In life, we can often see a strange phenomenon, that is, a child seems to be very sensible and intelligent, in the eyes of adults, such a child is very good, so it will definitely have good communication skills.
However, in general, such children often do not appear to be "out of place" as people think.
Xiaoli is such a child, Xiaoli seemed to be very sensible and smart when she was a child, and her academic performance after going to school was also very good, often full marks, which made parents and teachers very fond of it.
However, over time, Xiaoli's parents and teachers found a more abnormal problem, that is, Xiaoli did not like to "integrate into the group".
For example, when I was in school, many children in the class were playing together, but Xiaoli just turned a blind eye to this, and even when she received invitations from others, she was only a very shy single tool person, and did not take the initiative to accept small groups at all.
At home, too, many children in the same building in the community are good friends, but Xiaoli is an exception, even if she occasionally plays with them, there may be some small conflicts and so on. Overall, Xiaoli gives people the feeling of not being social.
Why is it that the smarter the child, the easier it is to "fall out of place"?
For Xiaoli's situation, Xiaoli's parents must be more worried, and they don't know whether Xiaoli is a personality disorder or a psychological problem, or what is difficult to say or anxious and panicful.
So, I consulted a relevant psychological friend, and this friend told Xiaoli's parents that in fact, it is a very common situation for smart children to appear so unsociable.
Kids are too smart to play with their peers
Smart children, their own "level" is relatively high. That is to say, the personal spiritual level of smart children is not on the same line as their peers.
When peers like to pee and mud, smart kids may feel cleaner with water and mud.
While peers argue about playing a few little monsters for Ultraman, smart kids are thinking about how black holes form and so on.
Simply put, it is the factor that can bring happiness to smart children, and the factor that can bring happiness to ordinary children is different, smart children like higher levels of happiness, and the average child does not have a common language, naturally can not play together.
Therefore, smart children will look out of place, in fact, it is not unsociable, but smart children have not found their "own group".
Smart kids have their own time plans
Generally speaking, smart children have better thinking development, and personal behavior habits, etc., will be better than their peers, have strong self-discipline and self-control, and it is precisely because smart children have these traits that they will become very smart.
They generally have their own time plans, such as what they need to do at a certain time, how long it takes to do a thing, and so on.
When these smart children are doing their own things, or when implementing a certain plan of their own, if there is a sudden group activity of the same age, or an invitation from the same age, etc., then the smart children in order to maintain their own regular plan, and the phenomenon of refusing the invitation and treating group activities negatively seems to be very unsociable.
In fact, smart children are not out of place, but just to efficiently plan their own growth.
Children who are too smart have a greater desire to learn
We can also find in ordinary life that those smart children often use their free time to learn.
Of course, the learning we are talking about here is not only the kind of cultural knowledge learning in schools, but also the children's learning of some unknown things such as life skills, extracurricular knowledge, and natural knowledge.
Simply put, smart children like to enrich their own insights, like to improve their knowledge reserves, like to seek the truth, like to turn the unknown into the known. That's why these kids act out of place.
In fact, these children are just to satisfy their own curiosity, in order to satisfy their own interests, they just prefer to explore the unknown, more like to study science.
Although the misfit of smart children is some "misunderstanding", if it is allowed to go unchecked for a long time, there will be some impact on the child's communication, which will make the child become more "lonely", resulting in some psychological or physical problems. Therefore, we need to intervene in this situation in a timely manner. So what should we do?
How do you make smart kids "gregarious"?
Help your child make some "like-minded" friends
It is difficult for children to interact with their peers, in fact, because of different interests and different ambitions, so parents can help their children find some like-minded friends in peacetime.
For example, other children who are also too smart to fit in. They have similar interests, similar pursuits, and the same spiritual level, so it is easier to interact harmoniously, thus solving the problem of children's missociation.
If parents do not know how to help their children find such "smart friends", they can actually help their children report some interest classes or certain activities that their children are interested in with their consent, where children are more likely to find friends who are "similar to their own smell".
Let the child understand the principle of "three people becoming a teacher"
Some intelligent children are so disturbed by the "class idea" that there is no merit in thinking that those "childish" behaviors are not desirable. But in fact, everyone has their own advantages and disadvantages, and everything has two sides.
Therefore, parents can teach their children not only to pursue the high-level spiritual world, but also to understand the bottom spiritual world, because only by understanding the bottom spiritual foundation can they better develop.
Simply put, it is "threesomes must have my teacher", do not feel that others are smarter than yourself, you know, you are likely to have some places that are inferior to others.
When children have such a concept, it is easy to accept the group of ordinary children, and they will not be out of place.
Write at the end
For smart children who do not fit in, parents should pay attention to it, and they should interfere in time to avoid children living in their own world for a long time, which will lead to growth obstruction.
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