Du Fu said in the seventh part of "Relief from Boredom" that "the new poem is changed from the long chant". Even great poets such as Du Fu, Ouyang Xiu, and Jia Dao would often revise their poems after they wrote them. Therefore, we modern people write poetry, and we do not have to force it to be achieved overnight.
Mr. Zhou Zhenfu specially told several stories of changing poems in the revised part of "Examples of Poetry".
The first story quotes Hu Zai's "Tales of the Hidden Fishing of The Dragon Creek", Volume VIII:
"Man Shuo Poetry" Cloud: "Peach blossoms fall by yang flowers, and yellow birds fly at the same time as white birds." Li Shang Laoyun: "I tasted Xu Shichuan and said that there was old Du ink in the family of a scholar, and his first cloud, 'Peach Blossom Wants to Share Yang Hua Language', thought that he changed three words in light ink, but he knew that the ancient characters were not tired of changing it. Otherwise, why is there a language of day and month? (Hu Zai's "Yu Yin Cong Dialect of Cangxi", vol. 8)
This poem is Du Fu's famous work "Qu Jiang to Wine":
"The head of the river outside the garden can't sit back, and the crystal palace turns slightly." Peach blossoms fall thinly, yellow birds fly at the same time as white birds. Indulging in drinking for a long time and judging people to abandon each other, laziness is really contrary to the world. The official felt more distant from cangzhou, and the boss was sad and did not brush his clothes.
In the "Examples of Poems", it is said that Du Fu's original poem used an anthropomorphic technique: 'Peach blossoms want to share Yang Hua language', but later changed to a direct description: peach blossoms chase Yang flowers fall.
In general, poets like to give the scenery a personality spirit, which is more vivid. But why does Du Fu go against the grain in this poem? Mr. Zhou Zhenfu explains:
Du Fu sat in The Scenic Area of Chang'an, Qujiang, facing the wine, thinking that he had been abandoned by others, could not get along with the ruling faction, had nothing to do in Chang'an, and was lazy and bored. Therefore, I always sat at the head of the river and did not want to go back, and sat for a long time, so I noticed that "the peach blossoms are fine and the yang flowers fall, and the yellow birds fly at the same time." Writing like this is lining up his idle and boring mood. If you do "peach blossom desire to share Yanghua language" and use the anthropomorphic method, it is not compatible with the lazy and boring mood at that time.
However, I personally think that this kind of writing does not only mean the poet's "idle boredom", but the falling flowers in the eyes correspond to the loss and abandonment in the poet's heart. If it is the peach blossom that actively wants to speak to Yang Hua, it lacks the characteristics of withering, which seems to be somewhat contradictory to "lazy dynasty and the truth".
The key is not whether it is personified or depicted, but "falling".
"Donggao Miscellaneous Records" Yun: "Lu Zhi's "Mocking Xiaode" has 'learning language spring warblers, and the book window autumn geese oblique'. Later, it was changed to: 'Learn the language of the spring bird, paint the window line twilight crow. 'I know that the poetry is not tired of changing also. (Hu Zai's "Yu Yin Cong Of Words of The Fishing in The River", vol. 31)
Huang Tingjian's "Mocking Xiaode" is a five-word poem, which was changed after the jaw connection: learning the language of spring birds, painting windows and walking crows.
Middle-aged son, long old career. Learn to whisper spring birds, paint the window line twilight crow. Wanting to hate the Queen Mother, a little wise female brother boasted. To interpret the theory of the diver, it is better to have no foreign home.
Mr. Zhou analyzed that there was no problem in learning the language of spring warblers. But scribbling on the window, it is unlikely that it will be as neat as an autumn goose flying obliquely. Autumn goose oblique, like to rhyme is not real, so it was changed to graffiti.
Because it is a rhythmic sentence, considering the problem of flatness and rhyme, the second sentence is changed to: Paint the window line twilight crow. The lower link has been changed, and the upper link must of course be changed: learning the language of the spring bird.
The story of Zheng Gu's one-character master is almost a household name:
Qi Ji's "Morning Plum" poem: "In the deep snow of the former village, several branches bloomed last night." Zheng Gu said: "A few branches, not early, not as 'one branch'." (Song Changbai's "Poetry of Liuting", vol. 3)
However, Mr. Zhou Zhenfu believes that there is no need to change Qi Ji's original poem:
Changing "several branches" to "one branch opening" to accommodate the word "early" shows traces of contrivance. In fact, when a flower on a tree blooms overnight, it will not only have one branch, but it will be one branch, but it will not be real. Besides, the real description should not be changed to be untrue in order to accommodate the topic. So these two verses do not have to be changed.
What do you think? Do you prefer one plum or several plums?
