There is a saying in the Analects of Government: "Thirty stands, forty is not confused, and fifty knows the destiny of heaven." ”
Knowing the mandate of heaven is not to resign oneself to fate and do nothing, but to plot things in people and accomplish things in heaven.
Before the age of fifty, it is to go all out in the hope of achieving something; after the age of fifty, it is still a continuous cultivation, but it has been despised for the final personal honor and disgrace.
Entrepreneur Feng Lun once said a classic saying: "The real greatness of a person is not to lead others, but to manage himself." ”
Managing oneself is a lifelong career, especially for fifty-year-olds, the year of destiny is precisely the transition point of life.
The following 10 taboos help middle-aged people around the age of fifty to sort out themselves and rectify their lives.
01, avoid rigid thinking
"Ask where the canal is as clear as water, so that there is a source of living water."
Although the study of life is difficult to exhaust, but an inch of joy is an inch of joy.
Keep your head updated so that a talent is not rigid and decaying, especially for fifty-year-olds.
See a trending video today:
In the video, a middle-aged man of about 50 years old, wearing a security suit, sits next to a piano, his fingers skillfully playing the piano, and the beautiful piano music comes out of the audio.
It turned out that the man was a security guard at Lanzhou University's School of Arts, and because his daily work was influenced by students, he began to learn piano and calligraphy.
Looking at the video, he skillfully plays the piano, writes with a brush seriously, and his face is full of calm, as if he sees a serious learner.
At the age of fifty, you can reopen the door of curiosity and re-enter the temple of learning.
The color of life is up to you, and fifty-year-olds can start all over again.
02, avoid relying on the old and selling the old
When people reach fifty, most of them have rich experience and successful careers, but they must not rely on their own experience, rely on the old and sell the old, and despise others.
The Three Character Classic has a saying: "Xi Zhongni, Shi Xiangqi, ancient sage, Shang Qinxue." "It tells the story of Confucius worshipping a seven-year-old prodigy, Xiàng tuó, as his teacher.
Xiang Qiao has been diligent and inquisitive since childhood, and is known as a child prodigy.
In order to get a glimpse of Xiang Qi's style, Confucius came to see him.
When he saw Xiang Qi, Confucius saw that he was arguing with another child whether the sun was close to us in the morning or close to us at noon, and the two of them were red in the face, and they were on a par;
When he saw Confucius coming, he asked him for advice, but he didn't expect that Confucius couldn't say why.
Confucius saw that Xiang Qi did not seek much understanding, and his heart was very admired, so he bent down and said to Xiang Qi: "The future life is terrible, I should worship you as a teacher." ”
A generation of sages did not rely on their own achievements, did not despise others, but humbly asked for advice, especially as ordinary people.
Only by being humble can we make sustainable progress; only by maintaining a humble posture can life continue to improve.
03, avoid being angry
Life in the world is like being in the midst of thorns, the heart is not moving, people do not move, and if they do not move, they are not hurt;
If the heart moves, the person moves, hurts his body and his bones, and then experiences all the pain in the world.
People who are easily moved by outsiders are prone to make some wrong decisions and finally let themselves be in deep pain.
Aunt Wang in the unit is about to retire in a few years, and her usual work is very idle.
But lately seeing her is always a look of sadness, people seem to have been sucked out of their souls.
Later, I learned that Aunt Wang took her pension money of 300,000 yuan and an unfamiliar friend to invest, and finally lost all of it, which can be said to be nothing.
At first, Aunt Wang, at the instigation of this friend, felt that the money was idle and idle, so she made this rash decision.
After the use of the spirit, what you are left with is a shot like a shot put ball, and if it is serious, it will affect the body.
No matter what age, calmness and wisdom are always the root of success; the use of anger is the "accelerator" of failure.
04, do not overwork your children and grandchildren
"Children and grandchildren have their own children and grandchildren, and they should not be cattle and horses for their children." This saying comes from the "Augmentation of the Sages and the First Collection".
