The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has been a hot topic in family ethics since ancient times, and even in the noble imperial family, this relationship exists, let alone the ordinary people's family. As the saying goes, "it is difficult for a clean official to break housework", and the most difficult thing to break is to cut the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law who is still messy.
The marriage tragedies derived from the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are also innumerable. In the era of feudal society, women's status was low, and if they met an unruly mother-in-law, the hard life was indescribable.
If modern people encounter a bad mother-in-law relationship, they can also divorce and seek relief, but unless a woman is divorced, she will have to deal with this relationship for a lifetime. But even if you divorce your wife, you will be looked down upon, so no matter what, ancient women were a dilemma.
In the Ming Dynasty, there was a great Qing official named Hai Rui, who was known as the "Ming Dynasty Bao Qingtian" in the folk, and he was loyal and conscientious in official affairs. However, he did not have the decisiveness and firmness of dealing with the internal contradictions of the family, which made several of his wives suffer from the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
Dependent on the old mother
Hai Rui's ancestors were fujian people, and after moving to Guangzhou, he settled in the local area to reproduce his descendants. His ancestors had been officials in the dynasty since the Southern Song Dynasty, until the generation of Hai Rui's father, Hai Han, began to decline.
Haehan did nothing, and received subsidies from the imperial court every month to live. Soon after he married Xie, he gave birth to Hai Rui. Four years later, Hayhan died of illness, leaving the orphans and widows to live together. Xie Shi is a very strict mother and has high requirements for Hai Rui.
Before his death, Haihan left dozens of acres of land so that the mother and son could barely survive, although the life was poor, but Xie Shi did not neglect hai rui's education, because she knew that only by reading and taking the exam could she say goodbye to such a day.
As a result, Harry had little childhood and was accompanied by a large number of books every day. At the same time, Xie Shi did not forget to teach Hai Rui to behave in the world, so that he was determined to be a parent official who did not seek selfish interests, did not flatter the powerful and was clean.
Hai Rui was taught by his mother, and he never dared to resist his mother's words. In the twenty-eighth year of Jiajing, Hai Rui participated in the township examination to win the lifting. He then went to Beijing to participate in the examination, during which he presented to the imperial court that he had written his own "Ping Li Ce" which was valued, but he fell behind.
Returning to his hometown, he was ready to give up the imperial examination, and later he was hired by the Political Envoy Department of Hainan Chengxuan and became a teacher in Nanping County, Yanping Province, Fujian Province, which is also considered a civil servant of the Eight Classics.
Eight years later, he was appointed as the official official of Chun'an Zhi County. When he first arrived in Chun'an County, he saw that the local local gentry had occupied many fertile lands, causing the people to flee without land, so he re-measured the land and reduced the tax burden, so that many people could live and work in peace and contentment.
Here, he also settled many unjust, false and wrongly decided cases, and cleared the injustices for many people; he also cracked down on many corrupt officials and corrupt officials. His honest and honest way of serving as an official has been praised and loved by the people.
Divorced for the second time
Hai Rui was a clean and honest official, and it was very rare for him to be alone in the Ming Dynasty hall where bribery was prevalent, which also depended on the teachings of his mother Xie Shi for many years. Xie's upbringing Hai Rui has suffered a lot over the years, and Hai Rui also understands his mother's difficulties, so he is very filial to his mother.
There is a saying in ancient times that "no filial piety has three, no queen is greater", And Hai Rui, as the only son in the family, naturally has to take on this responsibility. Later, under the arrangement of his mother, he married his first wife, Xu Shi.
This Xu clan has all the advantages that an ancient woman should have, she is virtuous and virtuous, Xiu waihui, and with her running the family, Hai Rui can show her grand plans in the official arena without distraction. This was originally a good match, but Xu Shi has not been liked by Xie Shi after entering the door.
