Author | Su Mo
Anchor | Fan Deng Reading · Anthony
Recently read a sentence, deeply touched:
The most stupid thing in the world is to keep reasoning people.
Adults should remember:
Different positions, less words are precious; different cognitions, no need to argue; the three views are not in harmony, waste of tongue.
In the first time in the ages, Zeng Guofan set himself a "three precepts" rule, that is, "refrain from talking too much, abstaining from anger, and abstaining from begging", that is, talking less, losing temper less, and having less desire, which is worth learning and alerting ourselves.
And, the precepts are at the top of the three precepts.
The wiser the person, the more he understands that different positions, it is useless to talk more; different cognition, waste of tongue; three views are not in harmony, playing the piano to the cow.
In life, we judge a thing, usually from our own point of view, which is almost everyone's inertial thinking.
As everyone knows, different positions often have different views on the same thing.
Therefore, your words and unthinking words are often unfair, and even become a hurtful arrow.
There is a saying that goes, the honey of Ru, the arsenic of the other.
Some time ago, colleague Xia was in the office, showing off that her husband was very successful with children, speaking of excitement, patting sister Zhou next to him and saying:
"Look, the child's education cannot be separated from the father, and the child brought by the father is particularly excellent!"
At that time, we saw that Sister Zhou's face changed, and we all knew that Sister Zhou was divorced and had children alone.
Although Xiao Xia was a heartless word, due to the different situations of everyone, hearing Sister Zhou's ears became a kind of irony and a kind of harm.
There are too many such things in our lives.
Complaining about the hardships of work in front of the boss, complaining about the husband in front of the mother-in-law, saying that it is too expensive in front of the rich, saying that it is too cheap in front of the poor... You never get resonance.
Because everyone's position is different, the angle of looking at the problem is naturally different, and naturally it will not have the same feelings as you, and if you say too much, it will only make people annoying.
Some time ago, I saw a particularly interesting sentence:
When driving, I hate gasse the most and the people who don't let me.
Isn't it funny, when you're plugged, you don't like it, and when you're plugging someone else, you don't want to be rejected.
In different positions, people's feelings are completely different, and everyone is used to starting from their own point of view.
Therefore, different locations, less words are expensive.
To speak less is a kind of cultivation and respect for the lives of others.
Everyone has a different position, why force it, all we can do is to be good at ourselves.
CCTV famous mouth, Bai Yansong once said:
The whole picture is unknown, no comment, it is a virtue, a kind of upbringing.
Less words is more of a kind of wisdom, and evil comes out of the mouth, and more words will be lost.
A word can make things happen, and a word can also fail.
As Zeng Guofan said, those who have been defeated by ancient fierce virtue have spoken a lot, and it is a great wisdom to keep their mouths shut in groups.
There is such a question: what is the most stupid behavior that people are most likely to commit in social interaction?
The answer of the highest praise is: the cognition is different, and it is also argued according to reason.
As the saying goes, summer insects cannot speak of ice, and well frogs cannot speak of the sea.
Each of us lives in this world, each person's experience and background are different, and the cognition of the same thing will naturally be different;
So some things, no matter how you explain, no matter how you argue, others can't understand, and in the end, they just waste their lips and tongues, and even find themselves bored.
I've seen this interesting story:
Once upon a time, there was a Xiucai and an old farmer who had an argument and almost wrestled, and later went to Yamen to let the county grandmaster judge justice.
For what?
It turned out that what they were arguing about was how much of a three-seven was there?
The peasant said, three seven twenty-eight.
Xiucai said, three seven twenty-one.
As a result, no one can say who, and no one can obey anyone. To this end, ask the county grandfather to evaluate them,
The county grand master listened, but as a result, he ordered: The old farmer went home, and Xiu Cai led the twenty big boards.
Xiucai was furious and puzzled.
The county grand master replied, "You are a talented person, but you are scheming with a white Ding, you should fight!" ”
The story is funny, but the moral is profound.
The so-called "it is better to be on the same page than to be good with fools."
For people with different cognitions, it is stupid to die, not only was it a waste of time and energy, but also a futile effort, and even caused trouble.
There is a saying in the Tao Te Ching: The good do not discern, and the debater is not good.
This means that truly intelligent people never argue with people, and those who can speak eloquently are not necessarily strong.
Cognition is different, there is no need to argue.
Indisputability is a kind of wisdom.
Because understanding cognition is different, everyone sees the world and understands differently, rather than arguing and futile lips, why bother, it is better to be relieved.
As Lincoln said, the way people who know differently can win arguments is not to argue.
Indisputability is a pattern.
In this world, it is doomed that everyone cannot be on one level, and everyone has their own way of living.
Tolerance and understanding of this phenomenon, the ultimate force is the difficulty is the self, improve their own cognition is the way of wisdom.
There is a saying that goes, there is something to say and know people, and there is food to give to the hungry.
Different positions, less words are precious; different cognitions, no disputes and no discernment; the three views are different, and the tongue is wasted.
Speaking less is a kind of cultivation, a kind of wisdom, and never stand in your own position to evaluate others.
Not arguing is a kind of transparency, a pattern, never argue with people at different levels.
Amplify your own pattern, do not evaluate others easily, and do not try to always convince others.
While holding on to yourself, learn to respect others.
The most comfortable state of life is: with like-minded people, talk all night long, do not speculate, laugh.
Click "Watching", I only wish you and me, all the encounters are warm, the gains are expected, and the rest of your life is calm and fun.
Typography | Zheng to the north
Music | Fallen leaves know autumn