The higher the level, the more full and powerful the heart will be, and the vision will be placed in a more long-term place.
Author: Usopp (Rich Book Author)
Mention of the famous American psychologist and interpersonal relationshipist Dale Carnegie.
Most people are not too unfamiliar, and his book "The Weakness of Human Nature" is even more well-known.
This book can always use some examples close to our lives to illustrate some methods and conclusions of interacting with people, and the practicality is very powerful.
Whether it is to be a person or to deal with things, we are afraid of being a person with a low level and a small pattern, but some behaviors and details will expose some of our shortcomings.
To know how to do it, then this book is definitely worth reading, and to make ourselves better, we must get rid of three low-level performances in life.
The lower the level of people, the more face-loving
As the old saying goes, "A man fights for a breath, and a Buddha fights for an incense."
Throughout the ages, one of the most favorite issues for our people to talk about is face. But at the national level, face is dignity, glory, not vanity, and even less arrogance.
But in life, people who love face often distort the meaning of face, believing that face is where people's pride lies, where face lies, everything can be lost, and face cannot be lost.
In the end, it is related to the personal level. The higher the level, the less they care about these nothingness; on the other hand, the lower the level of people, the more they love face, and feel that they cannot lose anything.
Earlier I heard a colleague talk about such a thing.
A girl is ready to marry her boyfriend, but her parents say that she must have a high bride price and a luxurious wedding banquet. The girl asked her parents if everything could be done from Jane, and now they were young and didn't have that much money.
As a result, he was reprimanded by his mother: "No, even if the bride price is small, the wedding will not be done beautifully, it will be laughed at by others, that is more faceless." ”
So she borrowed a lot of money with her boyfriend and friends around her, gave enough bride price, and also held a wedding banquet of no small scale, the wedding was grand, but she owed a lot of foreign debt.
Later, when I got married, I didn't dare to have children, because I had been making money to pay off debts, saying that I was afraid that I would not be able to afford to have children.
Is face really that important?
Thinking about this, I also thought of a few years ago, Li Xiaowen, an academician of the Chinese Academy of Sciences, became popular on the Internet in a speech, only because in that speech, Academician Li Xiaowen wore a pair of "one foot pedal" cloth shoes on his feet, looking like a rural old man.
If his identity had not been noted in that speech, I am afraid that no one would have thought that this plainly dressed old man would be a leading expert in the field of remote sensing in China.
Coincidentally.
Grandpa Yuan Longping, who has been away from us for several months, is also an old man with a "bad face". Buy 35 yuan of simple clothes in the mall, use a dozen pieces of tie, but feed hundreds of millions of people.
What is face? In the eyes of these predecessors, decency is enough, and exaggerated face projects are not necessary. Face does not need to be built by material things, but from words and deeds and the confidence emanating from the heart.
Life depends on being down-to-earth and down-to-earth, and face is not accumulated by materials, but by the fullness of one's own heart.
Presumably everyone remembers the "campus loan" incident, right? Those students who exchange nude photos for money, those who start to spend ahead in various software, don't they fall into the trap of money because of vanity and good face?
The lower the level of the person, the lower the vision
There is a very hot discussion on Weibo, which is about the impact of academic qualifications on life.
In the hot review, I saw the state of the world, and at the same time saw a Zhengzheng fact, that is, if you do not eat the suffering of reading, you will eat the suffering from society.
An HR who works at Apple said that she needs hundreds of resumes from viewers every day, but she will not be picky about the profession, or even fit the position, but the minimum threshold for the school is Fudan.
Another person in charge said that in their public institutions, the same position, the salary of graduate students and doctors must be higher than that of undergraduates, not to mention specialist students, and they will not be admitted at all.
Many people think that the schools of 985 and 211 are enough, but in the top investment banks in the north, Shanghai, Guangzhou, and Shenzhen, the so-called "financial migrant workers" come from the financial management of the resumption of diplomatic relations in the north of the Qing Dynasty.
