Today to tell you a story of an unfilial son who has been denounced by the whole network, this is a heartbreaking story, and the final ending is a big reversal, and even makes people clap their hands. At the end I'll also post some of my superficial opinions, and you'll see if there's some truth to that.
Today's story is a bit long, but I hope you can read it and seriously think about what we do as parents or children.
Filial piety comes first, a belief that is deeply rooted in the bones of every Chinese. It is well known that human beings are social animals, and the kinship of blood has always existed in human civilization and played an important role in the development of human history.
Since ancient times, there has been a debate about filial piety or not, that is, when parents are wrong, should they obey and be foolish?
In the Book of Filial Piety, Zengzi also asked Confucius, and Confucius replied: "Therefore, when it is unjust, the son cannot not argue with the father", which means that if the parents have unrighteousness, the children should raise it to advise them, and should not obey it in a vague way.
Recently, this issue has been hotly debated on the Internet, and various views seem to be very reasonable, and they all attack from the moral high ground.
The reason is that recently someone pulled out the story of Dr. Wang Yongqiang, who disappeared for 20 years after going abroad and did not return to China to visit his elderly parents, he was criticized by the whole network for filial piety, but because of the truth, he was sympathized by the whole network. Today, we will talk about it. The story of Wang Yongqiang, a postdoctoral fellow at Peking University known as the Unfilial Son, Wang Yongqiang was born in a poor family in Changzhou, Jiangsu Province, his parents were authentic farmers, his mother was an honest housewife, and his father was a man who achieved nothing and was lazy and did not take responsibility. Wang Yongqiang's brother also suffers from polio. Wang Yongqiang, he was the youngest, and his mother told Wang Yongqiang since he was a child that if you are out of the way in the future, you must support your brother. Wang Yongqiang also did his best to take care of his brother at that time, and Wang Yongqiang at that time also knew that if he wanted to change this poverty situation, reading was the only way out.
When the young Wang Yongqiang dealt with chai rice oil and salt every day, when the children of the same age got together after school, Wang Yongqiang often fed the pigs and sheep alone. But although he grew up in such an environment, Wang Yongqiang did not give up on himself, he had a big hobby, that is, reading.
His family did not bring him warmth, but a burden, and he carried on his shoulders responsibilities that did not belong to his age. Only books were like a ray of sunshine in the cold that gave him hope. He also worked very hard and his grades were among the best in the class. But after his parents thought about it, they felt that reading was useless, and even advised him to drop out of school and work early to support his family, while Wang Yongqiang, who knew the importance of reading, was not obedient, he went out to pick up garbage, do child labor, dig yam in order to save tuition, rely on the meager income obtained by these odd jobs, Wang Yongqiang insisted on his studies.
"Heaven will descend on the Si people, they must first suffer their hearts, work their bones, starve their bodies, and lack their bodies", this may be the heavenly way, Wang Yongqiang was finally admitted to Soochow University with excellent results. But it was at this time that her relationship with her parents began to break down, and the nightmare was about to begin, Wang Yongqiang, because of his excellent academic performance in school, coupled with the poverty of the family, he applied for and received the school's scholarships and grants, but when her parents learned of this, they asked him to send all the money except tuition fees home, and even the four yuan living allowance issued by the school had to be sent back.
At that time, Wang Yongqiang did not disobey his parents' orders, he sent the money back to his home according to his parents' requirements, he worked hard, he could save the province, and at the same time studied hard, he was admitted to graduate school, of course, the scholarship also increased some, after being admitted to graduate school, he needed to do some topics, and his studies became more and more arduous, he wanted to save part-time time, focus on his studies, and also make plans for his future family, so he did not tell his parents about the increase in scholarships. But his parents did not know where to learn the news of the increase in scholarships, ran to the school and scolded him, accused Wang Yongqiang of being ungrateful in public, scolded him for forgetting his parents' parenting grace when he was admitted to college, and leaving his poor family behind, regardless of whether this incident would have an extremely bad impact on Wang Yongqiang's life.
