The child is a replica of you, and your good and your bad will be copied and displayed in the child, and even slowly enlarged.
If you control your child by scolding, hoping that if you say it loud enough, the child will really listen, remember, and do a good job, then you will gain a grumpy, even violent rebellious child ten years later.
If you are not willing to "take time out of your busy schedule" to listen when your child has a desire to express it fully; if you forcibly interrupt and loudly rebuke your child when he says statements that do not meet expectations, then you will gain a lonely child who promises only promises and even silent autism ten years later.
Children hide in their own world
So, please think carefully about whether you really want to communicate with your child when you yell and scream, let him understand what you mean, or take the opportunity to vent your emotions. Teacher Fan Deng recommended to parents the book "How do you say that children will listen, how to listen to children will speak", reminding all parents and mothers, when communicating with children, please forget your bad emotions, with respect and love for his mood, patiently listen to him, and sincerely talk to him.
01 The child's love for you is hidden in the childish and clumsy expression, please be patient and listen
Xiao Yu Bao has been fond of graffiti since he was more than 2 years old, and often paints his hands and face in color. At the age of 3, it is even more exaggerated after the use of advertising paints, and often sits on the painting he has just painted without noticing, becoming a colorful little ass. Every time she saw this scene, Tang Ma, who washed a lot of clothes every day, had a nameless fire in her heart, and she felt that she was about to burst into anger.
Mama Tang looked at the picture with a crooked picture of a big rabbit and a small rabbit, surrounded by a big love. This is the limit of what a small soup bun can express in pictures, but her heart of loving her mother is infinitely rushing to Her mother.
The child's love for his mother
Tang Mama adjusted her breathing and expression, and slowly squatted in front of the small soup bun.
"Mom, I prepared a gift for you", when the small soup bag handed the paintings hidden behind her and sat down to Tang Ma like a treasure, her eyes were full of joy and expectation, this is a gift she has painted for a long time and prepared for her mother, and her mother will be very happy.
In fact, the child's needs are really simple, he just needs his parents to stop and listen to his thoughts. If you can treat him gently, he will surely grow into a gentle child, and he will be peaceful and firm in the face of things.
02 There are still many things for children to learn, please speak slowly
The child is a spirit of nature, likes to wade in the water on rainy days, likes to play in the sand pit, likes to pet the furry puppy, he does not know that doing that will make the clothes dirty, nor does he know that small animals may carry bacteria.
Kids love everything about nature
"Don't you know it's dirty?" If you say this and open the child's little hand with your hand, the child will be overwhelmed, will mistakenly think that other small animals are bad beings, and your words and actions will not only interrupt the child's momentary joy, but also beat the child into an indifferent person.
A child has come to this world for just a few years, learning to turn over, crawl, walk, talk, and never stop learning, but there are too many things that need to be learned, please tell him slowly, he will learn quickly.
03 Find your childhood self and communicate with your child as equals as a friend
Parents are also children, with their own little secrets, with their own little wishes, then find their childhood selves, like children to see the world, you will find that there are really many interesting things in life, you will have a lot of discoveries that you want to share.
There are many immatures in the child's heart, but he is also a complete individual, with his own thoughts and the need to control various small problems in life. Then sit down and have a good talk, just like listening to a good friend.
Children's recognition of the world is graded, their own parents and others. When he has grades, if his parents are a little dissatisfied with him, even if the whole world is praising him, he does not feel happy. When he encounters setbacks, even if everyone is criticizing him, as long as his parents believe in him and support him, he has the courage and ability to break through any obstacles.
Therefore, as parents, please listen to the voice of the child, please communicate with the child patiently, please let go of yourself and the child as friends, whether it is you or the child, you will get a different life. If you don't know how to listen and how to say, I recommend you to read the book "How you say children will listen, how to listen to children will speak", I believe you will find the answer, because you love children
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