People's emotions and feelings, career and even health, have a close relationship, we all know that a person's long-term anxiety and depression, sadness, anger, depression is likely to lead to high blood pressure heart disease, and even psychological or mental diseases.
Therefore, the close relationship between emotion and health has also been verified in psychology through countless experiments, and there was an experiment done with animals that kept two monkeys in an iron cage at the same time, one can move freely, and the other is trapped on the edge of the cage and cannot move freely.
There is an insulating rod on one side of the cage, and when the experimenter applies electricity to the cage every half minute, the free monkey can grab the insulating rod to protect it from electric shock.
After the experiment began, the free monkeys were afraid, always thinking about grabbing the insulating rod every half a minute. The unfree monkey can only resign himself to it, but he is also very calm.
After some time, a physical examination of the two monkeys found that the free monkey had canker disease, while the unfree monkey was unharmed.
This experiment shows that long-term bad mood is the cause of the occurrence of disease.
Whether at home or abroad, in the medical process, you can also query, a person who has been depressed, anxious, angry and stubborn personality for a long time is more likely to suffer from various diseases.
However, if there are people who eat grains and grains who are not sick, who experience the vicissitudes of the world, who may be smooth sailing without experiencing setbacks, in fact, those happy people who see them may not be god's darlings and lucky people, but their thinking and cognition have changed.
If you analyze it carefully, it is not difficult to find that people who have achieved happiness in mental health often let go of these obsessions.
Let go of the obsession of always comparing with others
Sometimes people are unhappy, not purely the disaster encountered, but the inner sense of comparison and gap.
Half of human suffering comes from desire, half from comparison.
So one of the important reasons that affect our emotions is to constantly compare, but when endless desires and endless comparisons, they will continue to entangle and affect our lives, which will form endless pain and suffering.
Compared with Rockefeller, we are all beggars, compared to the depressed people, we are all very happy, there is no need to deliberately extreme comparison or let go, calm the mind, give up the obsession with desire and others, you will find that there may be many goals that have not been achieved, not surpassed, but at the same time they have not a lot.
Giving up obsession is not to go with the flow, but to be able to face yourself and life more rationally and truly, use the best state, use your own ability to create a better life, enjoy the beauty of the moment with your heart, not afraid to continue to fight, and will not be inferior or resentful because of the gap.
Let go of the obsession of always needing to be understood and accepted
The need for security, both spiritual and material, and being understood and accepted is a very direct way for us to obtain happiness, but once we live by relying on the feedback response of others in the relationship, we are destined to completely surrender our happiness and rights to others.
One of our greatest sources of suffering may stem from not being understood, not being understood, but understanding is a false proposition, because there can never be pure empathy in this world, let alone unconditionally identifying with the ideas of others without experience.
The lover's "understanding" at the beginning is just what you say is right, the "understanding" of the family only stems from the blood connection, the wound on your body, the pain in the care of his heart, and the understanding of others may be to save face, do not want to tear the face, it is also likely to be too lazy to argue with you.
Everyone is an independent individual, and not seeking the understanding and acceptance of others is a sign of adult growth.
Therefore, no matter what relationship is managed, only by first finding oneself and reaching oneself in the process of getting along can we achieve transformation and have the initiative to control the relationship.
However, those who really let go of the harsh demands of others will naturally not be easily affected by the attitude of others, and will also get more possibilities.
Let go of the obsession with the ideal love
Love is beautiful for countless people, but the reality is just the opposite, countless times, it is those who once thought the most beautiful things finally hurt themselves.
Is there really love in this world? There must be, but most people, including ourselves, don't really understand what pure love looks like.
Because how much defined love is rendered by art, it will overly idealize the appearance of the lover and the relationship.
Giving up the obsession with ideal love is not indifference, but better, more rational face of the emotions between the two sexes, everything is too late, not overly idealized, not too much sacrifice, will not be because of the gap and grievances in the heart and hysterical emotions, the attitude is peaceful, sometimes the relationship will be more harmonious and better than they think.
It is said that no desire is rigid, in the feelings, less sacrifice, sincere attitude of people, in fact, can recover the "cost" is the largest.
A person's mental health, too often is not an organic lesion, but emotional thinking into the wrong area, when you feel that everything is very bad, can not move forward when you should realize that it is time to turn, rather than stuck in place and fight with yourself.
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Text/Relief Emotional Station
(Author: Xiao Yu, psychological counselor, focusing on the emotional field), good at the restoration of romantic relationships, marital contradictions and differences, and the healing of psychological trauma caused by the original ecological family. The lonely journey of life, listening to your grievances and pressures, helping visitors improve their skills in getting along with the sexes, saving their lovers, managing their feelings, and striving to become happier people.