesto for informing people of his own world.
From the age of 12, he suffered from an unknown disease, because of this disease he had no way to speak, no way to communicate with people, only to sit in a wheelchair, to be taken care of by others.
Imagine a scenario where your mind is active and you have a beautiful world in your head, where you want to communicate your feelings with others, but you can't make a sound when you open your mouth.
Although you are alive, able to breathe, able to think, your voice is imprisoned in your body, your heart is beating, but your person is closed.
You feel like a ghost, floating in the air, no one can see you, no one sparks your mind with you, no one thinks you're alone.
You think it's just fiction, but it's the real life of Martin, who is known as the "Ghost Boy."
At the age of 12, he began a 14-year life of aphasia due to an illness.
Rare disease at the age of 12
In 1988, Martin was 12 years old, born in an engineer's home, his life was very superior, and his parents gave him full love.
For the past 12 years, like all carefree children, he has run in the sun every day, playing games with friends and tasting new delicacies with his parents.
But no one thought that in this year, his life would be completely changed.
One day, when he was in school, he suddenly felt unwell, so he told the teacher, and the teacher asked his parents to take him to the hospital for examination.
I thought it was just a normal illness of a child, but as soon as I arrived at the hospital, the doctor told the whole family bad news.
He did not have a simple fever, but a serious disease called Cryptococcus meningitis, which invaded the central nervous system and gradually lost control of his body.
After learning that he had this disease, his parents did not give up, but actively sought medical treatment for him and treated him in the hospital, but despite spending a lot of money, his condition did not get any better, on the contrary, his condition became worse and worse.
From the initial headache and dizziness, to the final trembling, coma ... Slowly, various complications followed, his body became more and more uncontrolled, all functions suffered serious violations, and finally he could not even speak, becoming a "semi-vegetative person".
His health was getting worse and worse, but the hospital could not even diagnose what disease he had, and could only regret to tell his parents that he might become a vegetative person in the future.
When the parents heard this, they were very devastated, and they could not imagine that a carefree little boy who was bouncing around had become like this.
However, they still did not give up, and since the hospital could not cure it, they should take good care of the child at home, at least not to let him suffer too much.
Unexpectedly awakened but unable to communicate
By the time Martin was discharged from the hospital, he was already a vegetative person, and neither the external limbs nor the inner cerebral cortex could sense any of his activities.
Except that his heart was still beating, he was no different from a plant.
After his parents took Martin home, they took care of him subtly.
It is also miraculous to say that although in the past few years he still could not perceive everything in the outside world, but one day a few years later, his brain suddenly woke up.
That is to say, although he still can't open his eyes and can't speak, he can feel everything in the outside world, can hear others talking, and can smell the aroma.
At that time, he tried all his strength to open his eyes, to move his fingers to tell others that he had woken up, but he couldn't.
His body was so stiff, his fingers were so heavy, he couldn't even do such a small thing as blinking his eyes and moving his eyeballs.
He could hear every cry of his parents at his bedside, and he could hear others pointing at him, but he couldn't open his mouth and say a word.
He felt like a ghost, his body imprisoned in a hospital bed, his soul free but unable to communicate with people.
Sometimes he wished he could be liberated as soon as possible, both physically and mentally.
What made him even more miserable was that in addition to the daily loneliness of his soul, his flesh was also suffering from inhuman destruction.
Inhuman life in a nursing home
At the beginning of the illness, the parents, in addition to being unacceptable, were still very optimistic, and they both thought that Martin would wake up one day.
But as time went on, my mother gradually began to be anxious, nervous, and even depressed to the point of wanting to commit suicide.
In order to take care of him, the father also resigned his proud position as an engineer and watched over his son at home, who never seemed to wake up.
But his parents still have to live, and it is impossible to be with him every day. So when his parents couldn't take care of him, he was sent to a nursing home.
It was a nightmare for him, when he had woken up, but the caregiver thought he was a vegetative person, so it was like this corpse to him.
According to his recollections in his novels, each of the caretakers here is as fierce as a demon, and they see vegetative people as human beings and as their own decompression tools.
Sometimes, they would beat him up and torture him to satisfy their perverted pleasures.
For example, they would put a hot spoon in his mouth to see how he reacted, and some nurses would sexually assault him...
They think that Martin is a person who will never wake up, and everything they do is known only to themselves, but no one thinks that this seemingly motionless "toy" has actually woken up long ago, and he has remembered all these tortures on him.
Fourteen years later, the 26-year-old Martin suddenly had a strange expression, and the nurse who took care of him noticed this subtle change and told his parents.
The parents rejoiced and informed the doctor of his change, who told them that Martin was conscious and that his body was recovering. In other words, this vegetative person who has been bedridden for 14 years is going to wake up.
Martin also never thought he could wake up, and in more than 10 years of bedridden life, he had become accustomed to this gray space, and he did not dare to expect to live again.
After that, the doctor arranged a rehabilitation course for him, with special equipment, he can transform his thinking into brain language and communicate with people, and his ghost is finally seen.
After that, his body also slowly recovered, he slowly became a normal person, no one knew that this was a vegetative person who had been lying in bed for 14 years.
epilogue
Martin wrote a book about all his encounters and wanted to tell everyone what it meant to him that this was 4 years of aphasia.
I also want all those who are in pain, do not give up hope, one day will be willow dark flowers, there will always be someone waiting for you. The so-called miracles are the power of love.