During this period, parents living in rural areas not only lacked literacy and shallow knowledge, but also made many unreasonable demands, such as asking him to help his relative's son go to college, finding a relaxed job for his brother who was polio, finding a wife, and so on. Wang Yongqiang felt more and more overwhelmed, and he understood that only by becoming more excellent could he get rid of the entanglement of his parents' infinite demands. So he worked hard. Finally, the kung fu paid off, she was admitted to peking university doctoral students, but also harvested their own love, but the exploitation of her parents continued, so in 1999 he and his wife discussed going abroad to Japan to develop a career. But Wang Yongqiang's parents, when they heard that their cash cow was leaving, did everything they could to obstruct him from going abroad, until Wang Yongqiang promised to borrow more money to subsidize the family.
After Wang Yongqiang went abroad, his parents demanded money more and more intensely, and the amount became higher and higher, and the frequency became faster and faster. Finally, the wife's unlimited demand for her in-laws and her husband's cowardice were intolerable, so she filed for divorce from Wang Yongqiang. The divorce made Wang Yongqiang feel devastated. Finally, disheartened, he went to the United States alone without anyone, and then never heard from him.
Just when Wang Yongqiang's career was thriving, he was caught in the storm of public opinion.
In 2019, 20 years after Wang Yongqiang went abroad, his parents used the online media to stir up public opinion and found their son in the United States. In their mouths, they are poor parents who have worked hard to support their son to the doctorate, and Wang Yongqiang is an ungrateful and filial son.
Netizens who did not know the truth began to strongly condemn Wang Yongqiang's ungrateful behavior, and demanded that he immediately return to China to take care of his mother, who was seriously ill and bedridden. However, Wang Yongqiang resolutely refused to return to China despite the pressure of public opinion, which also made netizens indignant, and all kinds of insults were unbearable.
He was also labeled by netizens as an unfilial and white-eyed wolf for a while. With the development of the network, now the spread of information is getting faster and faster, many people have only heard a little, and have not deeply understood a thing to begin to become a keyboard man, using the keyboard in their hands to vent their dissatisfaction.
As everyone knows, this kind of behavior of peeping leopard in the tube is childish and ridiculous, and it is very likely to be punched in the face. With the fermentation of the matter, people gradually realized that this matter is not so simple, and the public just listened to the words of Wang Yongqiang's parents.
At this time, Wang Yongqiang's uncle really couldn't look at it, and these evil words on the Internet came forward to expose the fact that Wang Yongqiang's parents were born without raising and exploiting their sons. Public opinion also reversed the wind and began to blame Wang Yongqiang's parents, and they immediately disappeared into the public's vision as soon as they saw that the momentum was not right, and the final result of this farce made people clap their hands.
And the netizens who understand the truth are also divided into two camps at this time, some people support Wang Yongqiang's approach, believing that filial piety should not be foolish, and some people continue to criticize, he believes that the grace of parenting is greater than heaven, even if parents are wrong, they should also fulfill their obligations as children. However, no matter how noisy the outside world's voices are, they cannot change Wang Yongqiang's determination not to return to China.
Just as the so-called unsound suffering of others, do not persuade others to be good, if you suffer through me, you may not have me. Filial piety is indeed very important, but parents should also let their children repay themselves in the right way, otherwise they will only make the family affection disappear.
I think, as Ding Yuanying said in the book "Distant Savior", if you raise your children to prevent aging, then don't say how great the love of your parents is, you raise them, or for yourself, that is exchange, and so on.
If the love of parents for their children is to run to raise children and prevent old age and bottomless demand, then this love is mixed with interests, and it is not pure and sacred. Whether it is raising children or preventing old age, it should come from the heart, the mother's kindness and filial piety are natural, if it is based on filial piety and demand, there is only one ending, that is, the change of taste of family affection.
Wisdom is not scarce, what is scarce is our cognition of the essence of things, thinking is the dimension, angle, position and foothold of thinking, we can only think about problems from different positions, in order to make things perfectly present their original appearance.
So, do you think Wang Yongqiang's approach is right, and am I right in my comment?