This mother-in-law and daughter-in-law conflict is on the verge of erupting, and Xie Shi is a strong woman, which can be seen from the way she teaches Hai Rui. And Hai Rui has formed a cowardly character that does not dare to resist under the strong pressure of Xie Shi for many years, so in this war between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, he will always be on the side of his mother.
Therefore, all the grievances could only be swallowed by Xu Shi himself, and she thought that as long as she had a son, everything would be fine. But God didn't seem to hear her prayers, and she gave birth to two daughters in a row, so xie shi was even more disgusted with her.
As Hai Rui grew older, the family wanted to have a son to continue the incense, so Xie forced Hai Rui to give up the Xu family. Hai Rui actually liked Xu Shi quite a bit, but his mother's order was the holy will, and he couldn't disobey it.
Later, under Xie's arrangement, he soon married his second wife, Pan. At this time, Xie Shi's own choice should always be satisfied. However, Pan Shi is not as submissive as Xu Shi, she is a woman with a strong personality, and when she encounters the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, she always pushes back the words.
The comings and goings also annoyed Xie Shi, but she also endured for the sake of the Hai family's incense. But later, Pan transferred his anger towards his mother-in-law to Hai Rui, and she directly separated from Hai Rui. Xie Shi angrily asked Hai Rui to give Pan Shi a break.
The two-time divorced wife also tossed Hai Rui enough, but Xie Shi had already issued a death order and vowed not to give up without having a son.
Manipulated marriage
After heeding his mother's orders, Hai Rui divorced his two wives, and then married his third wife Wang Shi under his mother's Zhang Luo. Xie Shi also summed up the lessons of the above two wives, and hai rui's third wife can be described as a careful selection.
After entering the door, the Wang family also lived up to expectations, and gave birth to two sons for Hai Rui in succession, named Zhongli and Zhongliang respectively, and later gave birth to a daughter. This can spoil the Xie family, and it is also very good for the Wang family, holding the grandson under Cheng Huan's knee every day.
However, soon after, Hai Rui suffered a change in the official arena. The then emperor, Emperor Ming Shizong, Zhu Houxi, ignored the government all day, but opened an altar in the imperial palace, coupled with the extravagant life, which made the situation between the DPRK and China changeable and unstable.
Seeing this situation, Hai Rui decided to impeach the emperor for various incriminating evidence, so he bought a coffin, settled his family, and submitted the written "Public Security Neglect". Zhu Houxi was furious after seeing this and sent Hai Rui to prison.
But later, after Zhu Houxi repeatedly read "Public Security", he felt that Hai Rui was a loyal minister who dared to speak out, so he released him. But when Harry returned home, his two sons and daughters had already died one after another, which was a huge blow to him.
But Xie shi completely ignored all this, and always wanted wang to conceive again to help the Hai family have a son and a half daughter, but then Wang never conceived a child again. Xie Shi was anxious and had the idea of letting Hairina concubine. Harry was very embarrassed at the time, because he had spent almost all his savings by marrying his wife three times.
He was a clean and honest official, and he only took twenty-four stones a month, which was equivalent to about three thousand a month in modern times. Moreover, all of them only rely on this little money to feed them, and now he can't even afford to eat meat, and he still wants to take concubines?
In desperation, Hai Rui could only find someone to borrow money, and soon married two concubines, Han Shi and Qiu Shi. But later, I don't know why, the concubine Han Shi hanged herself not long after marrying, and ten days later, Lady Wang also died one after another.
In the end, only Qiu Shi was left to accompany Hai Rui, but Xie Shi was still unwilling, praying every day that Qiu Shi could give birth to a child, but she did not see it until she died. In his later years, Hai Rui was also unsatisfactory in the official field, and eventually died of depression.
After tossing and turning for most of his life, the incense of the Hai family was also broken. Xie Shi became the manipulator of the whole thing, and Hai Rui was at her mercy like a marionette, so she buried the youth of so many women in vain, probably this is the so-called "foolish filial piety"!