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I don't know when academic qualifications seem to become the criteria for testing whether a person can succeed.
Most people take it for granted that as long as their children are admitted to 985 or 211 key universities, they will be able to get ahead after graduation and easily achieve the small goal of tens of thousands of monthly salaries.
But in fact, most students are like ordinary students, with their own troubles and dilemmas.
There is a very special chat group on the Internet, the name is called "985five=985 waste", it can be seen that these people are using English harmonics to imply their high scores and low energy and high and low life.
These children who are admitted to famous schools but cannot achieve their ideals in life warm up to each other in this group, share their grievances and experiences, and seek ways to get out of difficulties from others.
Perhaps others are also worried about their future, after all, these children study in prestigious schools and enjoy better teaching resources from an early age.
They have mastered the best development platform, have a suitable learning atmosphere, and have accumulated certain professional knowledge themselves, which is reasonable to say that they are the best pillars to contribute to social development.
But these proud sons of heaven who stood out in the competition have now become a burden to their parents. What is the cause of the sadness of tens of thousands of geniuses?
Before graduation, they all have a beautiful plan for their future, and many people have been "other people's children" since they were young.
They are very satisfied with their achievements, and some even think that they are a genius, should be smarter than others, and do things better.
But after graduation, they gradually discovered that there are people outside the people, there are mountains outside the mountains, and they can't always be the top one, such a psychological gap makes some people unable to accept the reality and fall into a long-term downturn.
After trying to work, they also gradually realized that good academic performance does not mean that they are able to work.
In fact, as early as a few years ago, people have begun to criticize those high-scoring and low-energy students, as if their intelligence can only be used to learn knowledge, but they are like a stupid child at work.
They may be good at coping with exams and can always get good grades, but they often encounter problems at work and can't even handle basic interpersonal relationships.
In the past, these children often refuted each other with a straight face, believing that they could gain an advantage in learning and stand out at work, and after they graduated, they had to gradually accept the reality and admit that they did have shortcomings in their work.
It turns out that the ability to learn is also like the strengths of music painting, but it is only one of its own advantages, and it cannot represent the whole story.
After entering the society, the people around them no longer regard the heroes as points, so the number of people who are willing to worship and respect them is gradually reduced, which will also bring some psychological gaps to these high-achieving students.
Because they are in a competitive relationship at work, these high-caliber students often feel the indifference and hostility cast by others.
In fact, entering a prestigious school does not mean that life has reached its peak, and those students who have been dissuaded because of their absurd studies are also everywhere.
For high-talented students, if they want to improve their competitiveness in social work, they should cherish the hard-won college time, make good use of this time to enrich themselves and improve their work ability.
There are some people who have always been praised as excellent students in the past, but when they enter the elite schools, they are surrounded by the same excellent people, which gradually dims their light, and sometimes they even become the middle and lower reaches of the class.
Some high-achieving students are because they have not been able to adjust their mentality in time, resulting in their laziness in college, and they are even inferior to some undergraduate students after graduation.
Because these students are often limited by their noble and prestigious status, they are not willing to set their sights on those small and medium-sized enterprises that are developing, and their job search goals are often some famous manufacturers in the industry.
However, for these talented manufacturers, in addition to valuing the graduate school of the job seeker, they also pay more attention to a person's ability.
In fact, in addition to high-achieving students graduated from famous schools, students who have graduated from ordinary schools and even junior high schools often feel such confusion.
That's because in the old days, these children have never really taken control of their own lives, and everything they have been planned by their parents and schools, just need to follow the plan step by step.
But the graduation work often needs to be decided by themselves, after entering the university campus, no one plans for their lives, and those people will fumble aimlessly, often wasting valuable time.
There are also some people who accidentally take a detour and waste too much time in an area that is not suitable for them.
These highly talented students who graduated from 985 colleges and universities sometimes feel that they have become a burden to their parents, usually because there is a big gap between the ideal self and the real self.
Psychology once proposed a theory about the self gap, in simple terms, a person can be divided into three parts, the real life self, the ideal self and the self that should be.
In simple terms, these three concepts refer to what kind of person a person thinks he should be, what kind of life he wants to live, and what kind of person he should be.
Before officially entering the society, people have been instilling a concept in these elite students, that is, they have enjoyed too many resources and stood at a higher starting point in life.
This has led to these elite students often setting themselves a goal that is too high, even if their own ability can not reach that peak, they will still stubbornly believe that only if they achieve that goal, they can meet the expectations of others.
When they find that no matter how hard they try, they can't achieve that distant goal, they will have a strong sense of gap, and in the long run they will naturally feel that their lives are meaningless, as if they have become a burden to others.
In fact, learn to recognize yourself, properly let go of some obsessions, life will become much better.
- The End -
Author | Tommy
Edit | Rain
The First Psychological Writing Group | A group of young people who like to look up at the stars
参考资料：Vogel, D. L., & Wester, S. R. (2003). To seek help or not to seek help: The risks of self-disclosure. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 50(3), 351.
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