When I was a child, people always looked forward to growing up quickly, because growing up meant maturity, and they would no longer be called childish.
However, although some people's bodies have grown and matured, their psychology or behavior is still childish. So what does it mean to be truly mature? The old ancestors warned us: Truly mature people, often these three abilities are very strong, let's take a look!
01
Self-reflection, play to strengths and avoid weaknesses
The first ability of a truly mature person is to "know the wrong of yesterday and take the strengths of the world." That is, they know what they have done in the past and know how to learn from the strengths of others. In this way, both learning and virtue can be improved day by day.
On the other hand, some mentally immature people in society are very arrogant, always arrogant, self-righteous, and unwilling to be responsible, blindly harsh on others, but never reflect on themselves.
For example: in the company and colleagues jointly in charge of a project, in the middle of the project problem, the boss came to ask the reason, they will immediately say: "I am such a smart person will not make such a low-level mistake, this thing really has nothing to do with me, blame so-and-so ..."
As everyone knows, the project is jointly responsible for you and your colleagues, there is a problem who can not get rid of the relationship, the so-called "one glory and prosperity, one loss and loss", the boss generally only looks at the results and does not look at the process.
In the eyes of your boss, this kind of behavior is psychological immaturity, escaping from the battlefield, and the lack of teamwork spirit will make the boss not approve of it, and it will also lose the trust of colleagues.
In fact, when encountering such a situation, you should reflect on yourself at the first time, whether there are any loopholes in the past work, and whether the cooperation with colleagues is in place? Instead of looking outward for excuses and evading responsibility.
By introspecting yourself, you can face up to the results caused by the accident, have the courage to take responsibility, and work with colleagues to find ways to minimize the loss and make the project develop in a good direction. In this way, you can also gain the respect and goodwill of your colleagues.
You know, everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses, in the process of work, if you want to make continuous progress, you must be humble, recognize yourself, but also be good at learning the advantages of colleagues, make up for your own shortcomings.
The same is true in life, getting along with family or friends, encountering disputes, you must first reflect on your own faults, do not impulsively hate each other, feelings need to be carefully maintained, do not easily destroy.
02
Keep your heart alone, keep your mouth shut in the group
The second ability of a truly mature person is to "close the eyes and observe the mind, and the mouth is closed to prevent disasters", that is, to know how to be cautious and self-disciplined, and to be cautious in words and deeds.
Thanks to the spiritual education of "five stresses and four beauty" that we have received since childhood, many people can consciously emphasize civilization, politeness, hygiene, order, and morality when they are outside, but as soon as they return home, especially when they are alone, they are exposed, and all kinds of rules are thrown aside and wantonly acted arbitrarily.
There are also some people who habitually disguise themselves, one set of people before and after the other, such as acting like a humble gentleman in front of outsiders, and as soon as they return home, they treat their families arbitrarily, act as a blessing, and live as a demon king of the world.
But the truly mature people are different, they adhere to the spirit of prudence and independence, strict self-discipline, even in the absence of any supervision, they can be consistent in appearance, consciously practice moral codes, abide by the rules.
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As we all know, with the development of society, the exchanges between people and people are also more frequent, and in daily life, we need to often attend various dinners in order to maintain interpersonal relationships. In these many situations, how to speak is an art.
Often on such occasions, some immature people, for the purpose of self-expression, like to talk about it, and even make strange moves to sensationalize.
As everyone knows, the misfortune comes out of the mouth, the more words will be lost, the more you say, the more likely you are to make mistakes, if you are caught by people with ulterior motives, it will inevitably cause all kinds of unnecessary trouble in the future. Moreover, such behavior is also very unpopular and even annoying.
And the more mature people are on such occasions, the more cautious they are, they will not easily comment on the words of others, nor will they follow the crowd, and when they have to open their mouths, they will also think again and again to take care of the emotions of the people around them. As a result, they can gain the favor of most people.
03
Indisputable with the world, strong yourself
The third ability of a truly mature person is "not to fight for gains and losses, but to seek one's own ability."
Do not compete with others for success or failure, stakes, shorts, strengths and weaknesses, only seek their own wisdom and talent. In this way, you can avoid worldly strife, rest assured of your own affairs, and slowly become stronger.
In this increasingly competitive society, many people will participate in the competition in order to obtain their own interests or get more effective resources.
In other words, where there are people, there is no way to avoid disputes, and most people will rivet enough to win or lose, as if they do not compete for their own chances.
But sometimes it's not necessarily a good thing that you win. For example, in the family, the husband and wife quarrel, the husband argues on the basis of reason, the husband wins the argument, the heart is complacent, and he does not think but hurts the feelings with his wife;
In the workplace, after the completion of a large project, the company pays bonuses, as a leader you want to monopolize the majority of the head, then your employees will be dissatisfied, the next time there is a new project, they are not so active, and even do not want to cooperate with your work, you are alone, in trouble;
Social occasions, because of different views on a certain thing, you have to fight with friends to get red in the face, until the other party takes the initiative to admit defeat, then you win the theory, but lose the friendship, after all, no one is willing to have a long-term relationship with a person who loves to drill the horns and wins and loses everything.
The same scene, if replaced by a truly mature person, their performance will definitely be different, and it will also produce different effects.
For example, when arguing with their wives, they will not be entangled, but will take the initiative to show weakness and let each other go, because they understand that home is a place of love, not reason. Only when the husband and wife get along harmoniously, the family will prosper;
With colleagues to share the bonus, as a leader they will not think of swallowing alone, but will be distributed according to the work, who contributes a little more in the project, but will also take into account the ideas of others, as fair as possible. Because they understand that only by achieving a win-win situation, everyone is willing to continue to cooperate;
When arguing with friends, they will not compete, but will respect each other's opinions and try to seek common ground while reserving differences. Because they know that everyone's way of thinking is different, so any problem is a benevolent person, and the wise person sees wisdom.
In short, truly mature people understand a truth: to be low-key, to converge personality, to hide sharp edges, to know how to give in everywhere, to put yourself in the shoes of others, then others will also like themselves in the eyes of the heart, willing to get along with themselves.
On the one hand, Taoguang cultivates obscurity, has no quarrel with the world, and has no trouble with people, which also means that his popularity will become better and he can meet the source in society.
On the other hand, by giving up fighting, you have more time and energy, improve yourself, improve yourself, make yourself more excellent, and do more meaningful things.
These are the three abilities that a truly mature person has, and if you have one, then it means that you are truly mature; if not, then you need to continue to work in this direction.
Finally, I hope that everyone can abandon childish psychology or behavior, become stable and mature, and move towards an ideal life.
Author: Mr. Senmei
Family affairs, state affairs, world affairs, a little knowledge of one or two; worry about the glass heart, explain three or four.
People have a thousand faces, things have everything, the world under the tip of the iceberg is the real world of undercurrents, and life needs to see through the eyes of illusions.
Mr. Qianmian takes you every day to see through the illusions of life and resolve the puzzles of life.
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