01
Gao Yuanyuan starred in the "Perfect Relationship" was released, she played a 40-year-old strong woman Chen Shan in the play, she and her husband are a combination of strong women and weak men, and her husband almost gave up her personal career pursuits in order to fulfill her career pursuits, focusing more on the family and taking care of the family.
In the eyes of outsiders, she is a happy woman with a double harvest of career and family, such as a career in the sky, a happy family, a husband is very good, and she is fully committed to taking care of their family.
But in fact, their marriage has gradually had problems, his old Gongsun Lei and a woman named Wu Min are very close, and he is very caring for her, she has anything to say to him, and he will definitely listen around, she ran away from home and sent him her address, when she was uncomfortable, he would give her brown sugar water.
This kind of interaction between them has obviously crossed the line, and both people are people with families, it is obvious that Wu Min has a non-opinion on Sun Lei, she feels that her husband is not good, indifferent, does not care about her, does not love her, when she sees that other people's husbands are very good, very concerned about her, very caring for her, or a very family-oriented man, so she wants to be with him.
The relationship between Sun Lei and Wu Min has attracted heated discussions among netizens, discussing whether married people should keep their distance from the opposite sex?
02
I think married people should keep a certain distance from the opposite sex, note, I am talking about a certain distance, not maintaining an absolute distance, not that two people can not speak, the distance must be more than how many meters, because this is impossible, everyone as long as they live in the world must need to deal with people, it is impossible not to deal with each other because this person is married.
Rather, it means to stay within a certain distance, there are boundaries between each other, and when the boundaries are reached, you should go back. Sun Lei and Wu Min are two people who don't know how to keep their distance, and the two of them are too close.
Chen Shan said that Sun Lei is such a person, especially good to people, can not see others suffer a little grievance, as long as others are wronged will reach out to help each other, he is a big warm man, everyone is warm. It's a habit.
It is precisely because he is too warm, so he will be targeted by Wu Min, her marriage is really too bad, although married to a very rich husband, but the husband does not respect her, nor does he care much about her.
Wu Min deliberately approached Sun Lei, and her approach had a strong purpose, that is, to get him.
And Sun Lei's closeness to her not only did not refuse, but also made a warm response, caring for her, taking care of her, giving her care beyond the normal relationship between men and women, and he himself did not realize that he had crossed the line? I think he was aware of it, but he himself was enjoying the feeling of being close to another woman.
This kind of behavior of his, for his marriage, for his wife, has already caused harm, and if it is not imposed, then the consequences are unimaginable, because Wu Min is close to him with a purpose, and sooner or later, something will happen to them.
03
Is there pure friendship between a man and a woman? I believe there must be some, but very few, two opposite sexes are very close, there must be one party is a plan, once there is a plan, the friendship between them can not be pure friendship.
The men and women who can really produce pure friendship must be those who do not have any ideas about each other, do not want each other to be their own objects, and do not want to become each other's objects, because without this idea, they can be purely with each other.
For those men and women who have been married, if they do not maintain a certain distance from the opposite sex, two people spend more time together, even if it is just a chat, there may be some different feelings, these feelings will slowly become love, and then extramarital affairs.
Extramarital affairs are one of the killers of marriage, and even if they do not divorce in the end, they have caused a lot of emotional damage to the couple's feelings, which is inevitable.
If you want to avoid it, you should first solve this problem from the source, that is, maintain the due distance between the opposite sex.
As mentioned earlier, it is not that there is no contact at all, because if it is a colleague, there will definitely be contact, and if it is a partner at work, it will not avoid contact, but it means that there is a certain sense of boundaries.
Normal work contacts and normal dating are completely ok, but for example, things that involve some more personal things that will make your partner feel comfortable, such as giving each other extraordinary care, should be eliminated.
04
The occurrence of feelings between the opposite sex is actually very delicate, perhaps the parties do not know, how to have feelings, feelings, is produced between a back and forth.
When the other party is looking for you, you always respond quickly, when the other party needs your help, you also jump out at the first time, you accompany each other to chat, accompany each other when the other party is difficult, these may make the relationship between the two become intimate.
And once the sense of intimacy is generated, the feelings between the two will change, more ideas will be generated, they will want each other to have more companionship, they want each other to help themselves at all times, they want each other to bring warmth to themselves, and so on.
This is the result that not maintaining a sense of boundaries and not keeping a distance may eventually bring, and this result is a huge blow to a marriage, which can be said to be devastating.
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Article illustration | stills from "The Perfect Companion"