Some people say that writing about individuals one by one will learn to be human for a lifetime.
In the first half of life, the fight is birth and talent; but the second half of life depends on the pattern, is the character, and is the way to deal with the world.
Walking in the world, some people take wealth as treasure and pursue family wealth, and some people take the name of prosperity as treasure and pursue fame in the world.
As everyone knows, the treasure outside the body may be lost at any time, and the treasure internalized in the heart can last a long time.
For being a human being, the real rare treasures are hidden in these three things.
Psychologist Goleman once said, "The degree of comfort you make people determines the height you can reach." ”
In life, there is no shortage of grumpy and hairy people, and wherever they go, conflicts will go.
This kind of "discord" not only hurts others, but also is an unworthy internal friction.
In fact, treating people with anger and dancing their teeth and claws may be able to gain the upper hand for a while, but in the end they cannot be convinced.
In contrast, being kind and friendly, making people feel like a spring breeze, even the biggest difficulties can often be inadvertently solved.
A few days ago, when I went to the bank to run errands, an old woman probably waited for a long time and directly quarreled with people in the hall.
She shouted", "Obviously I came later than me, why can she do things first", and at the same time, she wanted to rush to the office.
The security guards on the side looked at her elderly, and it was not to stop her, nor was she to stop it, and she had no idea.
At this moment, a female manager stepped forward and brought the old woman to the side seating area with a smile on her face.
She first brought a cup of tea to the old man, and then patiently explained the work process, keeping a smile and a pleasant face the whole time, and was not affected by the excitement of the old man.
The old woman still liked to answer at first, and it didn't take long for her to obviously listen to the manager's explanation and reassurance.
After a while, the old woman's original order of work also happened to be her turn.
Under the comfort and escort of the manager, she smoothly and smoothly handled things, and waved goodbye to the manager happily before leaving.
The onlookers lamented that the manager had a good temper, and she smiled and said to everyone:
"It is said that harmony makes money, and it is also fate for everyone to come here to do things, and there is nothing that cannot be solved with a smile."
Harmony is a kind of cultivation and a kind of wisdom.
In the face of anger and impulsiveness, countering violence with violence is not a good idea, and Ezrauk is just the key.
The so-called way of harmony is to use respect, understanding and kindness to be anxious about what people are anxious about and to solve people's difficulties.
The good is like water, the spring wind turns into rain, and the moisturizer is silent, this is the power of harmony.
Some people say that life wins in harmony and loses in temper.
Peace is precious, and everything can be expected.
Cai Kangyong has a very interesting sentence: "Speaking well is the most cost-effective thing in life." ”
People often take "being able to speak eloquently" as the standard for speaking, but they do not know that the mouth is hanging in the river, which is often a low-level expression.
It is often more difficult to grasp the time point of silence than to talk endlessly.
Friend Xiao Ying just had a big fight with her husband, and when it comes to the reason, she is both sad and confused.
She and her girlfriends complained: "I obviously gave him ideas and ideas, ideas, and he not only did not appreciate it, but also said several times that I was too strong." ”
It turned out that Xiaoying's husband had not worked very well recently, and after mentioning it to her, Xiaoying, who was doing personnel work herself, immediately came to be interested and gave him a detailed analysis.
It was again looking for the cause, and it was also thinking of countermeasures, and I kept talking for more than an hour.
As a result, the husband was not grateful at all, but said impatiently, "Okay, sleep." ”
Seeing that Xiaoying was sullen and unhappy, another friend actually said to her that he had broken the truth: "Your problem is that you have said too much." ”
In the face of the other half of the work that is not going well, although the wife's expression is good, it also robs the other party of the channel of expressing unhappiness.
What the little husband needed at that time was not necessarily advice, but listening, understanding and silent support.
The more intimate the relationship, the more you must learn to exercise restraint in your expression. Expression that leaves room for expression is, on the contrary, a kind of tenderness.
I also heard an anecdote from actor Ge You.
He deals with people, always doesn't say much, and leaves the stubble to others.
Friends gather together, it is inevitable that some people will talk about their own experiences, compared to others' merciless "I have heard this earlier", Ge You always responded with another sentence:
"I really don't know about this, I have to listen to you."
Never dismantle the stage, never talk about it, but it can win the respect of others more than excessive expression.
Some people say: people's teeth are hard, the tongue is soft, and at the end of life, the teeth are gone, but the tongue will not fall, so to be soft, life can be long.
The restraint of words is precisely a kind of softness.
People tend to promote smart minds, but there is one quality that is more rare than smart, and that is kindness.
Cleverness is a gift, while kindness is a choice.
To have a good heart is to do your best to help, to help the weak in the wind and rain, and to live yourself as a light to illuminate the dark life.
Heard a story.
A female worker was accidentally locked in the cold storage of the factory, without a mobile phone, no one knew, and she was about to lose her life because of the loss of temperature.
In a trance, she heard a shout outside the door of the cold storage, and she responded with all her strength, and finally fainted.
When she woke up, she realized that she had been saved, and that it was no one else who had saved people, but the factory doorman uncle.
Someone asked the janitor why he had noticed the disappearance of the female worker.
The doorman uncle smiled and said that he had been looking at the gate for decades, and only this girl would always smile and greet him when she commuted to work from work.
Usually, when encountered, he never gave in, and would help him do what he could.
On the day the female worker was trapped, he remembered that she still greeted him in the morning, but when she left work, she didn't see anyone.
During the inspection, I happened to hear movement in the cold storage, which saved people dangerously and dangerously.
Rather than saying that the kindness and sense of responsibility of the janitor uncle saved a life, it is better to say that the encounter of two good souls truly avoided the tragedy.
Only good people will accumulate the goodwill encountered in their lives every time; only good people will know how to repay the fountain of grace.
Haruki Murakami once said:
You have to remember the people who hold umbrellas for you in the heavy rain, the people who help you block out foreign things, the people who silently hug you in the dark, the people who make you laugh, the people who cry with you, the people who say they miss you.
Having a good heart can make your life full of interlocking beauty.
The earth is round, the world is connected, the sugar you send out goes to the place where it should go, and the good you inadvertently do will eventually return to you.
What is the measure of a "cultural" person? Writer Liang Xiaosheng once gave this judgment:
Cultivation rooted in the heart; self-consciousness without reminder; freedom premised on restraint; kindness for the sake of others.
This almost coincides with the "Three Treasures of Life".
A harmonious face is cultivated; a restrained mouth is self-consciousness; a good heart is moral.
In the sea of life, we can't know our own encounters, but what we can do is to take this "three treasures" on the road.
May everyone have a kind upbringing, know how to express restraint, maintain the goodwill of the heart, and spend this life calmly.
The author | Ju Xiaoxiao
The anchor | Wen Qian, Himalayan Radio: Anchor Wen Qian
Pictures | Visual China