On the seventh day of the seventh month of the lunar calendar, the weaver girl crosses the river and uses the magpie as a bridge.
"As soon as the golden wind and jade dew meet, they will win countless victories in the world."
Some love, fill life, some love, create regrets, different times and encounters, the performance of love may be different, but the core of love is always two shining individuals, shining light on each other when they meet.
On this Tanabata, borrow Haizi's poems:
May you have a bright future / May you have a lover who will eventually become a family / May you be happy in this world
Cover Character [Tanabata Special] Episode 5: The Love of the Worship handle.
Sanger, a native of Chengdu, a college dropout who wrote fairy tales and almost lived in fairy tales;
Master Nine, formerly known as Jiang Jun, a native of Hubei, a scholar who studied rigorously and enjoyed a high reputation in the industry;
Two seemingly completely different people love each other, but confess that the most important thing in each other's lives is a high degree of consistency.
The love story of the pair, which has been hailed by book critics as quite Sanmao and Jose, can be told from a quarrel recorded in Sanger's book. In that quarrel, because of trivial matters, Sanger and the Nine Masters got into a fight to the point of breaking up. The man finally said, "Well, you let me do two things and then decide whether to break up or not." First, I'll help you out of a book, and second, I'll show you the world. ”
He then helped Sanger publish "When I Was a Child" and took her halfway around the world.
"Handsome guy is a good thing
A handsome guy is always a good thing."
Interviewing Sanger is an easy and somewhat tricky thing to do. Beginning with her first book, As a Child, she published a total of three and a half autobiographical works. This means that you can seem to get to know her life easily, but in the face of her experience of actively spreading out, it seems that certain questions have long been answered.
She is a tough existentialist, and many of the flashbacks in the book stitch together her maverick experiences:
As a teenager, he ran to Eying to find a director to make a movie, and later not only hosted a program on the radio to persuade others to divorce, but also became the beer lady who could sell the most; made a boyfriend she called "underworld", and finally dropped out of school because of the breakup; ran to Beijing to find a job, spent 80 yuan to buy a fake diploma, and found a job in a publishing house with his own words without using it; he went to a newspaper as a reporter, and ended up falling in love with the famous musician who was interviewed...
Such a resume, cool and innocent, everyone says that she is Sanmao in Taiwan, and Sagan in France, where it is a lively and fragrant talk of good material.
"I have very few social attributes, and doing things is more instinctively driven", looking back, Sanger also couldn't say what she was going to do back then, just charging and sweeping vigorously, she just felt, "I never think about not living, as long as your material requirements are lower, you will not live." The hormones of her adolescence exploded, like a wine table that could not be cleaned, and Sanger on the wine table must be the most active one, "every time you drink, you will get drunk, and then you will make a special fuss."
Until I met Jiang Jun in Beijing. The "Nine-Colored Deer Nine Master", whom she often writes about, is an independent artist and architectural scholar. And the story of the two acquaintances, Sanger described himself as "angry when he sees a handsome man", which is determined by the core idea of her outlook on life and worldview - "handsome guy is a good thing".
"Oh, you're weird! What is your name? "What's your name?" Under Sanger's repeated questioning, the Nine Masters were "forced" to know her, and Sanger named her "Nine Colored Deer".
As for why she called a nine-colored deer, she explained, the lover who knew everything seemed to her to be somewhere between an animal and a god—tired like a dog, asleep like a god. He always looked down at the earth with kind eyes, wet, "He got lost when he went down, and when he saw me going out to dump the scum, he knew me."
"After getting married, do you still think that a handsome guy is a good thing?" In 2012, in their third Olympic year, Sanger and the Nine Masters were officially married.
Coming out of the Civil Affairs Bureau, Sanger, who had short hair, looked at the wedding photo on the red book and teased that the two looked like buddies, and the Ninth Master did not deny it, "Yes, we are finally married as brothers." On the way home, the Ninth Master wondered if he should send something to the newlywed wife, and Sanger groaned a little back to him, or you would shoot five thousand pieces on my account. The Ninth Master agreed, and at that moment Sanger felt that the marriage would be over.
