01
The ancients said, "Forty is not confused, and fifty know the destiny." ”
But there are always people who, at the age of fifty, are still confused. No matter how big or small it is, I feel that it is particularly important, and if I deviate a little, I will fidget and be nervous all over my body.
In fact, a lot of suffering is in vain, but you can't get out of yourself.
Man, don't be cocooned, the second half is here, be an understanding person, I suggest you don't eat the following five kinds of suffering.
02
First, because the children are not out of breath, they are restless.
Last month, a friend cried to me: "My child actually retired to more than twenty in this exam, and he can't go to college in the future, what else can he do?" ”
As far as I know, this friend's child, in junior high school, has more than a thousand children in the whole grade of the school, and the number of rankings is not an absolute "indicator", the key is to see whether the child's performance is stable.
There are always some parents who are afraid of their children when they are young; children go to school, afraid that he is with bad classmates; children go to college, worried that he is not deeply involved in the world, cheated; children are employed, worried that the income is too small, and the work is not running...
Parents like to say, "When the child grows up, it will be fine." ”
But when the child really grows up, it is even more heart-wrenching. Fifty-year-old people, most of their children are adults, but excessive concern, disrupting the rhythm of their own lives, but also their life savings, a brain to their children.
There is a saying in the "Augmented Sage Text": "Children and grandchildren have their own children and grandchildren, and they should not be cattle and horses for their children and grandchildren." ”
As a parent, worrying too much about their children, and often tracking and directing their children, it will interfere with the development of their children and will not benefit anyone. Letting go and looking at it from a distance is the right solution.
03
Second, because I can't let go of my old love, I think wildly.
"When I am old, I will go to you, wait for me", this sentence, so that many people who "love but can't" have found a way out and also seen hope.
In fact, people will change, and feelings will also change.
The person you once loved deeply turned into someone else's bride, and you don't bother her, which is the best arrangement.
In "The Surprise of the First Shooting", there is a Lady Di who is married to a local official and lives a carefree life. During a trip, I met a white and pure scholar Fuji.
Both people have a good feeling, coupled with Fuji's bitter pursuit, it is logical to fall in love.
In ancient times, when a woman wanted to remarry, she could only wait for her husband to "write a letter of resignation." However, Madame Di did not wait for Hugh Shu, nor could she pull down her face, and did not dare to say her "love" through.
In the end, Mrs. Di did not think about tea and dinner, and her heart was very painful, and she missed each other.
"Ask what the world's situation is, orthodox people live and die", "lovesickness" is what it is, no one can say clearly, but it will really make people live a bitter life, and they can't find where the lesion is.
"The pillow person is the true love", fifty-year-old people, must remember this sentence. Without suffering from sentimentality, your family will be more harmonious.
04
Third, because it is impossible to see through life and death, it is unfounded to worry about the sky.
Zhuangzi said: "Look at its beginning and have no life, not the disciple is born but the original is invisible, not the invisible but the original is not breathless." ”
Man is originally formless, like air. See through, come and go like the wind, free. Those who are controlled by life and death instead regard "living" as a burden.
Psychologically, there is a feeling called "death anxiety", which is anxiety caused by the idea of death. That is to say, a person's mental problems lead to a good person, there are lesions, and it indicates extreme cowardice.
No one knows which one will come first tomorrow or the accident. The right thing to do is to live well today, regardless of what happens tomorrow.
When it's windy, you go out less, when it rains, you go out with an umbrella, when it snows, you look at the snow, and when the sun comes out, you feel warm... Spring has autumn flowers and winter has snow, any day, there is beauty, if you think about the time of survival every day, in fact, you have lost the gift of nature.
Life is a process, the length does not matter, fifty years old is already "knowing the destiny", do not calculate the rest of your life.
05
Fourth, because I have experienced too many things, I am constantly troubled.
As the saying goes: "People are better than people, and people are angry." ”
The same fifty-year-old person, but you are worse than others, more angry is that you put in more effort than others.
Few people regard "experience" as wealth, let alone "pain" as a blessing.
I like the saying: "Everything you go through is something you should experience, and no one can get around it." ”
People who are good to you, people who hurt you, painful things, happy things, are all coming to cross you, and when a person thinks like this, everything in the past can be looked down upon.
There are always some people, even if it is thunder and wind, can sleep soundly, and some people shout in the ear, and they will not wake up. You may think that he has no heart and no lungs, but in fact, he is just too lazy to calculate.
Life goes on, so why bother with rotten people and bad things?
06
Fifth, because I can't give up my desire, I am desperately trying to make money.
My third uncle, who had worked hard to cultivate more than ten acres of orchards, was reluctant to give the orchards to his children when he was sixty or seventy years old, preferring to manage them himself.
One day, the third uncle slipped under his feet, fell, and stayed in the hospital for six months.
On the day he was discharged from the hospital, he said: "They are all old people, why are they still desperately trying to make money?" Then, he handed the orchard to his son and went to the village every day to find someone to play chess.
Money is the basis for being a person, but at different ages, there should be different cognitions. In the second half of life, money is spent, rather than desperately increasing your savings.
"People's hearts are not enough to swallow the elephant", no one can say clearly, how much it will cost in a lifetime, but it is certain that if you insist on living a simple life, your expenses will be drastically reduced, and the pressure of life will be reduced by more than half.
Instead of coveting money, it is better to learn to "manage money", use the money in your hand, keep it, and the older you are, the more blessed you are.
07
There is some suffering that should not be endured, but you do not let go.
Life is full of spring breezes, but you are always afraid of ice and snow; there is sunshine in the morning, but you are still living in the darkness of last night.
It is a good thing to suffer hardships, but to wrap up the suffering of "unnecessary" on oneself is to cocoon oneself.
When we have a certain degree of satisfaction in our lives, we must learn to nourish life and not force perfect results in everything.
The suffering of life, without results, may be the best result.
Author: Cloth coarse food.
Follow my words and go into your heart.
The illustrations in this article come from the Internet.