As a full-time emotional counselor who has counseled with thousands of people over the years, you can imagine how many people often come to me and ask how I know if a relationship is worth saving. People know that the process of getting an ex back is challenging, and they want to know if they have a chance to succeed, but they also want to know if it's worth it.
Because I'm asked this question a lot, I feel like this topic is worth writing an article on. In today's article, I'll cover how to determine if your relationship should be fought for and how to continue.
One of the interesting things I've discovered over the years is that we almost always know the answer, but it's often buried deep in confusing thoughts and it's hard to find it. Therefore, I can't sit here and give you a generic answer.
How to know if a relationship is worth saving: Make a choice
Every relationship is completely unique. They all have intricate relationships, storylines, ups and downs, and involve many different types of personalities. So I can't sit at this table and give you a one-size-fits-all answer.
I want to make that clear at the outset. I can't tell you, "Yes! You have to fix the relationship right away, "or, "No, you need to turn the page and never look back." "
What I can do, however, is to provide you with important factors for you to remember and analyze that will help you determine the right course of action.
The future of your relationship is in your hands, and it's up to you to decide if the relationship is worth saving. It's important to understand this because the choice to save the relationship or move on needs to come from you, and it's just you. Otherwise, it will affect your handling of the situation.
I mention this because a lot of times people feel pressured to choose an option and they end up regretting that decision because it's not their own decision.
So, here are some signs you can consider that will help you make the choice that works best for you
Whether the relationship is worth salvaging: Signs to watch out for
To help you find some definitive answers in this situation, there are some signs that your relationship is worth saving and needs attention.
The most important thing throughout the process is to make sure that you will adopt the right mindset. I want you to think, "I know my worth, and I'm going to make an informed decision about whether I should save the relationship." "
Should I save the relationship: the value system
One of the most important factors, and whether or not this relationship should be saved, is whether your value systems are aligned. Having the same values is one of the foundations of a relationship that can stand the test of time and all the challenges of life.
When you ask yourself, "Is this relationship worth it, should I fight for it?" "Ask yourself if you have a consensus on how you see yourself and how you see your role in the world.
Do you have common plans and life goals, do you feel aligned with each other, do you want the same thing? Are you willing to work towards these goals as a team?
Some of the important factors to consider include how you see the future, how you want to raise your children, what values you will teach them, how you prefer to be educated, and what is most important to you.
Reading this, some of you may say that your values are exactly the same, but the two of you are entangled in those little things. "We want the same thing in the future, but he always forgets our plans," or, "I always find out she's lying!" "
So when it comes to being together and determining if you should fight for the relationship, think about how these little things represent a person's value system.
So when you ask "is it worth saving", it has nothing to do with what your partner or ex did, but rather how their actions represent their value system, and whether that value system is consistent with your value system.
So if you really feel like your values are aligned, then I would say the relationship is worth saving. Trivial problems can be solved, but core values are fixed.
If the relationship and the person are putting pressure on you to do something and accept something that completely goes against what you really believe and agree with, then the relationship may not be for you.
Whether my feelings are worth saving: Think about the challenges your relationship faces
Another useful thing when you want to save your relationship is to think about the challenges that exist when you're together.
One of the exercises we do with our clients involves having them write a detailed list of all the things that got them here. I want you to write down all the things that have kept your relationship in trouble, no matter how big or small.
Do you feel like you're taken for granted? Is it true that one person gives more than another? Is it because of lying? Is it a matter of punctuality?
In a nutshell, what exactly makes you wonder if the relationship is worth saving. The more detailed you write, the easier it is to have a clear picture of the situation, and then you can start analyzing.
The next step is to start exploring how to fix these issues and if they can be solved! What kind of long-term solutions can you come up with that can protect your relationship in the future?
Remember, we need to pay attention to your behavior because you have no control over what your ex will and won't do. You can control your own behavior, and only you.
Think about how you can fix the relationship if your partner isn't willing to stick out a finger. They may help if you get back together, but the best thing to do is to focus only on what you can do.
Now, when you're exploring these solutions, if you feel like you're going to have to fundamentally change the way you are and compromise on what you think is right or wrong, then the relationship may not be worth saving.
If you start to realize that in order to maintain the relationship, you will have to ignore yourself, things will become clear. You have to protect yourself from this kind of thing and be especially careful about toxic relationships.
When you know clearly that it's worth it, how to fix a relationship
If your relationship only needs a little change to last, then saving it is a good option. We all have bad habits and areas for improvement, but these are things that can be changed. No one is perfect, and it is important to remember this.
If you're looking for one-on-one guidance on how to get through this challenging time and reassemble the pieces to lay a more sustainable foundation, don't hesitate to contact Phil. Phil can help you achieve your goals while avoiding common mistakes.
You can also leave any questions you may have in the comments section below and Phil will be happy to give you an answer
I wish you all the best in your life and love.
Like what you just read? I want to know what you think about it. So, leave a message in the comments section. In addition, remember to search for Fei on WeChat to talk about emotions, pay attention to Fei'er, Fei'er guarantees that Fei'er will become the lucky charm of your beautiful love life.