And after marriage, Sanger insisted that handsome men are a good thing, "handsome guys are always good things." But why do you keep good things, and how do you make yourself a good thing? She said it was her current deepening thinking about "a handsome guy is a good thing."
"I haven't hated you in a long time"
"Me too"
This is a development trend that Sanger never expected before. One day, after saying to each other, "I haven't hated you in a long time," the two walked into the Civil Affairs Bureau.
She once firmly believed that marriage is a very silly thing, no matter who she is with, "marriage is reasonable for the stability of social structure, but for love is a deformed system, if possible, I hope to get a marriage license with the person I love at the age of 80." 」 ”
Despite meeting the Nine Masters, it was a turning point in Sanger's life: he allowed Sanger's nature to converge and take refuge in Fufa. In Sanger's own words, it was like a small fish falling into a small river with water and grass.
After being with the Nine Masters, she began to shut herself up at home and begin to read more systematically, reading literature, reading history, and even studying architecture. It was as if all of a sudden the world consisted of two parts: "known" and "unknown.".
It was also at that time that the Ninth Master taught at the Guangzhou Academy of Fine Arts, and Sanger followed him to Guangzhou. Idle, she began to blog, writing more and more, so that she would be happy until she had to write something later. A place to record daily turnover, she wrote a miracle and began to have "fans".
In 2007, "When I Was a Child" was published, reprinted 13 times in six months, and still has a large readership to this day, which is a veritable bestseller. For Sanger, who was working on literature for the first time, the start was a bit high.
But the bestseller of "As a Child" itself was no match for another result: It was from the book that Sanger began his attempts to become a professional writer.
"The writing of "When I Was a Child" was entirely unconscious writing" is nothing more than a constant gush of memories in his head that prompt Sanger to knock them down and turn them into words. Even she herself could not explain why the memories of the two-year-old were so vivid. Sanger spent ten days a day at a rate of more than 10,000 words a day, day and night, completing the bulk of the entire book "When I Was a Child."
For this reason, since Sanger began writing, she has been barely able to work in her mandated state. Master Nine said that all her writing was spontaneous, and that no one else could ask her for a manuscript, but could only choose from the words she already had.
In fact, her only mandate is life itself, and others cannot predict how she will live tomorrow, so she cannot make an appointment with her in writing.
Perhaps for Sanger, there was never a "writing" thing, and every word she wrote was nothing more than a constant resurrection of memories.
"I don't feel talented, I don't have a very heavy reading habit, I'm more about grinding my heart", like running a marathon in the way of sprinting sprints, and finally one day Sanger realized that "this is an extremely clumsy and tragic thing" and became out of control.
She began to lose sleep all night and fell into a state of oversensitivity as soon as she wrote. This sensitivity makes both pleasure and pain infinitely large, and the nerves seem to lose their elasticity and no longer have a calm median. All emotions were a small explosion, hitting me like horses, causing unprovoked crying.
At first, in order to comfort her, the Ninth Master found the passbook and put it in the palm of her hand and said to her, saying to her that it was all yours. This is the pattern of their relationship, "During the nine years we were together, Gege spent most of his time either reading or playing", and the nine masters were busy with academics and work, giving Sanger a lot of time of his own and the freedom not to make compromises for life.
Later, this trick slowly became ineffective, and during the days when the Ninth Master went abroad to work and lecture, Sanger's poor situation made it impossible for him to take care of himself, and the take care of his friends was useless. The Ninth Master took her back to Chengdu and lived in the Department of Psychiatry, where Sanger was eventually diagnosed with depression.
