"One kind of lovesickness, two places of idleness." She married Sun Yat-sen at the age of seventeen, bore him children, took care of his parents, and accompanied each other for decades, watching Sun Yat-sen grow from an ignorant teenager all the way to a lonely people's hero.
But she eventually separated from Sun Yat-sen, and when asked, she simply said: "It's not that My husband abandoned me, it's that I don't want to live a life of displacement with my husband anymore." ”
She has always been full of love for Dr. Sun Yat-sen, but this kind of love can not prevent the lover from finding a better and more appropriate, many words can not express love, and many of the love that has to be said eventually becomes a sentence of "Goodbye Sir." "There is a kind of love called letting go, and this woman who has the courage to let go is Sun Yat-sen's original wife Lu Muzhen.
Maybe it was wrong in the first place
Born on November 12, 1866 in Cuiheng Village, Guangzhou Province, Guangdong Province, Sun Yat-sen was not a well-behaved child since he was a child, he always showed a naughtiness that was different from his peers, and he also became a problem child in the eyes of his parents.
His parents had hoped to stabilize his character by reading, but as Sun Yat-sen read more and more books, the more "strange thoughts" in his head became. In desperation, his parents finally thought of the most traditional way - to start a family.
They thought that after letting Sun Yat-sen marry his wife and start his own family, he would relent and become a good family man who "followed the steps". In the eyes of Sun Yat-sen, his ambitions were far greater than his parents thought, and Sun Yat-sen hoped to completely save China from feudal society.
He had tried to rebel against his parents' arranged marriages, and the result was naturally a constant compromise. Sun Yat-sen still became close to the wife Lu Muzhen, whom his parents helped him find, but Sun Yat-sen did not have any feelings for this Lu Muzhen, and even carried a lot of disgust, which shows that this marriage may have been wrong from the beginning, and the outcome can be predicted from the beginning.
His dissatisfaction with his parents and feudal society was unconsciously transferred to this shy bride, so that Sun Yat-sen also forgot that she was also an innocent woman persecuted under feudal society.
Gentle and sensible
For a long time after that, Sun Yat-sen and Lu Muzhen were in a "different place" life, Sun Yat-sen occasionally went home to visit, Lu Muzhen did not get angry about this, nor did she feel anxious because Sun Yat-sen did not return home for a long time, because she knew that Sun Yat-sen had his own big cause to develop.
She only needs to help Sun Yat-sen take care of this "little family" is the greatest help to Sun Yat-sen. Although Lu Muzhen was "hard-plugged" to Sun Yat-sen by Sun Yat-sen's parents, Lu Muzhen herself was not completely feudal female thought, and she also let Sun Yat-sen see the shining points in her body.
In terms of taking care of her parents, Lu Muzhen has always been infallible and picky, and she has also taken care of this small home with warmth and cleanliness. Sun Yat-sen was most pleased with the fact that sun yat-sen brought home a Christian priest.
One day, Sun Yat-sen brought a Christian pastor home, and the two talked so much that it was too late, and Sun Yat-sen wanted to get his parents' consent to leave the pastor for one night. However, Sun Yat-sen's parents disliked these foreigners' high-minded talk all day and resolutely refused Sun Yat-sen's request.
At this moment, Lu Muzhen, while comforting her angry in-laws, whispered in a whisper: "No matter who it is, everyone who comes is a guest, and we should warmly welcome the arrival of the guests." Sun Yat-sen's parents, who were appeased and calm, thought about it and felt that it was reasonable, so they no longer pursued the problem of the pastor's stay, and constantly praised Lu Muzhen for being sensible and considerate.
And Sun Yat-sen also had a different view of her because of Lu Muzhen's behavior. Sun Yat-sen was not so annoying to her, and would chat with her from time to time, until seven years after the two were married, his son Sun Ke was also born smoothly and followed Sun Yat-sen to move to a new house.
Goodbye sir
As Sun Yat-sen's medical career continued, he also met many like-minded people during this period, who were also very dissatisfied with the feudal rulers, so they often gathered together to discuss the current political analysis, and in the long run, the people decided to plan a sensational movement to save the nation.
In 1894, the Xingzhong Association was established under the unremitting efforts of Sun Yat-sen, and Sun Yat-sen's "anti-Qing" struggle also began, and a year later, Sun Yat-sen launched the famous Guangzhou Uprising, but eventually failed and was even wanted by the Qing government, so Sun Yat-sen also began to flee.
And Lu Muzhen worried that the children in the family would be implicated, in order to make Sun Yat-sen have no worries, Lu Muzhen resolutely decided to take the child to the eldest brother Sun Mei, Lu Muzhen's decisiveness made Sun Yat-sen moved, and the two also ushered in the second child Sun Wan.
It was not until 1911, when Sun Yat-sen returned from abroad, that he had a more ambitious goal in organizing and launching the Xinhai Revolution. Sun Yat-sen could not rest assured of his wife and daughter, and returned to Nanyang day and night to meet with his family in a hurry to show peace.
Lu Muzhen knew that her husband was doing a great thing, and she also knew the burden on his shoulders, but when she heard that Sun Yat-sen had become the president, she deeply realized that the distance between herself and her husband was not simply measured by footprints.
In the end, the distance between the two is getting farther and farther, and it is no longer a feeling that can be saved by silently paying. In 1915, Lu Muzhen received a divorce agreement sent by Sun Yat-sen, and although she was very reluctant, she still firmly wrote a "can".
Shortly after the divorce, Sun Yat-sen married Soong Ching Ling, while Lu Muzhen never married and settled in Macau, but Lu Muzhen continued to follow in Sun Yat-sen's footsteps. Until 1925, when Sun Yat-sen died, she also wrote a eulogy for Sun Yat-sen, in which she said that her ex-husband Sun Yat-sen had "great spirit and great personality".
She even donated all the living expenses sent by Sun Yat-sen to her hometown, and used the money to build a school so that more people could read books. In 1952, Lu Muzhen died peacefully at the age of 86.
Looking back on their marriage, the marriage that lasted for more than thirty years ended with a divorce letter, during which there was no quarrel, no discord, just a more suitable person, and a thousand words finally converged into a sentence of "Goodbye Mr. "Mr. Goodbye".
brief summary:
Lu Muzhen's firmness was not based on Sun Yat-sen's original wife, she didn't even care about this name, she simply hoped to protect her small family, and her courage to dare to let go of love was also admirable.
Under the poison of the feudal system, Lu Muzhen did not become a product of feudalism, never complained about the world, and lived a strong life by relying on his own efforts bit by bit, and such a spirit is also worth learning.