01 "Independent Woman" Siwen vs "Silk Flower" Cheng Lisha
The new season of "Talk Show Convention" is over again.
Cheng Lu changed his body, changed the "leader" persona, and flourished on the stage.
Si Wen has left the stage of talk shows, and the label of "independent woman" + "divorced" has also been mentioned again and again.
At the beginning of the 20s, Si Wen once mentioned the reason for his divorce in an interview, they were independent of each other in marriage, even if Si Wen's closest family died, in Cheng Lu's eyes, it was still the "independent woman who looked good".
Cheng Lu, who "eats soft rice", has become a "leader", but Siwen is still bound by the label of "independent woman", and even divorce is talked about.
Some time ago, when Sister Riding the Wind and Waves 2 was broadcast, Cheng Lisha caused a lot of controversy because of her identity as a "housewife".
She introduced herself as "Guo Xiaodong's wife" when she appeared, and it seems that those achievements in her acting career have not only been forgotten by netizens, but even herself, and she does not take it seriously, but is proud of being someone else's "wife".
Many people say, "She treats herself as an appendage of a man", "She gives humblely in her feelings", "Throws away her career to marry someone who doesn't love her at all"?
In the eyes of those people, Cheng Lisha, who lives by relying on Mrs. Guo Xiaodong's label, is a loser, and Siwen, who divorces with the label of an independent woman, is also a loser.
02 "I would love to rely on him"
When Sister Lang 2 was picking, the program team asked Cheng Lisha a question, "In fact, on this stage, you don't want to mention something that is Guo Xiaodong's wife." ”
Perhaps in the eyes of many people, the presupposition answer is "yes", but Cheng Lisha did the opposite, saying, "I don't want to, I want to rely on him." ”
She is open to her identity as "someone else's wife", putting this identity ahead of her other identities, and even taking pride in this identity.
"I am myself, and I am also his wife, and this is a fact, so why can't I say that?"
Yeah, why not?
Maybe it's because, "I'm myself," most people don't understand.
03 "Kidnapped Independent Women"
After Siwen's divorce, many counselors discussed the relationship, saying that she was most likely "dependent on incompetent people", tended to interpret negative emotions for those around her, gave up positive communication and help for help with her partner, and armed herself with an "independent" face.
When relying on the label of "independent woman" to become the "queen of talk shows", "independence" is her weapon, and "leaving personal space" between husband and wife to each other is her way of running marriage, after divorce, "independence" has become her defect, and "personal space" has also become "dependent incompetence".
I don't know since when, "independence" has become a mandatory requirement, even papi sauce let children follow their husband's surname, Cheng Lisha introduced herself as Guo Xiaodong's wife, Siwen divorced such things, but also deserve to be pulled out "criticism and criticism".
It seems that only women who are "beautiful and idle, do not take men seriously, and only want to make money" are ideal models worthy of emulation and worthy of respect.
04 "Independent" is an option
Unfortunately, people are not machines, even If Siwen, whose "independent woman" label is welded to death, has begun to struggle against this role.
I don't know how many people know that Si Wen thought very early on that his first marriage would definitely leave.
Her mother has been divorced 5 times, her grandmother has been divorced 2 times, and even her sister-in-law has been divorced.
Whether divorce exists or not she does not know, what she knows is that marriage is a matter of happiness, when this thing begins to make her feel unhappy, bringing negative emotions more than positive emotions, contrary to the general consciousness, "big deal divorce" is actually a better choice.
"20.30.40" begins with:
"Say what you are used to loneliness, in addition to work or work, what do you call life?"
If women want to live a wonderful life, they must understand that this is an era that needs to take the initiative and be happy with themselves."
Life is much more bloody than the plot, but it is not as black and white as in the plot, and it is impossible that only the happiness that lives in the definition of some people is a good life.
As Papi Sauce responded in an interview, "I don't want to label myself an independent woman, and I'm not trying to endorse any kind of life." ”
Yang Kasa also said frankly, "The main purpose of my talk show is to express myself, starting from the real situations and feelings of my past life." ”
"Free women" or "independent women" represent "I do / I don't want to", the subject is me, the object is my will, has nothing to do with public opinion, has nothing to do with the definition of happiness in the eyes of the public, and even has little to do with gender.
Just like Siwen's remarks on Weibo 2 months ago, I hope that one day, both men and women can get rid of the shackles of the inherent evaluation system, want to make money to support their families, or look beautiful, and be happy on their own.