With 4 months to go to kindergarten, Nana was already starting to get anxious.
The reason is that at the beginning of the month, Nana enrolled her child in a half-day kindergarten class. I wanted my child to experience kindergarten life in advance so that he could prepare for entering kindergarten in September.
As a result, I went to school for 3 days, and the child cried for 3 days. As soon as Nana took him in the direction of the kindergarten, he began to cry, crying and shouting: I don't want to go to the kindergarten.
Nana was distressed and anxious: she cried like this for half a day, what should she do if she went to kindergarten in September?
To be honest, it's really common for children to cry when they go to kindergarten.
Some are like Tingting's son, who cries as soon as they go to kindergarten, and they cry without stopping; some are like Ding Dong, crying twice at school and after school, and immediately laughing when they are given something to eat and drink......
It is also the first time to go to kindergarten, why do some children cry and some children do not cry or make trouble? Dingdong's kindergarten teacher once said that most of the children who "don't cry" in kindergarten are related to their families.
01.
Depending on the type of child, the crying situation is different
John Bowby, the father of attachment psychology, conducted extensive experiments and analyses to divide the child's dependence with the primary caregiver (mother) into four categories: secure attachment, avoidant attachment, ambivalent attachment, and chaotic attachment.
1. Secure attachment children will be very sad when they first enter kindergarten and cry more violently, because they have a strong attachment to their mother and are reluctant to leave each other.
But soon, the children will understand that their mother has not left them, and that they will be able to see their mother after school, and then they will stop crying and will be able to integrate well into class life.
2. Avoidant attachment children generally do not cry, but are like little adults, especially calm.
3. Ambivalent attachment children have a low sense of security, cry for a long time, and often immerse themselves in their own sad and frustrated emotions.
4. Children with disorganized attachment generally do not cry, but they may get angry and take a long time to come out.
Comparing the characteristics of the four attachments, Tingting's son is obviously a child with ambivalent attachment, and Dingdong is a child with secure attachment. Most of the children who don't cry or make a fuss have avoidant attachment and chaotic attachment, which is mostly related to the family environment they are in.
02.
In order for children to have a sufficient sense of security and easily adapt to kindergarten life, it is recommended that parents start from themselves and provide their children with a good, comfortable and loving family environment.
1. Express love to children often, let children feel unconditional love and support from their parents, and enhance their sense of security. This sense of security will make children feel more confident and courageous in the face of new circumstances.
Take kindergarten as an example, children who have a sense of security understand that going to kindergarten is not to leave their parents, but to explore, to make friends, as long as they get out of school and turn their heads, they can see their parents.
2. Encourage children to express their emotions, whether they are happy or sad. Let your child learn how to deal with and express his emotions so that he or she can better cope with separation anxiety in a new environment.
3. Give timely feedback and encouragement to children's positive behaviors. Especially 10 minutes before bedtime, parents can talk to their children about what happened during the day, praise their progress, and express their love for their children.
This positive reinforcement can make the child more motivated to show positive in the new environment and reduce crying behavior.
03.
In order for children to easily adapt to kindergarten life, parents also need to help them develop these 4 habits.
1. Independent eating habits
Parents need to cultivate their children's ability to eat independently in advance, which can not only reduce the burden on kindergarten teachers, but also help cultivate children's self-care ability.
In fact, as early as 11-12 months of age, children can start to cultivate.
Parents can prepare foods that are easy for their children to eat on their own, such as lumps of fruit, vegetables or meat floss, and encourage them to sit in their own high chair and use utensils to eat. Parents can sit next to their children and give them proper guidance to help them learn to eat independently.
2. Habits of work and rest on time
Make sure your child goes to bed on time every day and gets enough sleep.
Teach children to abide by the kindergarten schedule, such as kindergarten entry time, kindergarten departure time, lunch break time, etc.
Parents can help their children develop a regular schedule, including wake-up time, breakfast time, and bedtime time, and set a regular bedtime ritual for their children, such as bathing, storytelling, chatting, etc., to help children develop good habits.
3. Pay attention to hygiene habits
When your child enters kindergarten, he or she should learn to maintain personal hygiene, such as washing his hands and brushing his teeth.
Parents can set up a washing area for their children with hand sanitizer, toothbrushes and other cleaning supplies, and then wash their hands and brush their teeth with their children and guide them to follow the correct steps to clean.
At the same time, it is also necessary to educate children to keep the environment clean and tidy and not littering.
4. Be polite and get used to treating others
Cultivating good manners in children will help them get along better with teachers and classmates.
Parents can start with daily life by teaching their children to say polite words such as "please", "thank you", "sorry", etc., and model the correct attitude towards others.
5. Emotional management habits
Once your child enters kindergarten, they may face a variety of mood swings.
Parents need to teach their children how to manage their emotions. For example, how to communicate with teachers or peers when encountering problems, how to comfort yourself when encountering setbacks, etc.
This will help the child to better adapt to kindergarten life and reduce anxiety and stress.
Finally: in order for children to adapt quickly to kindergarten life, parents need to provide them with a safe, stable and socially conducive environment that will prepare them psychologically.
As parents, we should strive to create a family environment that helps our children successfully pass the important stage of kindergarten and lay a strong foundation for their future.