Jia Dao's deliberation is also well known:
Jia Dao first went to the Beijing Division, and one day on the donkey got a sentence cloud: "The bird stays in the middle of the pond tree, and the monk knocks on the door under the moon." He also wanted to make the word "push", and the refinement was undecided. Groaning on the donkey, leading the hand to make a gesture of scrutiny, the viewer was surprised. When Han retreated to the throne, Jing Zhaoyin, the car rode out. The island did not feel that it was still a gesture to the third verse. The Russians rushed to Yin Qian, and the island had undecided the words "push" and "knock" in the verses they received, and they did not know how to avoid it. Retreating for a long time, it is said that the island is known: "Typing is good." "So they returned together, discussed the poetry together, and stayed for many days, because they were friends with the island." (Ruan Read "Poetry Total Turtle", vol. 11)
Regarding pushing and knocking, Mr. Zhou considers two aspects, the first rhythm:
Syllables, the typing is also louder.
Second, from the perspective of deliberate characters:
As far as this poem is concerned, it should be Li Ning's door that should be knocked on, and this monk may be the author's own reference, because the author is a monk, and the name of the law has no origin. Then he went to find Li Ning at night, and he should knock on the door before he corresponded to the seclusion. Syllables, the typing is also louder.
The title of this poem is "Title Li Ning's Seclusion":
Idle and few neighbors, grass path into the desert garden. Birds stay in the trees by the pond, and monks knock on the door under the moon. Crossing the bridge is divided into wild colors, moving stones and moving cloud roots. For the time being, I still come here, and the quiet period is not worthy.
Jia Dao went to a friend's house and couldn't push the door in like he did when he came home, so he had to knock.
However, when Han Yu heard these two poems, he did not necessarily know the title, why did he think it was good to knock?
Wang Anshi seems to like to change poetry for others:
"The Bimen Golden Gate leans on the sky to open, and the flowers of the Five Seeing Palace fall on the ancient locust." Tomorrow the flat boat will go to the sea, but it will look at Penglai with clouds. This Liu Gong father poem was also composed from the museum when he came out of Cao Prefecture. The old cloud was "in the clouds", and Jinggong was changed to "cloud qi". ("Poet Jade Crumbs", volume VI "changing a word" quoted in "Wang Zhifang's Poetry")
Regarding the change of the word of this poem, the "Examples of Poems" explains:
Since Liu Xuan had degraded officials from the imperial court to the localities, it was difficult to say that he was in the clouds in the localities, so Wang Anshi wanted to change it to "Cloud Qi". Changing it to "cloud qi" is to regard wangyun qi as a lookout penglai, probably because the mirage is also a cloud, and there is a loutai city que in the mirage.
Yunli, originally a place language, was changed to an object by Wang Anshi.
Wang Anshi changed the poem for Wang Qinchen:
Invert the word is jian. Wang Zhongzhi went to the summoning examination hall, tried it, and made a definite question: "Gumu Sensen White Jade Hall, this test article for many years." The sun obliquely played Yang Fu, idly brushing the dust to see the painting wall. Jing Gong saw it, and sighed very much, and changed it to "Playing The Long Yang Strike", and Yun: Poet Language, so Nai Jian. "Poet Jade Crumbs"
Regarding this story, Mr. Zhou Zhenfu mentioned in "Poetry Examples: Poets' Language":
Volume VI of "Poet Jade Crumbs" mentions Wang Anshi's "poet's language", that is, the language of poetry is sometimes different from prose.
However, why "so healthy" is not explained. Some people think that the strike is louder, and the grammatical structure changes have a unique charm of the verse.
Wang Anshi changed his own poem, the most famous of which is this one:
Wang Jinggong said in a sentence: "Jingkou Guazhou is a water (1), and Zhongshan is only separated by a few heavy mountains. Spring breeze and the south bank of the Green River, when will the bright moon shine on me? "Sergeant Wu hid his grass, and the first cloud "went to the south bank of the river again", circled the word "to", noted "not good", changed to "pass"; changed to "into" and changed to "full"; and everything that was like a ten-word word was originally set as "green". (Hong Mai's "Rong Zhai Continued Pen", vol. VIII)
Changing to green, Mr. Zhou believes has two benefits:
First, "green again", more colorful than other words. Reading "green again" evokes a piece of Jiangnan spring color in front of us. The other words are more abstract and have no such effect. Second, use "green again" to evoke our associations.
Modification is a link in the process of poetry creation, not an act after the creation of the poem. Of course, there are also poems that were revised long after they were written.
Now many people pursue exports into chapters, and their mouths are absolutely dominant. In fact, the ancients did not necessarily make every capital with a stroke of a pen, and they also needed to go through thousands of hammers.
However, some people believe that the more the poem is changed, the worse it is, and it is better not to change it. See you.
@Old Street Taste
Qin Shi Mingyue Han Shi Guan, Smoke Cage Cold Water Moon Cage Sand, intertextuality and interspersure in poetry