There is also a story behind it:
Legend has it that in ancient times, there was a Xiucai who took many meritorious titles, all of whom were named Sun Shan, and he was discouraged and went away to become a teacher.
Later, when his wife became pregnant and gave birth to a son, Xiucai put all his expectations on his son.
When his son was not yet literate, Xiucai insisted on pairing with his son, and the son naturally could not answer, and Xiucai chose to become a monk in a huff.
It was also later that the wife finally understood that Xianggong had left the family because her son had not met his requirements, and felt that the desire for the title of the gold list would be shattered again.
Since then, the wife has devoted herself to teaching her children to read and write, and has also hired Mr. Teacher.
After years of hard study, Xiucai's son passed the exam in one fell swoop.
After hearing this news, Xiu rushed back to his hometown from the temple, but unexpectedly he had not returned for many years, and the people who guarded the door did not know him for a long time.
In the process of negotiating with the janitor, Xiucai saw the son of the high school leader through the crack in the door.
Because he still could not enter the mansion, Xiucai could only ask for a message in ink.
"In the eighteen autumns of leaving my hometown, I will not collect a thousand dollars and buckets of rice; my children and grandchildren have their own children and grandchildren's blessings, and they should not make horses and cattle for their children and grandchildren." Since then, this classic verse has been left behind.
Use this to advise all parents that when their children and grandchildren grow up, appropriate guidance can naturally be available, but do not worry too much, otherwise it will cause them trouble.
05, avoid excessive frugality
Parents are accustomed to working hard only for the family, not willing to spend money for themselves, and accustomed to "poor self-support".
There is a saying in the Zizhi Tongjian: "If there is a degree of taking and using it with moderation, it is always enough." ”
Life must be temperate, but it must also be measured; if the inner needs are not met, the sense of happiness will also decrease.
When people reach fifty, they do not have to be excessively frugal, but they must learn to "enrich" themselves.
As the saying goes, "Where your money is spent, the harvest is there." ”
Eat fresh fruits and vegetables every day, the harvest is safe and healthy; spend money to shop and travel, harvest is happy and beautiful.
When people reach fifty, it is time to properly treat themselves, life is not only to create happiness for the family, but also to be comfortable and happy.
Occasionally let yourself enjoy it, but you will be happy physically and mentally.
06, avoid indulging in the achievements of youth
There is a sentence in the Spring and Autumn Festival's "Fengge": "Those who go to the past cannot be advised, but those who come can still be pursued." ”
It means that the past achievements have passed, and those that are coming can be remedied.
The achievements gained when they are young have become history, and when people reach middle age, more brilliant achievements should belong to the future.
Actor Tao Hong belongs to the powerful faction in the performance industry, and once won the Magnolia Award for Best Supporting Actress with the role of Song Qian in the TV series "Little Joy".
In fact, twenty years ago, Xiao Tao Hong was already red.
In her junior year, she participated in the filming of "Black Eyes", through which Tao Hong won many awards such as Best Actress, Huabiao Award, Golden Rooster Award and Best Actress at the Damascus International Film Festival in Syria.
Standing at the node of middle age, looking back at the previous achievements, it was found that Tao Hong did not live in the past achievements, but kept a low profile in the following decades and spoke with acting skills.
Because of this, it has a more brilliant performance now.
People are constantly growing and progressing, and the same is true after the age of fifty; not indulging in the glory of the past can meet a new tomorrow.
7. Avoid neglecting physical health
In the Yellow Emperor's Inner Classic, it is said: "Eat and drink moderately, live and live regularly, and do not work in vain." ”
The body is the capital of the revolution, a reasonable diet, adequate sleep, not too tired, in order to be physically and mentally healthy, away from disease.
After the age of fifty, the body looks quite healthy, but in fact, the body function has entered a state of calm.
What was easily done when you were young will feel overwhelmed to do it now.
