preface
True love is based on the independence and equality of both parties, mutual appreciation, mutual understanding, and at the same time accompanied by each other. If one party is willing to pay silently for the other party, without asking for the other party's return and response, then in the long run, it will only make each other more and more distant, and love will deteriorate. Lu Muzhen is such a woman. Her marriage was arranged by the elders of the family, and without asking her for her opinion, she was allowed to marry a young Sun Yat-sen, whom she had never met. This is fortunate and unfortunate at the same time.
01
Born in 1867, Lu Muzhen's ancestors have been famous for several generations, because the family is charitable and charitable, so it is not small. Her father, Lo Yiu Hsien, went to Honolulu in the United States to do business when he was young, and he gained a lot of wealth and insight. Due to the relatively traditional family, As a daughter, Lu Muzhen did not receive a new education, not only did not read much, but also a small-footed woman, almost out of the door, often worked as a female worker at home. But she is kind, often taking her own money to help the poor in the vicinity, and she is also quite famous in the county.
Because the Lu family and the Sun family have always been close, the Lu family also knows Sun Yat-sen better. Father Lu once said that Sun Yat-sen read through political, economic and cultural knowledge and was a promising young man with a promising future. So when she was 17 years old, she listened to her parents' orders and married Sun Yat-sen, whom she had never met.
Soon after the new marriage, Lu Muzhen fell in love with this lively and enthusiastic man, he was not as serious as the adults in the family, often expressed his opinions on current political news, although Lu Muzhen could not understand, but she knew that her husband was not willing to be mediocre, and she also supported her husband's great ambition of serving the country and the people from the bottom of her heart. After marriage, Sun Yat-sen was often busy outside and rarely returned home, and even after returning home, he only had a few words of greeting and concern.
At this time, Sun Yat-sen was studying medicine in Hong Kong, hoping to heal the physique of the Chinese people and make the nation stronger. In the past few years of studying medicine, he has come into contact with many advanced ideas in the West, and he has also realized that China is being invaded by Western powers and is in constant danger of being divided. Therefore, he slowly turned his mind, gave up medicine, changed to politics, and wrote to Li Hongchang to expound his strategy for saving the country, but his ideas were not taken seriously at all. Sun Yat-sen saw the corruption of the Qing government and knew that it was impossible to save the people from fire and water by placing his hopes in a closed Qing court, so in 1894, Sun Yat-sen went to the United States to come to Honolulu and founded the Xingzhong Association, which means to revitalize China, advocate the overthrow of the imperial system, the restoration of China, and the realization of a republic. From this point on, Sun Yat-sen embarked on a difficult revolutionary road.
Lu Muzhen has been receiving a traditional family education, she has no opinion on her husband's ideas, but she is willing to support her husband, give him spiritual support, she strives to do a good job in housework, filial piety to her in-laws, so that her husband has no worries, at the same time, her virtuous name has also been recognized by her neighbors, and some people praise her for "filial piety and respect for the township party."
Because of sun yat-sen's career, he was always facing various crises and was often wanted, he often had to flee to various countries to avoid arrest, and his family often faced various dangers to his life. It was also Lu Muzhen's support behind the scenes, silently taking various risks, so that Sun Yat-sen could devote himself to the revolutionary cause. Sun Yat-sen saw her dedication and greatly changed her feelings, and his feelings slowly deepened.
After the success of the Xinhai Revolution, Sun Yat-sen was elected president of the Republic of China, and on February 15, 1912, Lu Muzhen and his two daughters went to Nanjing to meet Sun Yat-sen, and when passing through Shanghai, they were warmly welcomed by the members of the League, and everyone respected her as the "Mother of the Nation", which was recognized by everyone.
After Sun Yat-sen resigned as president of the Republic of China, accompanied by Lu Muzhen, he inspected the railways and industries throughout the country and prepared funds to build railways. In the nearly year of travels, Lu Muzhen gradually felt his own inadequacy, could not give Sun Yat-sen any good help, and slowly came up with the idea of finding a virtuous helper for her husband, and filed for divorce.
02
In 1913, the frustrated Sun Yat-sen came to Japan again. This year, Soong Ching-ling, who graduated from college, became Sun Yat-sen's secretary. Soong Ching-ling's father, Soong Ka-shu, and Sun Yat-sen were revolutionary comrades for many years, and after he met Sun Yat-sen in 1894, he has been following Sun Yat-sen's side, helping Sun Yat-sen raise funds, helping Sun Yat-sen propagate revolutionary ideas, and dedicating his life's energy to Sun Yat-sen's revolution. Soong Ching Ling had also heard many deeds of Sun Yat-sen since he was a child, and he had a kind of admiration for his idols. After she became Sun Yat-sen's secretary, she gave Sun Yat-sen great help in work and life, and also let the frustrated Sun Yat-sen get some comfort and encouragement, and the two people slowly developed feelings.
In September 1915, Sun Yat-sen sent someone to Macao to bring Lu Muzhen to Japan to discuss some divorce matters, and the elders of the League in Japan at that time opposed this matter, and some people also scolded Sun Yat-sen for being ungrateful and not remembering the old feelings. Lu Muzhen is very flat about this, she said that she can't give Sun Yat-sen too much help, can't solve his problems, and Soong Qingling is obviously more suitable for him, she is willing to let go. When she said this, it was not easy for others to say anything more, so Sun Yat-sen and Lu Muzhen formally divorced.
After divorcing the original partner, Sun Yat-sen immediately wanted Ton Ching-ling to marry, at this time Sun Yat-sen was 49 years old, nearly half a hundred years old, and Soong Ching-ling was only 22 years old, which was the same age as Hua. As a father, Song Jiashu naturally had a hard time accepting that his good friend wanted to become his son-in-law, and he firmly opposed this marriage and locked his daughter in the home in order to prevent them from getting married. But in the end, Soong Ching Ling resolutely escaped and held a wedding with the Sun Yat-sen she admired. Song Jiashu angrily broke off friendship with Sun Yat-sen and did not forgive Sun Yat-sen until his death.
03
The tragedy of Lu Muzhen's marriage to Sun Yat-sen is inevitable.
First of all, the difference in educational background, Lu Muzhen received a feudal traditional family education, taking her husband as the sky, without her own opinion, lacking personality independence, while Sun Yat-sen received a new-style education, full of poetry and books, to save the country and save the people as his responsibility, such an ambitious man, Lu Muzhen can not stop.
The second is to gather less and leave more, the long-term separation of husband and wife is the biggest weapon that destroys the marriage relationship, Lu Muzhen is a small-footed woman, weak and sick, dare not go out, and do not want to go out, especially as Sun Yat-sen's career is more and more successful, Lu Muzhen rarely appears in front of people, for fear of saying the wrong thing and losing her husband's face. And Sun Yat-sen is in his prime, and he is often worried, he needs his wife's company, understanding and understanding, and these, Lu Muzhen, who is far away from home, can't do it, so she chose to let go and give him better.
epilogue
After the divorce, Lo mu-ching has been living in Macau and has become a Christian believer. Perhaps it is the pain caused by marriage that she cannot heal herself, or perhaps it is that she has seen more life and death and is hurt by parting, and in her later years she lived a lonely lifelong unmarried.