What does first love mean to us? A sentence from the movie poster tells the truth: "First love is like a bag of red bean ice, which dissolves in the blink of an eye, and what can be tasted is the sweetness hidden in the heart with a slight greenness." ”
"First Love Red Bean Ice" is Chen Qingxiang's first love film, the film tells the story of a group of young people in Malaysia growing up, this is an era without mobile phone network communication, simple rural life records their growth. This is a typical literary film, and the story told, although bland, can give people a warm experience, which is also the success of the film.
When it comes to "first love", each of us will tremble in our hearts, but life cannot be as first seen, and the first love will be drowned in time without good, and all the touch and sweetness will be frozen in the time of youth. When I was 18 years old, after kissing her face, we thought we could go forever with her, but the reality is that you still haven't come together, and the beautiful promise of being together has become somewhat ironic because of the separation.
Why do we have a grudge against our first love? There are 1,000 Hamlets in the eyes of 1,000 viewers, and some people may say that first love teaches us what love is, and some people will say that first love is more simple and special, and some people will say that even if you are married, it is difficult to forget your first love. In fact, this is a typical feature of the "first love complex", which wants to be forgotten but lingers.
Definition of first love complex: "Mainly refers to the unforgettable first love, because there are too many firsts that occur in the first love." Having an innocent personality at the age of the beginning of the love sinus, encountering a pure love, even if it is still unforgettable to recall after breaking up for many years, after all, such a relationship, without any impurities, is simply like the feeling of a person. ”
Next, I will combine the content of the film "First Love Red Bean Ice", and then talk about the troublesome topic of "First Love Complex", and at the same time I will also talk about my thoughts and opinions in combination with real life, how does first love exist for us?
<h1 class = "pgc-h-arrow-right" >, the cause of the "first love complex": The young botak in the film fell in love with Zhou Anqi, a girl from a single-parent family, and the ignorance and shyness of the first opening of the love dou made him dare not express his inner love</h1>
What was it like to like it when you were young?
The liking of youth is the most amazing time in a person's life, and when two people can't help but look at each other, they immediately dodge away. In the quiet, I couldn't help but want to sneak a peek at the other person, the warm orange sun sprinkled on your face, and every fine fluff on your face was plated with a dazzling light.
Like is wanton, love is restraint. The botak in the film has silently followed Zhou Anqi since he was a child, and his penchant for this kind of like is blatant but careful. To some extent, botak is a shy and shy boy, although shy to express but carefully observed, in the face of the girl he likes, he can clearly understand the meaning of the other party's hand.
At the same time, botak's liking for Zhou Anqi has penetrated deep into the marrow with the passage of time, perhaps the young likes are too beautiful, even if it is a crush, it seems so intoxicating. Unfortunately, this shy boy never took a brave step, and every time he plucked up enough courage to confess, he finally turned back for various reasons, and the letter could not be sent.
In my opinion, although botak did not come together with Zhou Anqi in the end, perhaps this is the best ending. We can imagine, if there is no shyness and shyness, then the first love is still as beautiful as we think? The so-called unobtainable is always the best, so the first love is only suitable for us to stay in our memories, and occasional nostalgia will not be excessively sinking.
In real life, most people can't go to the end with their first love, which is a very important reason: that is, first love is often accompanied by ignorance, so because each other is not mature enough, it is difficult to go to the end.
Loved a classic line:
"After such a long life, I will not like you alone;
A lifetime so long, I didn't expect that I only liked you alone. ”
It's true that this life is a long one, so we want to be with the people we like. Growing up, we always think that we can meet better people in the future, however, with the passage of time, we find that no matter how the years pass, the aura of the person we once liked is still the same, and no one can replace it.
It is undeniable that as long as you are happy enough, then the first love will also be forgotten, just as the male protagonist in the film did not show his liking, but with the passage of time, he finally found that this feeling of liking was not as strong as it was at the beginning. Maybe the two will meet in the end, or they will still look at each other and smile after meeting, but in the end there will be no story.
<h1 class= "pgc-h-arrow-right" > second, the influence of "first love complex": With the passage of time, botak is still obsessed with the girl in his first love, and this joyful first love mood makes him always have a good heart</h1>
Regarding first love, there is such a classic line in the film:
"I don't know if it counts as my first love, but I'll never forget the taste, it's like eating the red bean ice in my mouth on the biggest afternoon, sweet and cold, so cold that my tongue hurts, but before I can feel the taste again, it melts away." 」
In the film, botak silently pays attention to the girl he likes, his likes to be serious and persistent and single-minded, and at the same time accompanies him through most of his youth. Fortunately, he still has a grudge against the girl he first loves, and this joyful first love makes him always have a good heart. The children who grew up with themselves were busy with their own affairs with the passage of time, and no one stayed or stopped somewhere for anyone, which was helpless and realistic.
