"I knew this earlier, I would rather the baby did not show up, at home to eat the old", this is the words that Aunt Wang said when talking to Aunt Zhang.
Aunt Wang and Aunt Zhang are old friends for decades, the friendship between the two people is very deep, although the usual communication is not very much, but the two people meet or like a family happy.
However, after all, it is two families, and when discussing certain things, it is not necessarily the real idea that they are talking about.
For example, when Aunt Wang talks about her son, she often looks very proud. Aunt Wang's family conditions are relatively good, and she pours a lot of educational resources into her children, and her son also lives up to expectations, has been studying very well, after going to college, he found a good job and worked as an executive in a multinational company. From this point of view, it is true that Aunt Wang should be proud, after all, her son is so outstanding.
However, once when Aunt Wang was talking to Aunt Zhang, she finally couldn't hold back. When talking about her son, Aunt Wang was still very proud, but when she spoke, she shed tears, and finally Aunt Wang couldn't help but tell Aunt Zhang that although her son said that he was very capable and had a good job, the nature of his work often led to his inability to be at home and needed to travel around the world.
In addition, now the ideas that the son is exposed to are becoming more and more international, and slowly diluting the family affection, the son is now more rational than emotional for himself.
Some time ago, he fell ill, although his son sent a lot of money to his home, he also hired a high-level nanny and special care, but his son did not come to visit him once.
In the eyes of outsiders, Aunt Wang seems to be living very well, so good that everyone envies her, and her son is also filial piety, but in Aunt Wang's heart, she is full of loneliness. Therefore, there is the opening sentence "I knew this, I would rather the baby did not show up, at home to eat the old" how many parents' voices.
However, there is some disagreement in this sentence.
● From the perspective of parents
Parents have worked hard all their lives and have raised their children very well in the end, but the second daughter cannot stay with her parents because of her career or other reasons, which seems a little inappropriate for anyone. After all, in everyone's cognition, parents give their children everything, and children should repay themselves.
In addition, in our traditional culture, "home" should be the kind of four generations in the same house, there are old and young in the family, every day will be happy and full, harmonious and peaceful.
If there are only widows and elderly people in the family, or only the younger generation, then the family is "incomplete". If it was before, people would even laugh at such families when they saw them, after all, people thriving is the perfect home.
In addition, filial piety is also a good virtue of the Chinese nation, children after growing up, should be the crow feeding back, the lamb kneeling milk, this is a very natural thing, and this kind of thing needs to be done by the children themselves, rather than by sending money, finding a nanny and other ways to cope, because this is a child's will, but also an attitude.
People's life is for its happiness and harmony, money and career are not as important as a warm home, even if the children are not out, parents will not be abandoned, even if the children are old, as long as they can accompany their parents, it is the greatest filial piety.
Just like Su Mingzhe in "All Is Good", although he "did not show up", he was sincere and wholeheartedly good to his father. What parents want is actually such a child, who can accompany their children in their old age.
●From the perspective of children
Parents hope that in their old age, they can have their children and grandchildren on their knees and enjoy the joy of the world, which is not excessive. However, Aunt Wang's sentence "I'd rather the baby not show up" is a bit excessive.
Although parents have the grace to nurture their children, they must know that everyone is a separate individual, has his own thoughts and lives, and we have no right to ask one person to sacrifice his own life to achieve another person's life.
Just like Aunt Wang's son, Aunt Wang has nothing to say about her son's nurturing grace, and it is also Aunt Wang's pride to cultivate such an excellent child.
However, Aunt Wang can't "rather he didn't show up" because her son could not accompany herself after success, and Aunt Wang only looked at this matter from her own point of view, but did not look at the problem from the perspective of her child.
If Aunt Wang's son quit his job because he needed to accompany Aunt Wang and became an "old man", then what if Aunt Wang couldn't get the money out of her family when she was sick? Will it be better to be sick with her? If the economic conditions in Aunt Wang's home are not good, then what does Aunt Wang eat? What does my son eat?
Speaking of the long term, if one day, Aunt Wang is gone, then what will this son do? Living an old life for a long time, this son must have lost most of his desire and ability to work, and his thinking is too dependent, and it is difficult to live alone.
Moreover, the son does not have a career of his own, and in the days to come, he is likely to become a "rescue target" of welfare institutions. Do you want to see your children become like this?
Therefore, as a child, you can not only consider accompanying your parents, but have your own career, so that you have the ability to filial piety to your parents, and only then can you let your parents live a peaceful old age.
epilogue
In fact, it is difficult to say who is right and who is wrong, just because everyone looks at the problem from a different perspective. However, objectively speaking, it is actually easier to achieve "both".
Children can develop their own careers, can maintain their own circle of life, but please take time to go home often to see, not to say more, small busy people every weekend to see their parents are not much, right? Busy people can still squeeze time to see their parents every month, right? Don't always have time with customers, there is no time with your parents, customers give you benefits, parents give you life.
(The pictures in this article are from the Internet, if there is infringement, please contact to delete)