Text | Du Ruoyin, the original debut, welcome to forward and share
There is a difference between love in marriage and before marriage, because after marriage love is mixed with too many trifles, there are too many people and things involved. Over time, it will dilute the few passions left in love. Once you lose the intensity of love, life will slowly return to flatness. There is no strong love and honey in the beginning, and there are only large and small quarrels and contradictions in the marriage.
Xiaohua has always been a man with a strong sense of enterprise, especially after marriage, he worked harder and tried to climb up. He told his wife that he was desperately trying to give her a better life, so that she could afford to buy her favorite designer bags and jewelry.
At first, his wife was very supportive of him and felt that he was a motivated, responsible man, and he would devote more and more time and energy to his work.
Xiaohua became more and more busy, at first taking a little time to spend a little time with his wife in the world of two, and then it developed to come home later and later, and saturdays and Sundays were too busy to see anyone. For Xiaohua, a good marriage quality needs good material conditions to support, and with good conditions, the marriage will be more stable.
The wife takes maternity leave alone from pregnancy to before giving birth. Seeing that everyone else was a couple, her heart was very unhappy. But she comforted herself: "He is creating a good life for us, he is also very hard, I want to be more considerate of him." It may be better to comfort yourself in this way, and all the grievances are swallowed into the stomach alone, choosing the way to make yourself better.
After the birth of the child, the wife has no private space of her own, no work and social networking. The circle of life suddenly became smaller, and one person was busy taking care of the children.
When long-term fatigue and lack of sleep lead to discomfort, I hope that my husband can take some time to help take care of the children, and he can take a break and breathe. But Xiaohua's reason is the same every time, either on a business trip or an important meeting to be held. In a word: "I'm busy and can't leave." ”
Xiaohua has always believed that the rest of his life is very long, and when his career is more stable and can rise to a height, he will have a little more time to make up for his neglect and concern for his wife.
However, what he didn't know was that the work could not be done, especially for a small Hua with such a strong sense of enterprise, he would not waste a little time.
In places he didn't know or see, his wife was always alone to care for sick children. Always sit alone at the table to eat. Being ignored and snubbed for a long time slowly made her despair about this marriage and this person.
How many people are busy with their careers and neglect to manage their marriages. They think that getting married means that the relationship is stable, and there is no need to bother to care about everything about each other.
In fact, many marriages are dead under such a lack of love, and many women have gradually become desperate and began to die.
We always feel that the rest of our lives are very long, love will not change, until later we find that life is like a dream.
With the passage of time, Xiaohua also unconsciously entered middle age.
Due to long hours of high-intensity work, irregular diet and rest, Xiaohua was tired. After a few days in the hospital, the doctor recommends letting go of work and recuperating at home for a while, otherwise the condition will worsen.
He decided to follow the hospital's advice and took a long vacation to recuperate at home.
However, to his disappointment, his wife did not show nervousness and worry. As usual, she goes to yoga practice after work, and has afternoon tea with her friends on weekends to chat about the latest situation.
Xiao Hua couldn't stand that his wife didn't pay so much attention to herself, and one night at the dinner table, the fire that had accumulated in her stomach finally broke out. Accusing his wife, he said, "If I'm sick, you can't take care of me at home, and when you have time, you can go out and practice yoga and drink what afternoon tea." ”
The wife's answer was very calm, she said: "I am at home alone, waiting for you for more than ten years, and your time with me is countless." I now have my own circle of life, found something I like to do, and I have my own life goals. You just remembered now that you wanted me to take care of you at home, and over the past ten years, have you ever thought about how I got here? ”
Xiaohua did not understand until this moment that he had worked hard to develop his career for so many years, but in fact his free time was spent on various social and social activities. Even in order to please the boss to take the initiative to show kindness to the female boss, often send her home, accompany her everywhere on business trips, the relationship has long exceeded the relationship between the boss and the subordinates.
This point has long been detected by his wife, becoming a thorn in her heart that can no longer be removed, and every time she thinks about it, she will be heartbroken.
She thought that time could forget everything, but every disappointment reminded her of his betrayal.
Although he changed jobs and did not have any contact with the other party, the estrangement was there, and the betrayal was a fact, not something that could be forgiven by saying a word of forgiveness. When you are young, you wantonly squander each other's love, and in middle age, you find that many things have changed, and the originally happy marriage has become a mutual will.
In middle age, I realized how cold my wife's heart was for marriage
Xiaohua and his wife quarreled more and more fiercely, and he thought that he had changed his past mistakes and did not pick flowers and weeds outside, which was the best reward and responsibility for this marriage.
The wife said that she was middle-aged, it didn't matter if she divorced or not, the child was already so old.
Since the two people vented all kinds of dissatisfaction in their hearts, it seemed that they would never return to their original appearance. The wife no longer revolves around the house all day, and she begins to have things she likes to do, practicing yoga and learning flower arrangement.
No matter how Xiaohua makes up for it, she can't cover the heart of her wife who is dead to marriage.
In middle age, I understand how hard my wife's heart is for marriage
At this moment, he found that this home was not as warm as when it was first established, and no one poured hot tea and prepared meals for himself as soon as he arrived at home.
The wife's attitude has shown that she is desperate for this marriage, and it is difficult to get it back. He regretted the neglect, snub and betrayal of the other party over the years.
Why is it that in middle age, I understand how cold my heart is for a wife who is desperate for marriage? Because the cruelty of the wife and the despair of marriage are not overnight but accumulated over time. Seeing his wife's cruel heart, seeing that the two people are becoming more and more like strangers, loneliness and regret fill Xiaohua's heart, and often ask himself why he snubbed her so much.
Conclusion:
Life seems to be very long, but in fact it is very short, and the years are not waiting for anyone. It is good for men to be busy with their careers, but they cannot neglect to accompany and care for their families.
Don't always think, "My wife and I have a lifetime, and then we are not busy or retired, and we have a lot of time to spend with her", and by then, they may have become accustomed to days without you.
The so-called "long-term coming to Japan" is just to convince herself, how many years does a woman have to wait? Once a woman is desperate for marriage and has a dead heart, her heart will become colder and harder.
The most intolerable thing in marriage is betrayal, no matter how long it has been, it is a barrier that women cannot pass in their hearts. When people reach middle age, they despair of marriage, even if they do not choose divorce, the sadness in her heart, the hatred and resentment in her heart are difficult to eliminate.
Even the best love needs to be well maintained, and even a happy marriage must be managed with heart. No one will always be waiting for you, and not all losses can be recovered.
"It's not easy to fall in love, but do it and cherish it."
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You think women are desperate for marriage, what to do?
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