As the saying goes: "The golden year does not come again, and it is difficult to get another morning." ”
The red light that occasionally lights up in the body should be put on the heart, because this time is different from the past;
Timely attention to physical discomfort is likely to avoid greater pain.
Fifty years old, don't joke about health, without health, all happiness and achievement are empty talk.
8. Do not neglect those who accompany you for the rest of your life
When people reach fifty, they must know how to cherish.
People who have spent most of their lives with their own ups and downs are the people who know themselves best; the more bland the feelings, the more people feel at ease.
Luo Zhenyu, the founder of the "get" mobile app, mentioned a story of his own in a speech:
Once, he was very resistant to marriage, and even wanted not to get married for the rest of his life, until he later met an old man at the beach, which gave Luo Zhenyu a new understanding of marriage.
The old man recounted his views on marriage.
The two married not to covet each other's money, but to find someone who understood themselves in a dull life to spend the rest of their lives.
If you are sick and want to drink water in the middle of the night, as long as you poke the companion next to you, even if you don't speak, the other party will understand.
This kind of "understanding" is cultivated in decades of feelings, there is no daily mutual payment, where is the key moment of protection and care?
After half a life, the person who understands himself has been there, and it is the happiest thing for the rest of his life.
People should not forget in middle age, cherish the original person, and guard the most true love.
9. Avoid unnecessary comparisons
There is a saying that goes: "Half of the tiredness of life comes from survival, and half from comparison." ”
When he was young, he had nothing to compare with others; but when he reached fifty, his material wealth accumulated slightly, and his children began to accumulate their own achievements, but instead there was a tendency to compare.
In the "Marriage Nest" TV series, there are two mothers-in-law who compete with each other, and they compare not anything else, but their daughter-in-law who has just entered the door.
One said that his daughter-in-law had just returned from her honeymoon and bought herself an inconspicuous silk scarf, which was thousands of dollars;
After the other listened, the whole face showed a disdainful look, and then said that his daughter-in-law was a high-achieving student at a certain university, who usually liked to write novels, would become a writer in the future, and now worked at a well-known advertising agency.
The whole picture is an air of comparison that cannot be hidden.
In fact, comparing a daughter-in-law is only to satisfy your own vanity, and it will not bring the slightest improvement to the current life.
When people reach middle age and keep their true lives, they will usher in peaceful happiness.
10. Don't care too much about age
Many people are limited by the number "fifty", bound by age, even if life is boring and boring, they dare not try new ones.
Remember Mr. Wang Deshun, who had silver hair but walked onto the catwalk?
When his peers were all at home entertaining their grandchildren and enjoying their old age, Wang Deshun chose to shine on the international stage.
At the age of 49, Wang Deshun became a member of the North Drifter and came to Beijing, he began to study mime, because pantomime belongs to the physical performance, so 50-year-old Wang Deshun re-entered the gym.
At the age of 57, he created "living sculpture", and in order to be able to perform "living sculpture", Wang Deshun began to train his muscles again.
In the next two years, Wang Deshun successively learned to ride a horse, ride a motorcycle, and even became a DJ.
In the eyes of outsiders, Wang Deshun has always burst with a spirit of pursuit, daring to try and break through at the age of more than 50 years;
In his opinion, he just did not pay attention to his age, even if he was over 50, he could live another taste.
Putting aside the age limit and following your heart, you will find that you have not tapped the shining point and live a new life.
Mu Xin said, "I didn't know the taste of being human since I was fifty years old. ”
Fifty years old, life comes to the middle of the way, and the return of life begins to emerge slowly;
Although life is halfway through, it can also open a new curtain on another world.
The above ten taboos can be used as a careful way to embrace a benign life, read carefully, and if there is no change, it will be encouraged, and I believe that there will be some gains.
When people reach middle age, they embrace change, hold on to the most authentic days, and live the rest of their lives happily and fully.