In fact, many growth problems have been automatically solved with the passage of time, and small partners have left the townships where they once lived, and everyone is working hard in different cities. From this point of view, it is also reasonable that the two did not come together in the end, after all, two people who are not in contact will not have results in the end. The beauty of this film is that it does not idealize this feeling, but talks about real problems and intuitively shows it in front of us.
Back to reality, what kind of impact will the "first love complex" have on us? The answer is simple: if you fall in the water, you will not drown, you will drown when you stay in the water. Gathering and separating is something that each of us cannot avoid, and if we just stay in the memories of the past and can't extricate ourselves, then it is difficult to truly return to real life.
Although the film "First Love Red Bean Ice" tells a long-ago story, the sincere emotions contained in it are also very nostalgic. Whether it is friendship or family affection or the love we discuss, many of the plots in the film will also be reflected in our lives.
Guo Jingming once said: "The highest state of love is to be able to withstand the ordinary flow of years, hold my hand, and walk with your eyes closed and you will not get lost." ”
In my opinion, those who have a first love complex are not unaware, and sometimes they are not unable to change, but they do not want to change. It is precisely because I don't want to change, so I choose to continue to maintain the status quo, and eventually I will have such a feeling: the world is big, and I will go around and find that the person I love is still you.
<h1 class= "pgc-h-arrow-right" > three, how to get rid of the "first love complex" trouble: growth will make the past drift away from us, no matter how beautiful it was, it is difficult to return, face the reality to live better</h1>
Guo Jingming's understanding of the "first love complex" is as follows:
"Some people will always be engraved in their memories, even if they forget his voice, forget his smile, forget his face, but whenever they think of him, the feeling will never change." 」
It can be seen that the "first love complex" is lingering for most people, there is still a big gap between the ideal and reality, both the first love is beautiful but has become the past, and with the passage of time, it will gradually become dim.
In fact, in the film "First Love Red Bean Ice", the male protagonist's liking for the female protagonist can only be called unrequited love, and this kind of liking can also give it another title, which is crush. In the film, the son of the coffee seller, Botak, falls in love with Zhou Anqi, who dares to love and dare to hate, and this daughter also looks more courageous and strong on the outside, in fact, her heart is also very eager for stability.
Of course, the feelings of the hero and heroine in the film are very pure, botak's liking for Zhou Anqi is between friendship and love, in order to avoid destroying the original relationship between the two, I am worried that after saying this kind of like, the two will be like strangers. Therefore, botak buried his own liking deeply in his heart, this kind of youthful liking made him feel what is called heartbeat, want to hug but dare not reach out.
There is no denying that everything has a reason for existence, and if the first love complex is used on two people who like each other and are equally attached, then such feelings are very strong. If the first love complex becomes an obsession, or even idealizes this feeling, then it is difficult to truly feel happiness in real life, and sweetness and bitterness are often accompanied.
So how to get rid of the "first love complex"?
Since the first love complex has so many problems for us, how to get rid of this problem has become a problem that we need to solve, in fact, most people do not need to deliberately solve it, and these problems will be solved as we grow. However, there are still a few people who have this obsession, so you can try to use the following methods to resolve it:
(1) Try to get in touch with different members of the opposite sex
There are a lot of interesting and excellent people in this world, and at the end of the day, first love is only the existence of a specific period. Over time, we will know more people, so try to contact more to understand the different opposite sexes, so that we can no longer stick to the first love of this person in the memory.
(2) Constantly improve the connotation of self-enrichment
Usually, people miss their first love because reality is too vicissitudes, and in order to escape from reality, they think that first love is the most beautiful. So if you want to solve this problem, then you need to constantly improve your own connotation, I believe that with the improvement of personal charm, then interesting and excellent people will also be attracted to you.
(3) Reflect on and summarize the dialectical view of each other and oneself
Everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses, learn to look at their first love and themselves dialectically, whether it is the strengths and weaknesses of the other party, or the changes that occur in the process of growing up. Therefore, we must have a changing and developing perspective, and only if we can correctly look at each other and ourselves can we appear less idealistic.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" > written at the end</h1>
People are always obsessed with beautiful things, and in the film "First Love Red Bean Ice" we can see the beauty of this first love, and liking a person may not necessarily be with him. But if the other party can understand their own intentions and like themselves at the same time, then it is also a very fortunate thing.
The "first love complex" may have happened to each of us, but the people in the memory will never appear again, because they are too idealistic so they will not seem real enough, and with the passage of time, people from different paths will eventually drift apart.