On that day, I went to the compound of the village committee to do nucleic acid testing, because it was all tested by all staff, plus it was still a weekend, so the villagers in the near distance traveled with their children and daughters.
The sun was good, and as it approached noon, the number of people participating in the test had slowly shrunk, and many people had embarked on the return journey one after another.
There is a cherry orchard next to the road, it is the flowering season, the beautiful cherry blossoms in the blue sky and the eyes of the background, sparkling, let people can not move the eyeballs, regardless of men and women when passing by basically have to look at a few more eyes,
Others will walk into the garden, smell the flowers, or take a few photos of the flowers, this gift of nature can not be missed.
A little friend came over and shouted with joy: "Daddy, I want flowers, can you help me pick them?" ”
"The flowers grow on the fruit trees, so that they can wait for the flowers to fall, and then we can have a chance to bear cherries, and then we can eat the cherries, and now you pick them, and there will be no cherries to eat!" The father smiled and refused the child's request.
The child listened, did not cry, should have recognized the father's words, happy to enjoy the flowers.
After a while, another child came over with mom, dad, grandparents, and said, "I want flowers!" ”
"Grandma folds it for you!" Before the child could finish speaking, Grandma ran over and folded the largest flower on the tree and stuffed it into the child's hand.
The child was not so happy when he got the flower, and after playing for a while, he threw the flower on the ground casually, but the flower could never return to the branch, and it was impossible to produce a red cherry.
Two children, at their same age, encountered the same thing, but the response was completely different, and their future growth path can also be seen from it.
One child feels the boundaries and rules from an early age, vaguely knowing what can be done and what cannot be done; the other child is infinitely satisfied and pampered, too easy to get a flower, can not feel a sense of happiness, and it is difficult to have a grateful heart.
Such examples abound around, parents out of love for their children, try their best to meet the requirements of their children, but when the children get too easy, can not experience the hardships of parents, they can only see the bad of others, can not see the efforts of others.
The more the parent does, the more the child takes it for granted, and once the parent does not satisfy him, he feels that the whole world is sorry for him.
One morning, near class time, a mother took her child to school, and when she arrived at the school gate, the doorman let the child wear a mask to enter the school gate.
So the child's mother quickly opened the seat cover of the electric car and found a mask for the child, probably because there were too many things, the mask was buried in it, it was not very easy to find, the child was in a hurry, and began to rush at the mother: "You will not be fast!" ”
The mother did not have any words, just more panicked rummaging, and finally found, the child took the mask over, the head did not go back to the school, the mother in the back also said "do not take off the clothes" and the like, the child deaf.
"Just come early next time, don't complain about your mother." The teacher couldn't take it anymore and said to him.
"Just blame him!" The child responded viciously, and the mother's face was aggrieved and helpless, and with tears in her eyes, she sent the child away and rode away on the car.
When you meet such a child, you always feel very angry, but is it really the child who should be blamed behind it? No child is born to be such a "white-eyed wolf",
Parents' "hard work" has been exchanged for such a "white-eyed wolf"! So giving your child the right amount of love is really important.
So what to pay attention to in the process of loving children?
First of all
Children can know the care of cold and heat, but we must adhere to the rules and let the children have the concept of right and wrong.
For example, if a child does something wrong, he is not blindly covering up for the child, but telling the child that wrong is wrong, and he must have the courage to bear it, but parents will not love him because of this.
If the child cries and cries for something, he cannot give it unconditionally, but to see if he can give it, do what he can, let him know what can be satisfied and what cannot be true love.
If the parent does everything he should do for the child when he is a child, it is not only to deprive the child of the opportunity to exercise himself, but also to set up obstacles on the way for the child to develop good habits, the child will not feel that it is love.
At the same time, when he was a child, he let the child have a sense of rules, and to some extent, it is to prevent him from making big mistakes when he grows up and going to society to suffer big losses. Taking running a red light as an example, if a child who has a reverence for the rules will not ignore the traffic rules, he will not crash and die because of this, harming others and harming himself, so the sense of rules is not a small thing.
secondly
Love for children should be expressed in the right way.
The so-called love is deep and the blame is severe, but when the child is always blamed, it is difficult for him to feel the love from his parents, but he will accumulate hatred in his heart, or become inferior.
Therefore, what kind of way parents sometimes love their children and how much love they give their children is not the most important, whether the child can feel love, how much love can be felt, may be more important.
Sometimes when you see some parents with children, the child falls, the first reaction of the parents is: "You will not be careful, how many times have you said, look at the point road, is not long memory!" ”
At this time, what is the child's feeling? What parents want to express is obviously concern, and as a result, the words spoken become blame, and the child may feel very wronged after listening to it.
The distance between the invisible and the parents is a little farther, accumulating over time, more and more distant, the parent-child relationship is destroyed, but the parents feel that the child does not know gratitude, and he has broken his heart to manage him.
In fact, when the child falls, if the parents want to express love, they should care about whether the child is in pain, whether he is injured, whether he needs any help, if the parent can talk to the child in this way, the child can feel the love and warmth, and then persuade the child to slow down next time, he may be more able to listen to it.
Some parents feel that it is not strong, ah, the child does not have a long memory, but after the strong, the child really has a long memory? It seems that this is not the case, but more and more rebellious, more and more unable to listen to the words of adults.
It is easy to love children, but how to give children the right love is really a homework, and we need to work hard to pass this course and learn excellently!
Edit | Chen Yuanlong
Image | Chai Haohong
Check the | Dawn moon
Some of the pictures | Sourced from the web