What is more poignant is the summary of a netizen - in fact, at the beginning, some people said that "academic qualifications are not important", just want to light a lamp of hope for the lives of people with low academic qualifications, but now they did not expect to evolve into an excuse, that is, "what is wrong with my low academic qualifications".
Some people in their thirties still resolutely embark on the road to study, some people become presidents at the age of sixty, and some people start to learn to paint at the age of ninety and eventually become painters.
There is a very hot sentence on the Internet:
"They all say that academic qualifications don't matter, but the poor thing is that you are convinced."
The lower the level of people, the lower the vision, because they can only see what is within their own vision, and they cannot jump out to see the wider world.
It is said in The Weakness of Human Nature: "For those who are immature, they can always find excuses to disguise some of their own shortcomings or misfortunes." ”
For us ordinary people, if you want to avoid becoming a person with low vision, you may wish to start from the following three points, and after trying for a period of time, you will find that your state has changed:
1. Keep reading. Reading can change a person's thinking, so that we can use the author's perspective to think in different ways, so as to jump out of their own perspective and enrich personal thinking ability.
2, strive to do a thing to the best. Even if you are doing an ordinary job now, you must strive to be the best in your position, this is the best, even if it is not for the company, for the leadership, but also for yourself.
3. Do not criticize others at will. Vision determines the pattern, and people with patterns will not easily criticize others. Focus on ourselves and strive to be the best version of ourselves, and as for others, we just need to focus on being ourselves, and it's already great.
The lower the level of people, the more they can't put it down
People live a lifetime, and they are most afraid that they will not be able to put down anything.
But as the book "The Weakness of Human Nature" says, when you have nothing to disappoint, that's when you start to get it.
It was literally a word, but Xiang Yu, the King of Western Chu, did not understand.
In that year, Xiang Yu was preparing to cross the Wujiang River (present-day Anhui) in the east, and the pavilion chief of the Wujiang River said to Xiang Yu: "Although Jiangdong is small, it has a radius of thousands of miles, and the people are hundreds of thousands, which is enough to be king." Now only the vassals have boats, may the king cross the river as soon as possible, if the Han army pursues, it will not be able to escape. ”
But after Xiang Yu listened, he chose to die on the battlefield instead of crossing the river.
At that moment, the shame and guilt of the defeat surged into his heart, if he chose to let go and start over, and later the pace of Liu Bang, the King of Han, to unify the world, perhaps it would not be so dashing.
I very much wanted to tell Xiang Yu at that time, "Stay in the green mountains, not afraid of no firewood", we have been passing on the old saying in China for so long can withstand any test.
In our lives, many people are "Xiang Yu".
Obviously, you can choose a new start, but you always have to dwell on the mood of the past. Often at this time, people are already bound and cannot perform anything.
Recently, the top female star Yang Mi was called "sober in the world", in an interview, she was asked if she would look back?
Yang Mi calmly replied that what happened before, what happened yesterday, no matter how good or bad it is, it has nothing to do with me, it was yesterday' thing.
Indeed, if you are endlessly entangled in the past, you will be shackled.
Yang Mi can grow the red entertainment circle for ten years, and is still the top of the line, new people in and out, but she still stands. This experience of not looking at the past but only looking at the future is worth learning from us.
People who can reach the top must have something that we don't have for the time being. Exploring these qualities that make people better and stronger is what we can do to get rid of the low level.
Whenever I feel stuck with work and life, I am willing to pick up "The Weakness of Human Nature" and savor it, and I can think of many real examples in life.
This book has been praised by the Western media as "the first book of world success studies", and it has also been evaluated by all walks of life as "the world's most classic and practical reference book for people to live in the world".
I think that when Carnegie wrote this book, he must not have thought that the experience he shared would be infinitely used by the world. This year, the book is 85 years old and still shines.
Encourage everyone together
About the author: Usopp (rich book author), and 5 million people to upgrade the cognition of life, this article source: Franklin Book Club, the copyright of this article belongs to the rich book, unauthorized, may not be reproduced, infringement will be investigated
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