Because of the work relationship, seeing many children holding their mother's thighs at the entrance of the kindergarten and not willing to enter the kindergarten, I often wonder what causes our children to be reluctant to go into the place that should bring them happiness.
Once, a 4-year-old girl clutched the seat belt of the car, refused to wear a school uniform, and did not get out of the car, and the young and fashionable mother was so sweaty that she had to treat the enemy like a barbarian and drag the child out of the car.
The cries of the child tear the heart and lungs.
The mother may have been obsessed with the work to be done, did not care about the child's feelings, took the school uniform and school bag that she did not wear, and sent the child to the teacher.
According to Western psychologists, the child's feelings today will be awakened at some point after growing up, and even accompany her throughout her life, and it will manifest itself in a name that we are all familiar with, "insecurity.".
As adults, we always inadvertently sow a seed for our children and affect the fate of our children's lives.
I am a father who is educated by his children
Like most people, becoming a father wasn't something I was all prepared for, it was an accident.
One day, my wife told me she was pregnant.
For the rest of the day, I continued to do my job, and even before my child was 2 years old, I didn't feel like A father.
Until one time, when I asked my two-and-a-half-year-old daughter to take off my slippers, she told me, "Do your own thing." ”
The whole family laughed, only I was stunned, the child did not say anything wrong, is that not what we usually say to her?
When she asked me to help, I often told her that she needed to pack her own things.
In order to adapt to the new role, I began to dabble in the basics of psychology to understand the role orientation of a child and a father.
The child's worldview
From the moment the child was born, her life entered a new milestone, and she became a qualified "social person".
The child inherits our innate skills, and knows what to eat and what to eat without learning; they take information from our expressions, languages, and intonations that they think are useful, and then meet her needs.
Most of us think of infants and toddlers as a blank sheet of paper, but the reality is very different.
Parents with children have an experience that children are more obedient in front of their parents and more arrogant in front of their grandparents and grandparents.
Children's self-learning ability is a problem that we as parents are often unaware of.
The child's world is always full of exploration and discovery.
About the AIC Principles
In the book "Giving Children the Best Growth", there is a chapter "The environment in which children are in is the classroom", the number of words is very small, but the impact on me is very large.
For the education of children, everyone has a set of their own value system, from the richness and diversity of society, no one way of education is wrong, but different education and guidance will form different social roles, but also make the world full of different wonderful.
Action, Improve and Change are the inevitable processes of a thing's development.
Educating children, adults often think that only by telling children what to do is it called "education".
"A good mother is better than a good teacher" tells us that the correct guidance and exemplary role of parents is the key to the healthy growth of children.
In essence, the AIC principle of parenting is not a tool for educating children, but a tool for self-growth as a parent. When we grow, children grow naturally.
Every parent regards their children as the most precious treasure, but we often take the heart of our beloved son in the wrong direction.
Educating children is confused, perhaps, we should act immediately, look at our own behavior and education methods, to find improvements or improvements, so that we can change, we can naturally see the child's change.
When we are able to put the AIC principles into practice, we will find that what will change may not only be the change of children, but also the change of the relationship between husband and wife, and even the change of family relationship.