01
In life, we like words like this: open the door, open the door and be blessed.
Open the door, you will see the happy things, there will be guests coming, you will be pleasantly surprised, and then the whole day is very comfortable.
When people are in the workplace, they have to go to work during the day, the door is closed, they go home at night to rest, and they don't want to be disturbed, and the door is still closed.
Therefore, when many people retire, they will think like this, idle, invite three or five relatives and friends to have a meal at home, or go to someone else's house to eat, and get back the feelings that have been lost in the past.
There is a saying in the countryside: "It is easy to please God, but it is difficult to send God." ”
If there is a bad person in the family, you will be very irritable, if you throw him out, you can't bear it, you can't find a suitable excuse, or the words of driving people to the mouth, or you still can't say it.
After retirement, warm hospitality is the love, closed door to thank guests is the duty, encounter the following kinds of "guests", it is best not to receive.
02
First, people who are in trouble are "provoking right and wrong" when they are guests.
Some people, all their lives, are "insufficient to achieve things, more than enough failures", on the surface is very positive, in fact, has been busy, to a certain age, things are not done well, but also caused a body of trouble.
When we interact with each other, we often say "trouble you". This is polite, but if there is really "trouble", it is better to avoid it.
When people are old, they must have the feeling of fear of difficulties, do not think that they are still young, and they are not afraid of heaven.
In the twenty-first volume of "The Surprise of the Second Moment Shooting", there is a person named Zhang Shan who opens a small shop. One day, a middle-aged prince came to spend the night with a group of people, and there were several large boxes on the carriage, and a coffin.
Wang Jue's brother died in a foreign country and could only be transported back to his hometown by horse-drawn carriage. At the same time, the brother did business, made a lot of money, and put it on the carriage.
At night, the chariot took a box of gold and silver treasure and fled. Everyone thinks that Zhang Shan saw the money in his eyes and stole it with the people who drove the car, which is really indefensible.
Immediately after, the government intervened in this matter, and Zhang Shan was busy receiving officials every day, and there was no income from a penny.
People who are in trouble, if they come to you, must refuse to meet, otherwise you will be involved in right and wrong, and the good days will become bad days.
For example, if a junior is hiding in Tibet because of theft, if you want to hide in your house, you want to take it in, and you inexplicably become an accomplice. Not to mention the money for a meal, the reputation of a lifetime was also ruined.
Man, more is better than less. We want to help kind, clean people, not those who cause trouble.
03
Second, those who pretend to be gods and ghosts are "deceived in them."
There is such a story in the "History of Xiaowu Benji": When Emperor Wudi of the Han Dynasty was old, he believed in strange things such as immortality;
There was an alchemist named Luan Da, who said, "There are really gods and immortals on Penglai Immortal Island." ”
Then, Luan Da took out a chessboard, read the words, and the chess pieces actually moved. Emperor Wudi of Han was stunned and convinced.
Then, Luan Da touted himself again, and he could turn stones into gold. Step by step for your own benefit.
One day, Emperor Wudi of Han said to the people around him: "The ancient books say that if a person is one inch longer, his life expectancy will increase by one hundred years." ”
Minister Dongfang Shuo couldn't help but laugh out loud: "It is said that Peng Zu has lived for hundreds of years, and his people are not a few inches long, ah, how big a face does it take to accommodate it?" ”
Suddenly, everyone laughed. Emperor Wudi of Han was no longer convinced of strange things.
Retired elderly people must know how to "learn from history." For thousands of years, it has been recognized as a sentence, "It is not strange to see the strange, and its strangeness is self-defeating."
In ordinary life, we must remember that pinching your fingers is cheating money.
If someone comes and says something supernatural, or scares you, you're going to drive him away. He is mostly a liar, using some nonsense to hurt your heart and calculate your money.
Although the pension has always been there, if you are deceived, most of the life savings will be gone; if the children know these things, the family will be noisy, and everyone will be cold.
When we go to work, we make money, mainly by sweat and wisdom, and never by deception. Just by leaving the workplace, you can't lose all the money you make.
04
Third, people who have been borrowing for a long time are "disturbing life" as guests.
As the saying goes: "Guests stay for three days to be annoying, and fish for three days to stink." ”
After retirement, it was originally to live a quiet life, if there were guests every day, you had to cook, accompany guests, and the smoke miasma at home.
To give two examples: First, there are children from relatives who want to study in the city and let you manage your meals every day. It looks good, but once you take over, you get up early every day, you may have to pick up, and if the child is disobedient, you are also worried
Second, there are friends who come to the city to do business, live in your house every day, and in the evening, they move miscellaneous things to the house, and the whole house is messy.
Leave time for yourself and your family. Idle, cook with your wife, do housework, and don't treat guests every day. If you have relatives and friends who stay overnight for a long time, you should learn to refuse.
The most incredible thing is that the person who has been a guest in your house for a long time will be anti-guest because they are more and more familiar with each other. The next time you want to drive him away, he thinks you are "not concerned about blood relations, do not give face, will not be an elder, and are too outward-looking." You posted money, and you're not human inside and out.
05
In the I Ching, it is said: "There are mountains under the heavens, and a gentleman is far from a small man, not evil but strict." ”
The people who always come to disturb you, the people who destroy your life, are actually villains. No matter what kind of relationship he has with you, you have to close the door. After all, the other party's starting point is not right.
The retired elderly who are really better are those who are good at "seclusion", less interpersonal communication, more family interaction.
Of course, xie ke can not be forced to come, try to avoid conflict, be polite.
First, find an excuse to make the other party embarrassed to stay. You can say that you are going to travel to a certain place recently, your children are far away, you need to see for yourself, etc.
Second, if you really want to eat a meal, you can eat in a small restaurant, and when you finish eating, everyone will disperse and be well. When the social place is changed, the other party will also realize the word "disturb".
Third, insist on quitting some unnecessary circles, and there are fewer people to interact with. The group of the original unit, the relatives who tend to be inflamed, etc., can break off diplomatic relations.
The distinguished guests come, welcome; the regulars come, casually; the villains come, closed doors.
Author: Cloth coarse food.
Follow my words and go into your heart.
The illustrations in this article come from the Internet.