The Ninth Master greatly shortened the trip abroad and accompanied gege who stayed up all night in the hospital. Watching her swallow four times the dose of sleeping pills but still awake, the Ninth Master prayed at the bedside and began to gather friends to accompany Sanger to play mahjong. This led Sanger to call himself "excellent" during his hospitalization, and after receiving praise from his attending physician, Sanger was discharged from the hospital and returned home.
For the sake of the unhealed Gege, the Ninth Master invented a cure for the symptoms: that is, before going out every time, he hid money around the house, and before leaving, he told Sanger that he hid 1,000 yuan in each place, from the bottom of the pillow to under the carpet, from the old book to the drawer, Sanger could find surprises almost every day, and began to live a regular life as much as possible in the instructions of the Ninth Master.
Inconsistencies in taste
Far greater than the betrayal of feelings
Under the prayers of the Nine Masters, the "Hidden Money Therapy" and the self-taught Chinese medicine treatment, Sanger gradually stepped out of the abyss brought to her by writing. She stopped writing for a long time, and in addition to insisting on reading, she learned the guqin, pottery, tea and coffee. In these ways, you can contemplate your breath and touch some kind of extremely rich world. That's a higher dimensional world. In a way, there is some nine-master temperament.
Sanger described the Nine Masters on Weibo as follows: "Not human at all."
In her eyes, the Ninth Master was more like coming from a galaxy, because "there are many things that humans can do that he is not good at, and there is no sign of learning them." And what he does, he also surprises normal humans."
In Sanger's eyes, the transcendent academic concepts and "international events" studied by the Ninth Master were not known and interested in by ordinary people, and even if she had insomnia, she would let the Ninth Master tell her about national events to help her fall asleep. "Ostensibly I married him, but I was diligently helping him translate, when he was dealing with humans."
The Ninth Master had almost the same sense of care for Sanger, and he always looked at Sangge with love in his eyes, "Oh, you are the little living Buddha I offered." It seems that each other feels that the other does not belong to the earthly world, and needs to give to each other and "rescue" each other.
Fortunately, this is exactly the state that Sanger recognizes, feelings are short-fought: "I love you and you have to love me, I give you you have to give me, I am good to you and you must be good to me", because if she does not get the same response, she will feel shocked and sad, "In my world this is taken for granted, I never thought of not receiving corresponding feedback when I gave."
This kind of direct, ignorant, and even reckless love had hurt her incomparably, and in the lover of the Ninth Master, she gained the strongest sense of security, "I am not good at cooking, the Ninth Master is huffing and eating the failed dishes I made, and I can actually find words to praise, I think we will not be separated for the rest of our lives." 」
And how to maintain this mutual giving for nearly two decades, and it is almost a broom-cherishing enthusiasm, Sanger said that most of the two people's lives are not love, more is fun. The interests and hobbies are highly consistent, making the two of them get along more like mentors and friends.
"The two of us often discuss a book and a movie for a period, and what we like together can make the space between the two of us, and there is new content added. Our differences are different on the surface, the educational environment and the background of our growth are different, but inside, we have very similar things, if we can't be highly consistent, we may have been separated a long time ago. The odds of an inconsistency leading to separation will be far greater for me than emotional betrayal."
She even gave an example that she might have inconsistent evaluations of a movie and wanted to divorce the other party, "I think this movie is too bad, how can you like this kind of movie, we can't be together." And what tends to be consistent is that the Ninth Master will also think, "I am also afraid that you like this movie, and if you like this movie, I will also want to divorce you." ”
In this way, your back and forth mouth is full of the daily life of the two people. "Choosing a person, fun is especially important, daily life is not about love."
"One more important," Sanger paused, looking me in the eye and saying in a soft and slow voice, "don't expect too much. Allow everyone to have blind spots and things you can't get. It is to try to make good use of what the two people have in common and what tolerance does not have. For example, my husband is a scholar..."
Finally Sanger stopped, feeling the impulsiveness and beauty of love, and she did not say it again, as if she had left herself a little secret.
Cover news reporter Liu Fu Shichen