Today we will talk about a situation in marriage, that is, marriages in which women are strong and men are weak. So can a marriage where a strong woman and a weak man are happy? In the process of our recent consultation case, we found that it was summed up one point: this woman is particularly strong in her feelings!
For example, if you are very eager to control the other party, you feel that you are right, or many things will set a standard for this husband, such a strong party, this marriage is easy to go wrong. Since most of the people who come to me are women, can she be aware of this problem? She was actually aware of it, so why did she do it? Today I will tell you: what are the problems in the marriage of strong women and weak men? How can we improve?
First of all, I am very understanding of female friends, why do they have such a strong side? Do I want to? In fact, isn't it tiring to be strong? Obviously, I can be protected and loved, but I prefer to deal with everything myself, so where is the root cause of this problem of strong women and weak men? Just out, strong women and weak men, you are not really you, what do you mean?
I summarize, a lot of women are strong, where is the strength? Strong on the mouth, hard in the mouth! Nothing, just a mouth thief hard! And where is the weak and weak? Weak on the inside, fragile! Psychologically speaking, why does a person show a very strong side? Most of them are hiding their inner vulnerability and insecurity.
You think about whether you would feel insecure if your personality was strong, or rather, lack of attention in this relationship, etc., so you see, this is not the real you! You also crave to be pampered, but there is no way, as if you don't get that pampering, so you have to make yourself strong, look strong, be strong, and so on.
But what is this feeling for men? First, he feels like you don't need me, and second, I feel like you're controlling me. It seems that everything has to be done according to your ideas, then he will have a strong sense of oppression and negative emotions, and under such a feeling, marriage is really difficult to manage!
Because you disguise yourself, can men see that you really need it? Can you produce, normal emotional flow with you? It's not easy. So what do I suggest to everyone? There is no problem with strong women and weak men, but you have to turn this upside down, where are you going to be strong? Not strong in the mouth, but strong in the heart. Being strong inside is actually the basis for you to build a happy marriage!
How to build inner strength? First you have to accept and recognize yourself, you have to tell yourself that you deserve to be loved! You definitely have to learn the right way to manage feelings, why? Because this is your ability to master happiness, you have to understand men's feedback in a positive way, what does that mean?
Let me give you an example, for example, before you told a man something he wouldn't listen, so it would make you feel like he wouldn't listen to anything I said, so I had to ask him harshly before he could listen, or force him to listen.
When you say every time he doesn't listen, in psychology, we have a thing called: learned helplessness! You will feel that he does not listen, and I can only force him like this. What does that mean? Explain that you may use the wrong method of communication, when you use the right method, you can feel that the other party listens, and when you have the right communication, this is a good feedback, this feedback will also give yourself an encouragement, this is the first: you have to be strong, strong in the heart, strong confidence!
Where should the weak be weak? Weak in your language, weak in your behavior, that is, we say weak, showing weakness can satisfy a man's sense of achievement, sense of existence, and showing weakness will also make him have a desire to protect, feel that he can protect you, he will also feel that you need him, this is a normal flow of feelings.
On what basis is weakness based? Based on your inner strength, so you see that women are strong and men are weak, strong should be strong in the heart, weak can show weakness, this is like we are in interpersonal communication, it is the same, a person especially likes to brag, blowing around in fact, there is nothing, are you willing to get along with him? But if a person is very capable, but superficially modest, you enjoy getting along with such a person.
So you can reverse the order in which you are in marriage, to strengthen your own heart, but also to learn to show weakness, and finally hope to help everyone's feelings.